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It's the end of the school year. I want to kill my students. Kill them. You know what drives me nuts about this age group? That they lie. They lie big... and then they are indignent that you don't believe them. Just today:'

"Why didn't you come see me to talk about this earlier?"

"I tried to come by during [office hours] but you weren't here."

"Um... yes, I was. I was actually even here early and late because I needed to do additional work."

"NO you weren't. I came by and the door was locked and the lights were off."

"That's not true. I was here and meeing with xxxx student."

Then they are indignant that they don't get an extension because they *tried* to come and tlak to me but I wasn't there. Sure they could have emailed, called, texted, skyped, whatevs, but nope - I wasn't there. And guess who then follows up to accuse me of not supporting little johnny or jenny?

"Little johnny told me you wouldn't give him an extension. He tried to come get help three times but you were not there!"

On top of that, it's like I'm trying to manage a zoo. "Why do we still have to learn new material? There's two weeks left!"

"Exactly, there's two weeks left."

On top of that, two plagiarism cases.

I'm making xanax cookies. It's up in the air who is gonna get those xanax cookies but someone is.

((((hurtbs)))) Sending you end of year strength. Think of summer... think of summer...

You can make xanax cookies?

You'd think it would be easier as they get older. Nope. I teach college and this is what they sound like.

"I just now read the part in the syllabus about having to do ____ and I didn't and want to know can I still do it, even though it was due 2 months ago? No?? Well that's really crappy."

"What can I do for extra credit?"--These are the same students who didn't do the ASSIGNED work and now they want to do extra work for credit.

"I'm missing several grades--I turned stuff in but you didn't ever give it back to me." Yeah, right--sure you turned it in.

"I think I should get some points because I turned it in on time." Of course what was turned in was rubbish.

"You didn't tell us about that." Umm, yes I did. At least five times. I did everything but jump up on the desk and do a fire dance to make you pay attention.

Thank GOD it's almost over.

I'm seriously going to invent valium spray that can be sold in individual cannisters like mace as well as big industrial drums full of the stuff that can be pumped through the air vents.

Oh yeah Meanie. I taught college for 10 years before switching to high school. I miss when it was illegal for their parents to contact me...

What, no points for their creativity??? KIDDING.

Don't make the cookies tempting though it may be, I don't want to see you on a Lifetime movie...(I do realize you are joking)

I have an adult college student who is like this. Fifty years old, what a bozo. Today he told me that the rules and requirements infantilize students.

Bwahahahaha!

I'll tell you what's infantile, buster...

Alas, I remained professional and merely said, "I'm so sorry you feel that way."

I am SO glad I'm not the only one banging my head on the desk these days. Seriously they are driving me to drink. Even more than I'm used to.

ETA--And you are SO right--at least I don't have to deal with PITA parents. Not that they don't try.

[This message edited by meaniemouse at 10:18 PM, May 6th (Monday)]

It's not just the college kids.. My fourth graders are completely losing it. Now that our state testing has passed, and even though we have over a month left before school gets out, they don't understand why we have to keep doing work.

But the tests are over!

But we are done!

But we shouldn't have to do more work- we already did a lot of work!!

Is it summer yet??

[This message edited by PurpleRose at 10:23 PM, May 6th (Monday)]

I never taught in grad school, but I heard the fact that it is technically illegal for you to divulge information to parents of undergrads, it doesn't stop some parents from trying. Or showing up to office hours. Or calling the Dean.

I taught middle school, 6-8, before becoming a SAHM. They are the reason I went gray at 22.

You people are the reason I nurse the infantile in corporate America instead of America's classrooms.

God bless you all. I'll take infants in boardrooms over infants in school.

My favourite was this:

Student: I don't understand why you gave me a 60% on my report card. I got 100% on everything.

Me: But you didn't hand in a lot of work. You may have gotten 100% on the things you handed in, but you got 0% on the things you didn't.

Student: *shrugs as me as if to say "so what???*

Then she went home and posted all over Facebook (as reported to me by other students) that I was a horrible teacher and gave her 60% even though she got 100% on everything.

What makes it worse for us right now is that this is the first week where we've had really nice weather. If I hear "Can we have class outside today?" one more time, I'm gonna jump out my second storey window...

((((Teachers))))

Dibs on the cookies...

((hugs)) for all you do for the kids.

Ah, yes. This is when the parents come out of the woodwork (after we sent home progress reports, emails, sometimes even a personal letter home) and ask, "What can he do to pass?"

What can he do? The work. All year long.

My students also like to sidle up to me sheepishly in June, asking, "Is there anything I can do to bring my grade up?"

What can you do? The work. All year long.

As for extra credit, I rarely offer it anymore. I'm sick of kids pinning their hopes on it and thinking that I'm going to offer some kind of 500 extra credit point project that consists of them pretending to read a book and writing half a paragraph on it.

I feel for teachers I really do, I think that they have been coerced into a method of teaching that encourages mediocrity, and irresponsibility.

Start T/J

When I was in school you were rewarded when you were the best, and it was always a challenge to be the best. Now everyone gets a trophy for participating mindset, prevents the schools from rewarding the kids that are doing the work, and making the grades.

The other issue I have is they allow kids to turn in "late work" all the way through middle school, and some allow it in Honors High School classes. This just encourages kids to not get the stuff done.

When I was in school assignments were due on the date provided. If you didn't have it too bad. That big ole 0 on your grade sheet woke you the heck up.

Now they can ladeda it when something is due. This does NOT HELP kids with ADHD. This does not help them learn to be organized and responsible.

Our district took away any rewards that the good/smart kids were recieving, for reasons that are unclear. Oh sure the athletes get recognition, but God forbid we recognize the kids that are going to be the ones that do something important with their lives.

End T/J

I nurse the infantile in corporate America

Hey - me too. And I'm looking for a source for desktop valium salt licks.

I nurse the infantile in corporate America

same here..Although, I do teach adjunct from time to time and I experienced the same. It was beyond frustrating.

When I was in school assignments were due on the date provided. If you didn't have it too bad. That big ole 0 on your grade sheet woke you the heck up.

Now they can ladeda it when something is due. This does NOT HELP kids with ADHD. This does not help them learn to be organized and responsible.

I spend 2+ hours a day keeping my ADD son on task. The 0 doesn't help anyone but me. It cuts down on my stress of dealing with homework.

Kids with ADD are not going to learn how to be organized and responsible in the same way kids without ADD do. I understand it must be frustrating but it's frustrating for parents trying to work with it, too.

I wish they'd give him trig problems and have him do reports on Harry Potter, but they won't. They're just going to fail him because I can't be available 5 nights a week to keep him focused. He has improved dramatically but this environment does not suit him and it's coming to the point where I am seriously considering taking a pay hit to wfh full time to home school him.

After months of dealing with the administration he was put in an Extended Learning Program which I was assured would help him with his homework, but he comes home 2 or 3 days of the week with it half done or not done at all, which means I get to either keep him on task until 7 while I'm working, getting dinner ready and herding the household until my wife comes home, or let him fail on the 0.

Our younger son has no issue with this stuff and at age 6 knocks it all out on his own in 15 minutes.

I honestly don't know what to do. It is exhausting. Right now I am hoping he just skates through on D's for the next 6 or 7 years until he can get his GED and move on to junior college.