This Topic is Archived
Delilah169 ( member #43689) posted at 7:58 PM on Wednesday, August 6th, 2014
I'm so sorry you had to go home! That sucks; I assumed it was all over by now. I will keep sending good thoughts your way.
A couple of the new posts make sense. The baby knowing "dad" wasn't there. The revenge factor.
But in the long run, none of that matters. What matters is whatever makes YOU comfortable. Lots of dads aren't there, and there's lots of reasons for it. That's a way in the future issue.
You need to deal with the here and now. On the upside, if he is there, you can abuse him and yell at him a lot; everyone does during delivery. . . 
Me - BS, Him - WS
Her - POS WB Fake Friend
Married - 22 Years, together 25
One 22 yo DD
DD - 4/28/13, TT for over a year
Doing well with R
"Life might be a little simpler if we just got over it"
"It all seems so clear in hindsight"
blindsided81 ( member #44206) posted at 1:53 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Go with your instincts. Whatever is helpful to you. This is all that matters!
Me, BW 51
WH, 47
OW, ttw (trailer trash whore)
DD, 7/21/14
Separated, divorcing his ass as soon as I possibly can!!
Tigaress ( member #43954) posted at 1:57 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Hey there! I assume I'm probably too late and baby is already here so I won't give you my two cents ;-) But hope all went well!!
Althea ( member #37765) posted at 2:05 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Just dropping in to say that I'm thinking of you and that sweet new baby. My birth team was amazing for DD #3 and I felt so loved and cared for. WH's presence was not a huge factor either way. I hope the same was true for you.
Taking it one day at a time.
12yearsloyal ( member #43064) posted at 2:54 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Congrats! As the others say, do what is best for you. He can wait in the hallway and he is still there for the birth if the child asks down the road.
Him: WS, 51 EA/PA 2.5 years
D Day 3/10/14 N/C broke (phone/email) 6/14-10/14
Me: BS 52
OW: Banana Republic whore
Status: Fence sitting or D Praying for answers
Betrayal: so painful it should be a crime - 12 months in prison.
nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 3:02 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Jumping jacks....long walks....jumping jacks.....scrub a floor.....
C'mon baby! We wanna hear about you!
So frustrated for you that you had to go home.
Stay hydrated. It will come....
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
RawDeal75 ( member #42495) posted at 10:38 AM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
I agree with other posters here. Go with your gut and think about YOU.
I do think Alonelyagain and Devastated30 bring up good points though, especially considering many couples actually manage to R after all. If you end up divorcing, in the long run, would it matter to you if he was there or not?
I hope all works out smoothly for you during delivery! Keeping my fingers crossed! Good luck and congratulations!
Me: BH, 39. Her: WW, 39. Two kids: 3&5
Together 21 yrs. Married 13 yrs.
D-day #2 Jan 18, 2014: 12 month EA/PA (AP#3)+ admission of 5 month EA/PA in 1994 (AP#1).
D-day #1 May 2001: 2 month EA/PA (AP#2)
Delilah169 ( member #43689) posted at 4:15 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Broken, I hope you haven't posted recently b/c the baby finally came. ..
Please keep us posted, I at least, and I think we all, are on pins and needles.
About the sweet baby, and your decision.
I truly hope all is well.
(((((Hugs)))))
Me - BS, Him - WS
Her - POS WB Fake Friend
Married - 22 Years, together 25
One 22 yo DD
DD - 4/28/13, TT for over a year
Doing well with R
"Life might be a little simpler if we just got over it"
"It all seems so clear in hindsight"
steppingup ( member #42650) posted at 4:27 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Yes, where is the baby. I love fresh baby smell, so sweet.
BrokenDoe (original poster member #44077) posted at 4:43 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Waters broken. Just heading back to town now. Feeling hopeful.
BW 36
WH 36
Married 10 years less a week, together 16, friends 24
DDay July 2 2014
Children DD 7 & 4DS
Separated but living together day 5. I hate my life
hopingforhappy ( member #29288) posted at 4:48 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
If your water has broken, something will happen--or the docs will make it happen! Good luck to you and your beautiful baby.
Me--BW (57)
Him--FWH (54)--5yr. LTA--OW probably BPD
Married 21 years
DS-19, DD-16
Reconciling--but boy is it hard!
Losttransport ( member #39409) posted at 4:48 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Good luck! Prayers for a safe delivery and sweet baby soon :)
Me: BS-50
Hubby: WS-50
OW: his high school girlfriend
Affair started last November
3 DD, 1 DS all grown
Time heals all wounds-I do not agree.
RippedSoul ( member #40055) posted at 4:56 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
If he's not being a jerk, please consider allowing him to be there. We mothers sacrifice a lot for our children--sometimes too much--but this is a biggie. I would put my child first. Not me. Not my WH. My baby.
My SLAWH was deployed when our first was born. We've tried to focus on that being unique and positive, but I know there are times she feels less special and less important. If I could have given her a daddy in that birthing room, I'd do it. Granted, he hadn't cheated then, so I realize that from a mother's standpoint, it's apples and oranges, but from a baby's, it's exactly the same.
I think it pays to be magnanimous here. If he's being supportive, allow him to stay. He'll always be the daddy even if he isn't always the husband.
More than anything, best wishes and hugs. You truly should NOT be worrying over something like this at a time like this. I'd love to have a magic wand and make it all poof. Much love.
BW: 55; SLAWH: 52; M: 28 yrs
DD#1--11/30/12 (prostitute 1)
DD#2--1/29/13 (WH confessed: P1, AP, escorts 1 & 2)
DD#3--9/13 (trolling MILF site)
DD#4--10/8/13 (EA with AP cont'd)
DD: 26; DD: 24; DS: 22; DS: 20
I've never NOT edited my posts.
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 5:18 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Woo Hoo, broken water means a you will not be sent home this time.
(((and strength, and a speedy, easy delivery))))
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
Delilah169 ( member #43689) posted at 5:37 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Thanks for the update! Water breaking, awesome. Won't be long now.
Good luck, speedy and painfree (lol) delivery wishes to you.
Keep up updated please.
And whatever you decide, it will be the right decision for YOU. And you matter. . . .
(((Hugs)))
Me - BS, Him - WS
Her - POS WB Fake Friend
Married - 22 Years, together 25
One 22 yo DD
DD - 4/28/13, TT for over a year
Doing well with R
"Life might be a little simpler if we just got over it"
"It all seems so clear in hindsight"
CB217 ( new member #44245) posted at 10:50 PM on Thursday, August 7th, 2014
Whatever you decide will be the right thing for you. Early congrats on the new baby. Wishing you an easy delivery of a healthy bouncing baby.
Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 1:08 AM on Friday, August 8th, 2014
Sending SI mojo for an easy delivery and a healthy baby.
Grabbing the popcorn..
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
ChangeMaker ( member #43899) posted at 1:46 AM on Friday, August 8th, 2014
I'm glad I'm not the only one on the edge of my seat!
Good luck Doe!
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
DDay - June 2014
DD 2008 & 2011
Divorced April 1, 2015
NobleHeart ( new member #44414) posted at 3:29 AM on Friday, August 8th, 2014
If I were you, I wouldn't let him come near me! But then again, I am pissed for what just happened to me.
On the other hand, you can let him in and show him that you are a better person!
May God bless you and your baby!
determinata ( member #42124) posted at 3:39 AM on Friday, August 8th, 2014
First off---
You are having a baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is such a wonderful (and hard!) thing. But mostly wonderful.
The emphasis is what makes this good for YOU.
Not your husband.
Not your extended family.
Not your kids in the future. (You can tell them any reason he wasn't there--including the truth.)
You, right now.
If you want him out, put him out.
If you want him in but only attending to business with no lovey-dovey, do that.
If you want to pretend all is well for the duration of your labor and do the love-dove thing, do that.
Giving birth is a life and death exercise. You do whatever it takes to get you and the babe through. You are not the first nor last woman whose child's father will not be in the delivery room, if you make that choice. Please understand it is not a revolutionary nor life-altering choice. You are the one who counts right now.
M 2007. DDay 2008
~10+ CL Prostitutes in 8 months
Divorcing SAWH "ActionsOverWords"
Me: Early 30s BW (also an adult OC) w Baby DS
6 years of TT, hidden STD & false R
Separated 5 mos+; he will not commit
Someday I will be okay
This Topic is Archived
