SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Chair

Washer

Dryer

2 Cheesy Plastic Wine glasses

A sympathy card

A fake sunflower

A mountain of clothing

Too much money

Some bridges

A few egos

The last item I have yet to dispose of

Bridges of Madison County

DVD version given to me to watch with my FWH by MOW...because she was such a generous friend....

I have that sucker on reserve in an out of sight out of mind place.

Last dday during our confrontation I got out marriage cert from frame and lit it on fire right then and there saying what a stupid f****$&% waste of time! At first I went to smash the frame to get cert out but I liked it too much.

A remote control, the keyless lock/unlock mechanism on a key chain, and my wife's evil cell phone (my daughters helped with that one, we even had a ceremony).

Other than that, the only violence I've displayed is smacking my forehead hard with the palm of my hand. Which for some strange reason seems to relieve the pain when it's at its worst. I've probably done that less than 10 times in the year since D Day.

OH Sal you just reminded me of an important item I forgot!

The crackberry.

submersed in a glass of water, then cracked! Very cathartic.

First I smashed his phone because she emailed and texted daily (work). I thru a beer bottle at him. Knocked hole in wall when it hit. I cut up one of his out fit. I think he wore it w her. And I was collecting my fav pottery for our home we were going to retire to, I smashed it all with hammer. I'm 5 years out. I am now redecorating and ridding myself of anything at that time. I tried to keep busy and Renew refresh. After dd. Now I look at it and remember how crazy I was. I don't think I'm. Finished by along shot. I wonder if I will ever stop dating everything. Before affair. After affair. When I didn't know. After I saw.......these are my calendars. I try to fix everything around me. I can't fix him I can't smash this

I smashed a big trunk and broke a big heavy flashlight at the same time by repeatedly hitting the trunk with the flashlight. Better the trunk than his head. I did chuck an empty plastic soda water bottle at his head. I also knocked a hole in the wall throwing his packed suitcase down the stairs. The hole is still there, three years later, hidden behind a piece of furniture. All of this was when he was still outright lying to me. I gave the expensive chess set she gave him for Christmas to a non-profit for a fundraising raffle. He had lied and said he got it as a door prize at an office Christmas party he claimed to have gone to on Christmas Day, at opposing counsels office, during trial, that he had allegedly been invited to on Christmas Eve... A party no one else will even pretend happened. He never did admit the truth about that, he just stopped saying anything when I brought it up. He also never asked where the chess set went to.

Dday was just over three years ago. About 6-7 months after Dday I discovered he was at it again. All hell broke loose in my head. I was preparing my move overseas and was not going to leave a THING behind that any whore might enjoy. Not sure I can list everything!

Use sharpie marker on the suit he wore at our wedding. (He holds that against me to this day I'm pretty sure and for the life of me I don't know why.)

Broke every single wine or cocktail glass. Shredded the pool loungers. Took loads of crap out to the street - books, plants, pictures, anything that might be enjoyed by a whore in my home.

Threw away his perfectly good and very expensive leather jacket I'd bought for him. No whore was going to see how handsome he looked in that!

Burned our ketubah (which I now regret).

Broke or trashed just about anything that a whore in my home might enjoy when I was gone.

I really lost my mind that week. It was either hurt/damage that crap or quite possibly hurt myself.

I'm pretty sure that H still holds that week of insanity against me. It's one of the things he needs to wrap his head around and start to understand in order for R to really begin.

Gawd that was an awful week.

Geez. I just packed his things up and left them in boxes for him to pick up...letters, cards, photos, gifts. In a previous relationship I threw furniture into the swiming pool when I was really angry. I guess I've mellowed.

I still have our wedding album. I go back and forth on what to do with it. I wonder if the kids would want it. That's the only thing that keeps me from throwing it in the trash.

I took a page from another SIer, BoogerBear? I think. She said she had trashed a house and it gave me an epiphany. Like it was ok to express yourself like that.

I shredded every card he every gave me - that was a lot, I keep everything and we had been together for 17 years, all our wedding pictures, old playboys we used to read together and we had kept our favorites over the years - all gone.

I cut up all lingerie I had ever worn for him - I don't really get that one anymore, I could have just tossed it emotionally it just needed to be gone but it was fun I guess. I completely destroyed everything "special" that we had bought for us and smashed his laptop.

And I pounded our wedding rings flat with a hammer.

I credit that month of therapeutic destruction as the reason I was able to move forward and be happy. I got it all out of my system.

This is way too much fun. I've been laughing all morning reading it. mine is rather lame in comparison.

Flowers: three dozen crappy roses, into the yard, three different times.

His clothes: into the yard (sans hefty bags), the night he botched his NC.

Apparently I have a thing about our yard. Maybe I'm a closet recycler.

I had my FWH scrub the passenger seat of his car right after D-Day. We kept the car and for two years I sat in the Whoremobile.

Last week, it needed a new tire so FWH brought it to the dealer. While there, he saw a car that he liked. I drove up, we bought it and traded his in. I felt a little cheated as I didn't have a chance to give the slut car a proper farewell.

Since this happened so quickly, he threw everything from the old car into a box. A few days later he said "look, I still have the cigarette lighter." I took it, smashed it with a hammer and spat on it.

I smashed the rock album of her affair partner. She had not told me his name, but I remembered that she had recently bought a rock album from her "penpal" and that is how I identified him.

This:

plus my bad aim, but surprising ability to throw really really hard =

after being embedded in the wall, the damned thing still worked!!! For a split second in my rage, I had the rational thought of "wow, this is a well made phone"

The hole is still there, with a decoration hung over it now. I won't repair it, as a reminder to myself as to how I lost control of myself and never allowing that to happen again.

**ps- I still have that phone and I bet if I plugged it in and charged it, it would no doubt work perfectly.

***I am not being paid to endorse Nokia phones, but hey, the proof is in the drywall...

I burned all of H boxers. I started with one pair, but then realized that they were all probably skanked up by AP so they all went in the fire.

I backed the leased fuck truck into AP car. I found H at her house and while they were inside I got into the truck and gently pushed the hitch right through the grille and radiator. And then just for good measure I backed up a couple of times extra. That hitch was just the right height to match the headlights too....and I'm really good at backing up Didn't leave a scratch on the truck.

Flatlined, you rock!

Burnt

bed, sofa, 2 books,

OW's stuff left in my house; threw her other crap in rest area trash can far away from us

Slashed H's fav chair he sat in while whore shopping but duck taped and covered it. Took desktop and tossed around room for same reason but didn't break.

Trashed man cave room where he got the 30 year old condoms.

Smashed glasses used by OW and some of my own dishes cuz I needed to smash something else into trash so no big clean up

Cut bottom of pocket in fWHs fav jeans so things kept falling out; Cut and ripped shirts to represent that he wore clothes I bought and cleaned for him when seeing OW. Also wrote big X on my own underwear and wore in front of him to show he went somewhere else instead of to me.

Trashed living room by flipping over bookcases on furniture while fWH was out.

Punched pillows to express my anger and satisfy the fight or flight instinct

When noone else home I wailed loudly while walking places where OW went in my home.

Used remarkable markers on white fridge to communicate thoughts and feelings to fWH. Also drew funny caricatures of super tall man trying to eff super short whore and posted in bathroom for him to see.

Sprayed carpets with lysol to kill her coodies

[This message edited by whattheh at 1:50 PM, February 8th (Saturday)]

New Year's Eve our wedding picture mysteriously fell off the wall shattering the glass and busting frame. It's a shame- I liked that frame. I also have a pair of his boxers - they just suddenly appeared at our weekend get away home. They are Lucky brand and he said he bought them at wal-mart. Wally world does not carry Lucky brand. I'd like to acquire the other two pair of boxers that say Lucky all over them so I will have the whole ensemble. And then......I'll post an update!

Yep- who's lucky now!!!!????

Thank-you people! I have been feeling like a crazy woman because I've cut up all of his favorite "Columbia" shirts and other favorite clothes, i destroyed his favorite picture and frame, took a scissor to his favorite feather down pillows.

We had a horrible fight, he is the one who put a huge hole in bedroom wall. Next day, he repaired it with sheetrock. That night, I took my handy dandy scissors and messed up the repair work that he had done.

I feel crazy and he calls me a crazy woman now. I call him a liar and a cheat. I love this man...?

On dday he was out of town for two days. I didn't destroy anything because I wasn't sure if the relationship was over, or could be saved. If I'd known he was going to come home and be totally remorseless and demanding D, I would have made good use of those two days. He would have come home to all his possessions on the first lawn, his four guitars in pieces on the driveway, changed locks and a sign on the door that said "Fuck off, you cheating asshole. You don't live here anymore."

But... that's what I wish I had done. All I actually did during 8 days of in house separation was cut up his favorite t-shirt and throw it out with the dirty cat litter. I also put every card he'd ever given me in a hanging file labeled "Lies you told" and packed it with the rest of his paperwork. In a box I put all photos that were legitimately his, along with some photos of us. Some whole, some torn. Also in the box was every card I ever gave him, torn to pieces.

I hope OW is the one who found the "lies you told" file. He has a talent for picking the best romantic cards, the kind the make you cry and then kiss. You know the kind. Every time she gets one like that from him, I want her to think of all the ones that he gave ME. And how they didn't mean anything.

[This message edited by gypsybird87 at 7:52 PM, February 8th (Saturday)]

unfortunately, my wrist by hitting a fence post when I really wanted to hit my WH.

My IC recommended boxing classes to help me with my rage, but also to help me learn to hit correctly so I don't break anything else! Lol!