SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

((DTTC))

Somedays it feels like giving her full custody would of been a whole lot easier than this 50/50 split with a schedule that strains my work life, what little social life I have and my mental health. Grrr.

You would regret it deeply in the long run.

monster changes the schedule on me all the time. I see any extra time with my girls as a win. Its hard fitting it all on and I'm stressed to my eyeballs financially but.... I am no longer being cheated on, I am doing this, I'm building a better life for me and my girls. Maybe not financially but emotionally.

Is there any way you can adjust your work schedule? Either now or in future? I know its easier said than done but somethings got to give - never your kids.

This gets me through the tough times.

It would suck arse to have to give money to the person who blew up my family. monster hates that he has to give me $8k per year. And HE's the one that blew up my family.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 1:41 AM, December 23rd (Sunday)]

Enjoy this Goo Goo Dolls song...Better Days. It is on my Rebuilding Mix.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-kHleNYIDc Cheers!

It would suck arse to have to give money to the person who blew up my family. monster hates that he has to give me $8k per year. And HE's the one that blew up my family.

It does suck and I haven't even started paying yet. But I have a good idea of what that number is going to be and it is not even remotely fair. I get to pay to endorse her lifestyle. She's doesn't need all that money to help raise the kids in reality. But the legal system will give her what she is entitled to, not what she truly deserves and that is a shame.

I'm still not sure how any BS who is the breadwinner is able to write that check each month without a lot of anger. Maybe it goes away over time, we shall see. But for now I will feel the anger and hate whenever I write that check.

I knew this part was going to be the hardest aside from the actual finding out about the affair. I get pissed almost daily thinking about it, I try not to talk to her because all I want to do is yell at her and accuse her of gold digging and being a greedy, insensitive, lying, selfish bitch. Just burns me. I held onto a lot of our cash in hopes of just paying her off and holding onto more of it, but looks like that won't happen. I should of spent it. Of course I can still play hard ball with the attorneys and then she can spend her part on her attorney.

SBB - while I have only considered giving her full custody, I have not truly gotten there in my mind. I would miss my kids too much. That being said, I had considered a move out of state and re-building with a fresh start. That would turn into a major battle and getting custody would be virtually impossible. But something I have seriously considered for my own sanity as much as anything.

So I have "a feeling" she is going to file for custody support and alimony pende lite. I have told her all along if she files it will upset me as I have been working with my attorney to put together a fair deal. One in which she can still lead her perfect life of working part time, see the kids 50% and have time to run to all her social events, weekends away with the OM, etc. Meanwhile I will have to re-organize finances, re-finance mortgage to try and hold onto the house to keep my kids in the school district in the house they feel comfortable in. Plus watch her drain out some of my retirement. So I have to talk to my attorney and see what we do if she files for support before we get an offer to her. I may choose to just pay her monthly charge and not do another thing with the D. Make her move it forward and pay for it (with the money I make). I told her time and time again for us to work this out and save us both attorney fees but she apparently does not want to listen. So this will inevitably cost us and our kids in the end. So tired of this stupidity, selfishness and you might as well add greed to the list.