in all fairness, it wasn't all romance that caused me to do the household chores
And this is what makes it so romantic, it was just you being you no agenda.
First, I love to cook. And I love growing my garden and cooking from it's produce. I make an awesome salsa!
You love to cook!? Excuse me while I finish choking on my lunch.
Wow, amazing. You have all of us females in awe and admiration.
And you gardent too????? Oh, hells no, BTW nobody makes a better salsa than me. Guacamole for that matter too!
Look, Justjim, Both my STBXWH and I retired from the military as well. He was still a freaking slob and lazy as hell at home. Oh, don't get me wrong, he put on a great show for others. He would call in to work and tell them I had to go to the hospital or I was sick. They all thought he was so wonderful and attentive. First off, he wouldn't go with me to the hospital (I had to take myself or call an ambulance) and as for taking care of me, if you call sitting in front of the tv and watching football or playing football madden as taking care of his sick wife, yeah, he was fantastic.
I simply remained consistent. It was no big deal, I like to be busy anyway.
Wow, codependent like crazy. Dude, you completely sell yourself so short. What the hell did your wife do? Think on it. What if you read this coming from some women talking about her husband. Would that give you a little more clarity.
I'm telling you that you are me. I worked more hours than him. I would rush to the commissary on my lunch hour and get groceries (4 teenagers in the house) almost EVERY day! Then after a 12 hour shift, give counselings for work performance to my Soldiers. I had to rush home in traffic and run in the house, unload all the groceries because the kids were at their respective sports practices and he sat on his ass (again football Madden). I would scrounge for cutlery and start cutting, dicing, sauteing, whatever. Dinner had to be ready, dishes had to be washed. Had to help the youngest (ADHD) with his comprehension of his assignments. THEN I would start my homework (around 2200) for my classes.
Weekends were crazy too because I was doing everything for 4 teenagers and a big lazy adult.
So while I'm here rambling, my point is, don't sell yourself so short. I would have loved loved loved for my husband to just lift a finger once in a while.
Maybe there is some validity to her complaints that I didn't take enough time for her, that I didn't talk with her enough.
I'm throwing the BS card down, yet again this week! Yep, asshat said the same thing. That he wasn't important to me because I was always ignoring him. Yep sure was while I was ironing his crap, picking up his Class A's from the cleaners helping him with writing his soldiers' awards or NCOERs. What the hell ever. Oh wait, I was raising HIS kids. He never took a single kid to ANY dr or dental appts. The kids and I did all of the yard work. I would have really liked to have had a garden, but no time quality management in the world was going to make that happen. I think I was getting about 4.5 hours of sleep 7 days a week for about 3 years at that point in the relationship.
Maybe we should have eaten a few more frozen pizzas in a dirty house with a yard that looks like hell.
Of course you could have ate crap all the time, but a soldier (or whatever service you were in) has to keep themselves up physically at all times.
I swear, I'm not trying to hit on you, but where the hell were you stationed at when I was single. I will never understand how selfish people seem to end up with the winners and people that deserve better end up with asswholes that cheat on them. Where is the balance?