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I am on 25 mg of Zoloft after dday. Anti-depressants aren't happy pills. They get you up to your normal level of functioning. So if you can barely get out of bed they allow you to work and get stuff done just as if you were going about a regular day. Anti depressants won't take away your sadness over your partner's infidelity or make you so happy it will be "easy" to forgive. I have many ups and downs still, but I can help my kids with their homework without getting lost in my sad thoughts. I can get my house cleaned. Sometimes it gives you MORE clarity because you aren't acting out of pure sadness. I told my WH to leave our house so many times and then changed my mind before anti depressants simply because every time I felt the insurmountable pain it's the only thing I could think to do whether it was a good idea or not. Now that I'm on anti depressants I can think more clearly about my plan of action. If you take the meds DO NOT stop taking them cold turkey. Ask your doc how to taper off after you feel better. Good luck to you.

I want to add a strong "yeah that^" about not stopping cold turkey. Seriously. Dont do it. Its bad.

And yes, i have more clarity when i am properly medicated.

Are you sleeping?

Are you having obsessive worry?

Are you waking up in a full panic?

If yes to any of these talk to your Dr. You may also benefit from some antianxiety medications. For me I was in a full on fight flight mode for at least 6 months. Often sleeping less than 3 hours a night. if I didn't sleep o couldn't eat and without either my ability to keep my shot together was impacted and my ability to make sound decisions and think clearly was impacted significantly.

Antianxiety medications helped fix that. That gave me strength and clarity. which in turn allowed me to demand what I needed and start to heal myself.

Wellbutrin and most antidepressants aren't magic and take weeks to months to see their effectiveness. I also am a firm believer that meds alone are the best bet. Meds with therapy to help you to start healing has a much more positive impact sooner.

Lastly start making you your number one priority. Along with getting decent sleep, clean up your diet. Force yourself to walk at least every other day for 20 minutes. If you have time for more do more. Get the good natural chemicals pumping through your system. Do onenkind thing for yourself every day. A long bath with a funny book. A walk with your favorite jams. A favorite coffee treat. Whatever. But start treating yourself like the kick ass queen you are. It will help with healing. It will help you find yourself again.

Lastly break out of the negative self talk. I see it in your posts. You question if ADs will make you a failure. Quit worrying about that and what people think and start doing you. Be yourself. You are strong smart and brave. You can get through this and come out stronger. Consider picking up a hobby that you have always wanted to do but never had the time money or confidence for.

Thi gs I've done post DD to help me find me include becoming a Beekeeper and starting a small business with it. Learning to ride a street bike. Getting scuba certified. Expanding my culinary skills. Teaching myself to crochet and making many many gifts that are beautiful. Next on my list is a pottery class and guitar lessons.