Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Starrystarrynight

General :
Ask the menz...

This Topic is Archived
default

katiescarlett ( member #43399) posted at 1:20 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Can two angry men really get into a physical fight and be okay with each other when it's over?

As a woman who holds deep grudges that is unbelievable to me.

MH-27
MH-28
3 boys
My D-Day July 2014 and numerous others.
His D-Day 8-20-14

posts: 155   ·   registered: May. 11th, 2014
id 6847809
default

Maxiom ( member #26001) posted at 1:29 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Lived it. So yes. He's still a douche , but we get along.

ETA: I went to a wedding last year and the groom and his best man got in a nasty fight just after high school. They hated each other pretty much through senior year.. got in a nasty fight the night of prom. They were friendly about a month or so after and have been best of friends since about a year after the fight.

[This message edited by Maxiom at 7:32 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]

posts: 471   ·   registered: Oct. 28th, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6847819
default

h0peless ( member #36697) posted at 1:40 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Can two angry men really get into a physical fight and be okay with each other when it's over?

A few of my closest friendships (with guys I've been friends with since elementary and middle school, haven't been in a fight since I was 14) started that way, so yeah. If it doesn't get physical, there is usually resentment but there is a respect factor that comes into play after a physical fight.

[This message edited by h0peless at 7:41 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]

posts: 3136   ·   registered: Sep. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: Baja Arizona
id 6847827
default

StillGoing ( member #28571) posted at 1:42 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Can two angry men really get into a physical fight and be okay with each other when it's over?

Depends. The asshole that was shouting obscenities at my wife? No, if it had got to a fighting stage, I'd have beaten him badly enough to make sure he never tried to do any damn thing remotely hostile again, and I'd go revisit it on him if he did.

Two friends, sure. Two guys that barely know each other and get into it over a misunderstanding that gets cleared up, and they're both otherwise reasonable, that's kind of how a lot of long term friendships actually start. I dunno. Some kind of weird fucking bonding ritual or something, maybe.

Tempus Fuckit.

- Ricky

posts: 7918   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2010   ·   location: USA
id 6847828
default

HeartFullOfHoles ( member #42874) posted at 1:51 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

One woman with curvature in the right places and who isn't young enough to be my daughter is perfect in my book. Being given the privilege to explore the derivatives of a womans body is always an enjoyable/sensual experience.

A power washer is nice, but does require maintenance.

Not much sports watching for me. I prefer to do things instead of watch someone else do something.

Yes we can pee sanding up, but you have boobs .

My WW loves to gamble and I basically hate it. I see it as a waste of money, she sees it as fun. Of course she doesn't have to work to pay for her loses so it's probably a little easier for her to enjoy it for that reason.

For some of us the anger burns hot, but is short lived/dissipates quickly. Yes there can be some residual tension, but we often do actually get over it. Welcome to the world of excess testosterone.

BH - Tried to R for too long, now happily divorced
D-Day 4/28-29/2012 (both 48 at the time)
Two adult daughters

posts: 782   ·   registered: Mar. 24th, 2014
id 6847835
default

katiescarlett ( member #43399) posted at 1:57 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Welcome to the world of excess testosterone

I have 3 sons, a husband, and a male dog. I've lived in that world for awhile now.

MH-27
MH-28
3 boys
My D-Day July 2014 and numerous others.
His D-Day 8-20-14

posts: 155   ·   registered: May. 11th, 2014
id 6847842
default

CheaterMagnet ( member #33581) posted at 1:57 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Of course she doesn't have to work to pay for her loses so it's probably a little easier for her to enjoy it for that reason.

So, raising the kids and keeping the house isn't work? Or do you have full time nannies, maids, chauffers and a personal chef?

[This message edited by CheaterMagnet at 8:01 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]

If Happy Ever After did exist, I would still be holding you like this.
All those fairly tales are full of shit.
One more fucking love song I'll be sick. ~ Maroon 5

posts: 1968   ·   registered: Oct. 11th, 2011
id 6847843
default

simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 2:08 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

This thread keeps getting better and better. I love the honesty and creative ways the menz are responding. It also just solidifies (besides the obvious reasons) that I totally suck at picking men.

The menz of SI rock!!

Because I don't believe anything Cosmo says... Here's a question.

What is one thing a partner can do to completely turn a man on?

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

posts: 6121   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2009   ·   location: In the darkest depths of hell!
id 6847853
default

saturnpatrick ( member #35989) posted at 2:12 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

I get turned on when I'm wanted.

Wife can do 'XYZ', and if she and I just got back from a great date and she's got that look in her eye, I'm ready as hell.

Meanwhile, wife can do same 'XYZ', and if she's kind of tired and cranky and maybe seems like she doesn't want to, I feel like a big inconvenience and would rather just go do something else.

[This message edited by saturnpatrick at 8:13 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]

BH I edit.

posts: 251   ·   registered: Jul. 1st, 2012
id 6847857
default

HeartFullOfHoles ( member #42874) posted at 2:19 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Of course she doesn't have to work to pay for her loses so it's probably a little easier for her to enjoy it for that reason.

So, keeping the house and raising the children doesn't count as working? Or do you have full time nannies, maids and a personal chef?

Note I did say pay. I'm going to ignore the rest of the implication because you don't know my situation and I don't want to hijack the thread.

BH - Tried to R for too long, now happily divorced
D-Day 4/28-29/2012 (both 48 at the time)
Two adult daughters

posts: 782   ·   registered: Mar. 24th, 2014
id 6847867
default

yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 2:22 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

What is one thing a partner can do to completely turn a man on?

When she looks at me.

Breathes the same air as me.

When she comes within 6 feet of me.

Seriously I think it depends on the guy. For me as you can tell from the above statements I'm pretty easy. Sometimes I really like it when the woman plays the aggressor. Like I'm her property or something. That works the other way too.

Mostly, for me, is when a woman is very comfortable in her own sexuality and just wants to have fun. That is 100% the biggest turn on for me. Because as long as it's fun, anything goes within the boundaries of what you both consider fun.

[This message edited by yearsofpain25 at 8:24 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]

"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

posts: 4519   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Northeast US
id 6847870
default

h0peless ( member #36697) posted at 2:23 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

What is one thing a partner can do to completely turn a man on?

I imagine it varies from man to man, but just seeing my ex in lingerie triggered something primal in me.

posts: 3136   ·   registered: Sep. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: Baja Arizona
id 6847871
default

Tred ( member #34086) posted at 2:25 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

What is one thing a partner can do to completely turn a man on?

Depends on my mood really. Anything from be available to give me a full body massage with oil. But usually a no fail is just flirting and innuendo as a lead up. Playful, hints, make me laugh. It's really not that hard. Just my opinion.

Married: 27 years (14 @JFO) D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

posts: 5890   ·   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2011
id 6847875
default

HeartFullOfHoles ( member #42874) posted at 2:35 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

I think it depends on the man. Lingerie is great, but feeling loved, appreciated and respected (the emotional connection) is a significant booster for any situation. I personally enjoy the seduction side of things and the right lingerie does that for me in spades (a slit here, a low cut there, a barely coverer/sheer everywhere). Add an open back and I'm putty.

BH - Tried to R for too long, now happily divorced
D-Day 4/28-29/2012 (both 48 at the time)
Two adult daughters

posts: 782   ·   registered: Mar. 24th, 2014
id 6847881
default

RidingHealingRd ( member #33867) posted at 2:43 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

don't you think that fantasy is equally strong that women fantasize about two men??

Ick to ^^^ Never in my lifetime.

ME: 60 BS
HIM: 67 WH
Married: 35 years
D'Day: 10/29/10
in R 10 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.

The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.

posts: 2519   ·   registered: Nov. 9th, 2011
id 6847892
default

PurpleRose ( member #33129) posted at 3:10 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

My WW loves to gamble and I basically hate it. I see it as a waste of money, she sees it as fun. Of course she doesn't have to work to pay for her loses so it's probably a little easier for her to enjoy it for that reason.

Say what now???

Please explain, because unless you are kidless, homeless, and she is a lazy oaf- well I will take issue with this viewpoint. Please show me what I'm missing...

divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...

posts: 3871   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2011   ·   location: Happyville
id 6847931
default

ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 3:34 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

I wanted to be a homemaker like my mom, but I've had a job since high school without any breaks besides maternity leave. As a gambler, I do think this is an advantage as I know the value of a dollar.

My mom was a homemaker, and of course she "earned" money too, but no one ever put a dollar amount on it, so I think I'm a way better gambler than her. You have to know when to quit..

My mom shouldn't have just taken a bunch of my dad's hard-earned money and go gamble it if she wasn't smart about it or knew exactly where the money stood.

And you do play better poker when you are gambling with your own hard-earned money. Playing with other people's money makes you way looser with it, and the losses DO NOT feel as bad when you are playing with someone else's money.

Yes, a marriage is a team, and all money should be shared money, but money used for gambling should be taken seriously and agreed upon between the marriage partners. It should be looked at as a waste of money. And if you happen to win, great.

xBW~ 40
Two DS~ 15 and 11

posts: 3123   ·   registered: Feb. 6th, 2013   ·   location: Flat Earth
id 6847967
default

silverhopes ( member #32753) posted at 3:43 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

OK I haz a question:

WWE… What appeals to you the most about it?

Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.

posts: 5270   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6847976
default

saturnpatrick ( member #35989) posted at 3:58 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

Sometimes I think the money thing is more about both people not having a clear picture.

Once upon a time, back when me and W's M was not as rosy, there was a time when money was very, VERY tight. I was fretting about it pretty much every day.

I would try to talk to W about it, but she didn't like the topic so would get angry and break off the conversation and basically bury her head in the sand. So I took things upon myself.

I took on a second job. Clipped coupons like mad. I remember I wanted a $15 part from the hardware store for a project I wanted to work on (which I had long postponed due to money issues). This was my source of fun, but I choose not to purchase the part because our financial situation was not good. I bought absolutely nothing for myself. NOTHING. I would sit at the store and dream of how nice it would be to buy and enjoy a game or movie. I even started skipping meals to try to save money.

Then, even when I asked her not to, she went and contracted out some folks to put in a fence at our yard to the tune of over 5K. I had told her we couldn't afford to hire someone to do it. I said I would do it. She totally disregarded that. Threw it right on top of already mounting credit card debt to the tune of around 20%.

We're still paying off that debt. Through some fortune I have doubled my income since then, but even with double income we are now finally starting to break even on our payments.

When money was that tight, and my W didn't seem to care, everything felt like throwing money away to me. It definitely felt like I was doing all the work, not just the earning, but also the work to cut costs, making sacrifices, etc.

I don't know FullOfHoles sitch, but I think there are some cases where spending money can be an extremely touchy subject.

BH I edit.

posts: 251   ·   registered: Jul. 1st, 2012
id 6847994
default

silverhopes ( member #32753) posted at 4:04 AM on Wednesday, June 25th, 2014

I think there are some cases where spending money can be an extremely touchy subject.

Definitely true.

Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.

posts: 5270   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6848002
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy