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Off Topic :
It's time - hospice for Mom

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dameia ( member #36072) posted at 3:36 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

I'm so sorry. Sending prayers your way.

Me: BS
D-Day: 7/7/12

Trust is like paper. Once it's crumpled it can never be perfect again.

posts: 1470   ·   registered: Jul. 9th, 2012
id 6379141
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tesla ( member #34697) posted at 3:59 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

((((NIK))))

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

posts: 5066   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2012
id 6379163
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fraeuken ( member #30742) posted at 4:16 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

So sorry to read this. No words, just hugs and prayers.

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

posts: 1334   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6379176
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FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 7:06 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Aw NIK, sometimes the hits just never seem to stop.

I'm so sorry.

Rest and be strong for your lovely dad.

xo FF

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21594   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6379293
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deeplysad ( member #16590) posted at 7:44 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I'm so sorry.

(((NIK)))

Me: BW - I'm much too young to feel this damn old
Him: FWH - Midlife crisis with a pathetic porn wannabe
D-Day: August 2004; Lots of false R until February 2005.

posts: 3413   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2007   ·   location: So Calif
id 6379314
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dreamlife ( member #8142) posted at 10:10 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Hospice was wonderful for my mother, and later for my father, too.

I was still in shock from my son's death when my mother entered Hospice care so that is very blurry, but I hope to have Hospice in future should I need them as all I wish for is to be kept comfortable, period.

NIK~ You can PM me at this sorrowful time, too.

(((((sending huge warm hugs))))

~XWH told me what I wanted to hear but he always did whatever he wanted to do~

"He called me a bitch.
I called him an ambulance."
Linda H.)

posts: 26209   ·   registered: Sep. 7th, 2005
id 6379338
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metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 10:54 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((((((nik)))))))))

Sending love and strength to you. I am sorry.

Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.

posts: 52157   ·   registered: Sep. 14th, 2006
id 6379348
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authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 11:15 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

I'm so sorry.

DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.

posts: 55165   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2007
id 6379354
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circe ( member #6687) posted at 11:25 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK))))

I'm so sorry. Sending you and your family warm hugs.

In our experiences with Hospice, they were angels and made things as peaceful and comfortable as you could ask for when the end came. Ours had such a calming air that they somehow made it seem like the simple task of our home for those days was a natural letting go. Especially as your Dad has been her caregiver, much of the mantle of day to day care can be removed from his shoulders and let him say goodbye in peace.

Everything I ever let go of has claw marks on it -- Infinite Jest

posts: 3459   ·   registered: Mar. 19th, 2005
id 6379357
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AFrayedKnot ( member #36622) posted at 12:28 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

In our experiences with Hospice, they were angels

^^^amen

Your family is is my prayers

BS 48fWS 44 (SurprisinglyOkay)DsD DSA whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better."Knowing is half the battle"

posts: 2859   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2012
id 6379378
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 12:37 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I'm so sorry NIK.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6379385
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heartache101 ( member #26465) posted at 12:42 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

I am so sorry..

There are degrees to which you let people back into your life and degrees to which you let them back into your heart-which, of course, are not the same thing

posts: 3225   ·   registered: Dec. 8th, 2009   ·   location: Indiana
id 6379388
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lynnm1947 ( member #15300) posted at 1:55 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK))) So sorry.

Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks

posts: 8765   ·   registered: Jul. 11th, 2007   ·   location: Toronto, Canada
id 6379454
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itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 2:13 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

((((((((NIK and family)))))))))

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6379476
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Amazonia ( member #32810) posted at 2:27 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

posts: 14469   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2011
id 6379495
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ajsmom ( member #17460) posted at 2:37 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Awww, NIK.

Huge hugs, sister.

There are true angels that work in hospice care. I assure you they will do all they can to make your mom's transition as peaceful as possible.

AJ's MOM

Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
One AMAZING DS - 34

posts: 21424   ·   registered: Dec. 21st, 2007   ·   location: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
id 6379515
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 2:39 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK))))

The only bad thing about Hospice is too many people wait too long to get the benefit of it.

Make sure you all take adavantage of the grief support that they (should) offer to the family too.

I have been on both sides of Hospice as a caregiver, and as a family member, and can say my experiences have been of peace, love, and support.

God bless all of you, and may your mom have peace and comfort.

(((and strength)))

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20381   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6379517
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karmahappens ( member #35846) posted at 2:46 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

(((NIK)))

Your post made my heart hurt. I have yet to get to this stage in my life and I dread the day it comes.

Prayers for you and your family in the tough days to come.

(((hugs))) to your dad.

I am so truly sorry for your pain.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

posts: 4036   ·   registered: Jun. 13th, 2012   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6379526
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 3:38 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Thank you all. You would think that having years to prepare would make this easier, but it really doesn't.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6379609
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click4it ( member #209) posted at 6:19 PM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

((((((NIW)))))))

It doesn't matter how long you have to prepare - there is no preparing for seeing someone go. I am so sorry. I know its little comfort, but we are all here for you.

Hugs again.

Me: 45
Two boys: 20 and 17
Divorced 12-13-05
d-day 10-02-01

Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?

posts: 25706   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2002   ·   location: California
id 6379825
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