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Off Topic :
one year ago right now

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 welcome14 (original poster member #26741) posted at 5:32 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

I was at my good friend's bedside. She had been diagnosed with glioblastoma multiforme- an aggressive brain tumor in August. She was barely responsive, horribly swollen, and the tumor had sucked the personality out of her.

Every year, in their 39 years marriage, she and her husband hosted Christmas Eve for friends and family. Everyone pitched in to make sure it happened last year, I made a beef dip that my late mama made every Christmas, that my friend also made. No one else I have ever met makes it. I ate, shared camaraderie, and finally forced myself to go to her bedside...it was so sad. She just wasn't present. I talked to her for a few minutes, and turned to leave. Started crying, and told her I loved her. She then turned, looked directly at me and said something. I couldn't understand her, but had to leave before I lost all control. I thought I would ask her another time. Stupid.

Got busy with Christmas, was going to see her New Year's day, but she died one minute into the New Year, surrounded by her hubby n 2 sons.

This woman dragged me kicking and screaming backwards through the thorny hedgerow of infidelity, back towards life. I would give anything to know what she said that night.

Moral? Don't put off for tomorrow that which you should do today.

2013, you have been a bitch motherfucker. Her death, loss of my 3 year new beginning relationship to the big I, and serious health issues, to include a broken shoulder 3 weeks ago, and estrangement of my DD and I from my DS, well, 2013, I will be glad to see you die.

vent over. thanks for your indulgence.

[This message edited by welcome14 at 11:35 PM, December 24th (Tuesday)]

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6610981
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AgainandAgain ( member #34835) posted at 6:20 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

((((((((((welcome))))))))))

I'm sitting here crying right now. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better but I know words are of no comfort.

Vent away. Getting out what you can can sometimes help a little. So many people are here to listen, lend an ear.

posts: 246   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012
id 6611020
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cinnamongurl ( member #37879) posted at 6:22 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

(((Welcome))) so sorry for your loss and your hellish year! May you find some peace (both within yourself, and in the rest of your life) this Christmas holiday and the coming new year!

Moral? Don't put off for tomorrow that which you should do today

^^this is so timely right now. Thanks for this!

~CG~

Me:FWS 42 He: FBS 43 and my heart
Together 22 years. We survived infidelity. "Healing takes courage, and we all have courage, even if we have to dig a little to find it." Tori Amos

CG

posts: 626   ·   registered: Dec. 22nd, 2012   ·   location: by the sea with my love
id 6611026
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 6:29 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

(((welcome)))

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6611032
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 welcome14 (original poster member #26741) posted at 6:39 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

Thank you so much all of you sweethearts. This is why SI rocks, cause only you guys get it. much luvs peeps! And Merry Christmas!

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6611039
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 welcome14 (original poster member #26741) posted at 6:39 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

dup/ dang, 2013, leave me alone!

[This message edited by welcome14 at 12:42 AM, December 25th (Wednesday)]

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6611040
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 6:48 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

Merry Christmas, welcome. I hope your 2014 is brighter and filled with joy.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6611049
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 11:15 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

((((welcome))))

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6611641
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jrc1963 ( member #26531) posted at 11:55 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013

(((Welcome)))

Here's to a kick-ass, awesome 2014!!!!

Me: BSO - 56 Him: FWSO - 79 DS - 23 D-Day - 12-11-09, R - he finally came homeYour life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

posts: 26375   ·   registered: Dec. 14th, 2009   ·   location: Michigan
id 6611662
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 welcome14 (original poster member #26741) posted at 5:57 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013

thanks again for listening and understanding. You all are always there to field anything I throw out. Bless this site. I shed a few more tears today and feel better. Thanks for the hugs. They help.

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6611971
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Violated ( member #21239) posted at 7:00 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2013

I bet she said she loves you too. Hugs

Divorced 10/2013

posts: 742   ·   registered: Oct. 14th, 2008   ·   location: West Coast
id 6612005
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persevere ( member #31468) posted at 1:04 AM on Friday, December 27th, 2013

(((welcome14))) I imagine it meant so much to your friend to have you there with her that night even if she didn't seem present. Treasure her memory.

Here's to 2014.

DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

posts: 5329   ·   registered: Mar. 9th, 2011
id 6612842
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 welcome14 (original poster member #26741) posted at 1:48 AM on Friday, December 27th, 2013

ty! yep, to 2014...may we all b blessed.

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6612906
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Tred ( member #34086) posted at 1:56 AM on Friday, December 27th, 2013

I would give anything to know what she said that night.

Maybe it was something like leave before you lose all control. It's one of the possibilities since you don't really know . Looking forward to 2014 as well.

Married: 27 years (14 @JFO) D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

posts: 5890   ·   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2011
id 6612914
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