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?SA and vasectomy question

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 PurpleBirch (original poster member #39170) posted at 4:57 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

So WH went for his vasectomy Wednesday. The doctor said he has to go back in three months or '20 cums' to see if it worked. WH is still in a bit of pain, and moving rather slow. I'm getting to my question... He admitted this morning that he is already at '1', and that he did it the day after the surgery. I already think he may be a SA, and this kind of makes me think it even more. So friends (males mostly I guess), normal to masturbate the day after your vasectomy or no?

Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2013   ·   location: The frozen North, eh?
id 6375724
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ChesterChump ( new member #38094) posted at 9:10 AM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

Personally I couldn't imagine doing that the day after mine. It's not really that painful (maybe on par with a cervical exam?) but there's a lot of swelling and soreness. It would be like eating a huge, tough steak the day after having oral surgery.

posts: 26   ·   registered: Jan. 12th, 2013
id 6375800
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 PurpleBirch (original poster member #39170) posted at 2:03 PM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

I can sort of see if he wants to make sure things "still work", but he's still pretty sore and slow, so I thought it odd.

Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2013   ·   location: The frozen North, eh?
id 6375903
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windowsnotwalls ( member #36983) posted at 3:09 PM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

Mine is SA and has a vasectomy and took a few days off of anything after his. it did heal rather quickly. There's a lot more to SA than just one flag, though, and if you have doubts there's a website that has both a questionaire for partners and for the potential addict. I suggest going there or to see a CSAT if you continue to have concerns.

http://www.sexhelp.com

Me (39): BS
Him (39): WS
Praying my way through each day.
Content (Philippians 4: 11b-13)

posts: 621   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2012   ·   location: Clarksville, TN
id 6375950
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 PurpleBirch (original poster member #39170) posted at 3:49 PM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

Thanks windowsnotwalls! I will take a look at that

Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2013   ·   location: The frozen North, eh?
id 6375976
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BeyondBreaking ( member #38020) posted at 6:06 PM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

Woah, woah, woah: not to t/j here, but 20 cums is supposed to be the average for 3 months? That's what, once every 3 days?

I know for a fact that fiancé gets off more often then that. He used to JO everyday- now that I cut off porn, I think he is down to once a day, maybe once every other day. We don't have sex that much though (that is improving this last week), so I don't know for sure.

Now I am concerned about SA as well,

I have been cheated on by 3 different men, and I have more DDays than anyone ever should. I am here, just trying to pickup the pieces.

"What did you expect? I am a scorpion."

posts: 879   ·   registered: Jan. 5th, 2013
id 6376112
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Pass ( member #38122) posted at 11:22 PM on Sunday, June 16th, 2013

Dude, the first day after my vasectomy I was still sitting on bags of ice. I can't imagine having wanted it so badly to be pounding at the area that day - even that week.

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6376343
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 PurpleBirch (original poster member #39170) posted at 12:42 AM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

He's only taken one T3 on the first day, so I know it's not horrible pain, but he is still walking around slowly. As of yesterday, he said it still hurt to pick up the baby, so yeah.

Lol @beyondbreaking. I thought it was a bit unrealistic. 20 cums = 3 months? I'm thinking more like 2 months if we're talking about 3x a week.

Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2013   ·   location: The frozen North, eh?
id 6376389
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:39 AM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

I think it's different for each guy. My H had it on a Friday m

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6376430
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:43 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Stupid I phone.

My answer was supposed to be ....My H had his on a Friday, and took off the following Monday, in case he was sore, he had a fairly physically active job at the time.

He ended up spending the Monday cutting and splitting wood. He had minor pain, and only used ice packs for the fist day.

On the other side if it, I don't recall him waiting very long. We were told 20 times then recheck, it was at least 30 by the time he got checked, and yup he still had swimmers, so had to go another 20 times, and recheck, finally clear after that. YIKES.

For any out there that want this as a permanent method of BC MAKE SURE THEY GET CHECKED FOR SWIMMERS.... I could have very easily ended up with 3 kids instead of two had I not.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6376714
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Kelany ( member #34755) posted at 2:59 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

As to the SA side you need a diagnosis for that. Please don't read into it just based on them masturbating shortly after a vasectomy or every other day. There would be other indicators.

My FWH is a diagnosed SA. He was masturbating up to 4 times a day, compulsively looking at porn daily, masturbating at work, in the car, in our driveway after getting home late at night. Looking at porn on his phone, on our computer, on our kids, he was lying about it constantly and he had multiple affairs, even "cheating" on one of his AP's.

He'd have sex at work, before, during and after work hours. Sometimes he'd even get caught, technically by other employee's knocking on his office door and he'd just ignore it.

It was also more about his compulsive thought patterns. All he could think about was sex. Getting his next "fix" meaning when could he get off again. He'd get agitated until he did. If he saw a woman in a low cut shit, he'd start to fantasize about her. Tight pants? What would she look like naked? THen his thoughts would spiral out of control until he could either have sex or masturbate.

There is a LOT to a SA than just jacking off a day after a vasectomy.

BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12

Former 80s Icon wishful thinking

posts: 2031   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2012
id 6376792
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