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Divorce/Separation :
A good week

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 Pass (original poster member #38122) posted at 7:11 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

What's going on this week:

First:

13 has been in a "mini-enrichment" program at the university this week, so he is living with me for the week. The Princess tells me that she offered to let him stay with her for one of the weekends because she will miss not seeing him for two weekends (my usual time) plus a full week. She was quite shocked when he answered, "No way."

I would never encourage him to be rude to her, but I have to admit to finding joy in that response. She planted the seeds for that.

Second:

My sister from out west was here from Saturday to today. We drank a metric shitload of wine, and hung out with the kids. When we had time away from the kids, we bitched about The Princess.

Third:

Last night I took my sister and 13 to my weekly open stage. 13 got up on stage with me to do a couple songs, and totally nailed it. We were harmonizing, we were trading off lines and verses, we were frigging amazing - if I may say so.

That all adds up to a fantastic week. Now that my sister has moved on to our parents' farm, I get some time to hang out with just 13. He has requested a supper of ham and scrambled eggs tonight.

Then on Friday, his little brother gets back here for our usual weekend activity. 'Tis a good week. I've been needing one of these lately.

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6787935
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Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 7:30 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

AWESOME!!!!!!

And so good to read!

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6787962
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lieshurt ( member #14003) posted at 7:55 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

It's wonderful you all had a great time. Life really can be good

No one changes unless they want to. Not if you beg them. Not if you shame them. Not if you use reason, emotion, or tough love. There is only one thing that makes someone change: their own realization that they need to.

posts: 22643   ·   registered: Mar. 20th, 2007   ·   location: Houston
id 6787990
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 8:12 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

A good week, indeed!

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6788015
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7yrsflushed ( member #32258) posted at 8:44 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Woohoo! I am happy for you pass.

D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

posts: 2231   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2011   ·   location: VA
id 6788062
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MadeOfScars ( member #42231) posted at 8:46 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Awesome Pass! Thanks for sharing; you deserve it!

"Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t." - Steve Maraboli

posts: 3219   ·   registered: Jan. 27th, 2014   ·   location: Texas
id 6788069
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GreatRoleModel ( member #36809) posted at 8:53 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Nice...isn't it great when you can have a connected emotional time with your kids and there is no stress.

[This message edited by GreatRoleModel at 2:53 PM, May 6th, 2014 (Tuesday)]

BS (me)
XNPDWS
It takes a village to deal with the village idiot!
“If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane.”
― Robert Frost

posts: 493   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2012   ·   location: USA
id 6788075
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norabird ( member #42092) posted at 9:04 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Like!

Sit. Feast on your life.

posts: 4324   ·   registered: Jan. 16th, 2014   ·   location: NYC
id 6788087
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Gemini71 ( member #40115) posted at 11:09 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Definitely hitting the like button.

She was quite shocked when he answered, "No way."

Amazing how actions have consequences. Why on earth would anyone want to spend time with someone who threatens to stab them with a butter knife? Oh yeah, the Princess's Sh!t doesn't stink.

DSs 21, 16, 12
About my Ex:
IDK
IDC
IDGAF

Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014

posts: 3406   ·   registered: Jul. 30th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois, USA
id 6788245
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SBB ( member #35229) posted at 11:22 PM on Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Love good weeks! Soon it will be good months!

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

posts: 6062   ·   registered: Apr. 4th, 2012   ·   location: Australia
id 6788260
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sunsetslost ( member #39885) posted at 12:45 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

posts: 800   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2013   ·   location: The beach.
id 6788360
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PurpleRose ( member #33129) posted at 12:53 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

Sounds awesome!

divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...

posts: 3871   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2011   ·   location: Happyville
id 6788373
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 Pass (original poster member #38122) posted at 4:03 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

Thanks y'all!

And Gem gets the prize for observing something that The Princess will NEVER figure out:

Amazing how actions have consequences. Why on earth would anyone want to spend time with someone who threatens to stab them with a butter knife?

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6788570
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Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 4:57 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver

Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie

posts: 6709   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2010
id 6788619
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IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 5:26 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

Awesome week Pass

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

posts: 1858   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: WA
id 6788648
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myowndystopia ( member #41340) posted at 5:29 AM on Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

We drank a metric shitload of wine,

Kind of like the post card saying "wish you were here"

Glad you had some great time with sis. I think I'll text my brother and plan us a get together. Thank you Pass for sparking the idea!!!

Me- BS
Him - WS (the Grub)
married 28 years/4 kids(mostly grown)

"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true "
Set Fire to the Rain
Adele

posts: 408   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013
id 6788649
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Ashland13 ( member #38378) posted at 1:29 AM on Sunday, May 11th, 2014

Wanted to reply to the music part of your post, so awesome! It's amazing when one of our own interests clicks with our kids.

We are having similar experience here because my piano arrived yesterday, yay!

It takes up most of the living room but I couldn't part with it-it's an heirloom. I was so excited I wanted to share that it didn't get lost to divorce because of anon financial donor to move it.

So yesterday DD11 made a big mess of my books because she wanted to find her books from when I was teaching her a few years ago.

As the baby ages he can sit and play for minutes at a time, so I can bang something out if he sits where I can see him. We haven't gotten DD11's clarinet out-it's an apartment building with wood floors so loud, but is tempting.

And I, too, love when she makes fun of her father and OW-it's more and more often, though I do not encourage it, a good snicker now and again is pretty good. It's cool that they are starting to stand up for themselves and see the "forest through the trees". Kids are amazing little people...they are in there and always, always listening.

[This message edited by Ashland13 at 7:30 PM, May 10th (Saturday)]

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

posts: 3034   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: New England
id 6794020
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 Pass (original poster member #38122) posted at 3:36 AM on Sunday, May 11th, 2014

I'm so glad you have your piano, Ash. That's great!

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6794138
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