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Off Topic :
Background and a mojo request

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frustrated

 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 5:38 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

The last three weeks have been hell. To make a long LONG LONG story marginally shorter...

1. When DD "fell" and hurt her sacrum three weeks ago, it was because she was lowering herself out her 2nd story bedroom window, trying to run away from an explosive episode during which she attacked me and pushed me through a glass door. (I wasn’t injured.)

2. She ended up being transported by ambulance (with me), spent a night on a trauma ward being observed for spinal damage, and then a week on a child psychiatric ward.

3. The psychiatrist in the ER called DHS to open a report against me for denial of care. The DHS case worker was/is wonderful. She interviewed my DD in the hospital and then me over the phone the next day.

4. After being released from the hospital, DD spent the next two weeks in a youth home (temporary shelter) 45 minutes from home, since it was clear that it was not safe to have her in the house with me given her violence toward me and her dangerous impulsivity. I saw her every day at the shelter, and brought her home for the day during the weekends to avoid her having to spend unstructured time with the other residents, who were several years older than DD and came from very rough backgrounds (think gang affiliations).

5. During one of those weekend days at home, she accidentally cut her hand on a piece of glass, and we ended up back in the ER for 5 stitches.

6. As all this was going down, my Dad was admitted to the hospital in my hometown and we discovered he has congestive heart failure on top of his inoperable kidney cancer.

Still with me?

7. I posted a few days ago that we found out DD has been accepted to a residential treatment program and will be moving there within the next few weeks. She'll spend somewhere between 3 months and a year in the program, getting much needed psychiatric and medical therapies.

8. DD came home from the shelter Friday night (her allotted time ran out), so as a safety measure, I asked Wasband to stay here in the spare bedroom so there is another responsible adult on hand in case she has another explosive episode before a bed becomes available at the residential program. If something does blow up, he can help defuse the situation and/or call 911 as needed.

9. Just got off the phone with the DHS worker. She is coming over this afternoon to meet one more time with DD and then give me the outcome of the investigation. Even though I’m expecting it to be “unfounded,” I’m nervous. I’d be crazy to not be nervous.

So I’m asking for some mojo, positive thoughts, or anything else you’ve got on several fronts. In no particular order:

A. Swift placement for my DD in the residential program.

B. Heart/kidney mojo for my Dad.

C. An “unfounded” finding in the DHS investigation.

D. A short, effective, and cooperative engagement with wasband staying here.

E. A way to retain/regain my sanity through all this.

TIA

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6271823
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Lucky2HaveMe ( member #13333) posted at 5:44 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

All my mojo and good thoughts coming your way!

Love isn't what you say, it's what you do.

posts: 8488   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2007   ·   location: WNY
id 6271831
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lost_in_toronto ( member #25395) posted at 5:46 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Mojomojomojo headed your way.

(((NIK)))

Hang in there, hon. Best of luck with everything on your plate.

Me: BS/48
Him: WS/46
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 23 years.
Reconciled.

posts: 1806   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2009   ·   location: not toronto anymore
id 6271835
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MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 5:48 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Sending all the mojo I have, NIK

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6271841
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SouthernGal ( member #27315) posted at 5:53 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

NIK -

Sending up thoughts and mojo for you!

And a few cyber hugs to keep on hand for when you feel like you need one!

BS (Me) XWH (him) M nearly 16 yrs
1 DD (teens)
D-day #1 12/09, #2 2/10
Divorced 10/6/10

posts: 3862   ·   registered: Jan. 22nd, 2010   ·   location: The Deep (Fried) South
id 6271849
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 6:11 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Good thoughts, prayers, mojo--whatever you need!

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6271881
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sullymeishadomi ( member #16305) posted at 6:18 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Sending all possible mojo and a big ass ((hug)).

Out here DHS is called dyfus. I had two experiences with them. The first was frightening. Both turned out okay. From how you explained your initial meeting with the lady, Im guessing all will go well.

Mojo...knock on wood...tap iron....

Time to be my own bff.

posts: 9311   ·   registered: Sep. 22nd, 2007   ·   location: NJ
id 6271895
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stroppy_wanadoo ( member #11224) posted at 6:20 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Mojo, hugs and tons of peaceful thoughts headed your way.

posts: 1175   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2006
id 6271900
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stillstrong ( member #36144) posted at 6:23 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Sending mojo NIK. And hugs.

((((NIK))))

Me BS 47
Him WS 51
DDay LTA Feb 21, 2006
R until DDay 2EA's 1/31/12 ONS 2/5/12 Broken NC 7/12/12
Moved out 9/12
Legally Separated 3/13

posts: 848   ·   registered: Jul. 16th, 2012
id 6271906
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simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 6:25 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Wow, that's a lot for anyone to deal with.

Sending prayers and mojo your way.

(((HUGS)))

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

posts: 6121   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2009   ·   location: In the darkest depths of hell!
id 6271910
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 6:46 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Thank you, guys.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6271969
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itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 6:54 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Sending mojo...

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6271986
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 7:01 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

~~~~MOJO~~~~ for all of your needs!

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5648   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 6272007
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 7:04 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

(((NIK and family)))

Sending mojo, good thoughts, prayers, and love.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6272015
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Tred ( member #34086) posted at 7:06 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Damn NIK - you can have all my mojo. It's like frequent flyer miles, never use it

Married: 27 years (14 @JFO) D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

posts: 5890   ·   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2011
id 6272018
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bbee ( member #17840) posted at 7:09 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Mojo!

This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

All's Well That Ends Well, Act I, Scene 1

posts: 6681   ·   registered: Jan. 21st, 2008   ·   location: SE US
id 6272028
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 9:52 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

C. An “unfounded” finding in the DHS investigation.

The caseworker just left. Unfounded!!! Woo hoo!!!!

Final report will be mailed out next week, but the case is closed and found to be without merit.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6272326
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Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 10:28 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

Sooo, when do you get your "We were idiots and this was without merit" compensation check?!?!

Rats.

On a sunshiney note I'm thrilled that justice prevailed here - what a nightmare coated nightmare.

All the hugs in the world to you, loves.

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

posts: 29076   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6272384
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gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 10:47 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

{{{{NIK}}}}

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6272410
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hexed ( member #19258) posted at 11:24 PM on Monday, March 25th, 2013

(((NIK)))

so many good vibes going out to you. that is just waaaay too much!

But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler

posts: 9609   ·   registered: Apr. 24th, 2008
id 6272467
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