SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Dear OW,

I know that, once again, you have spent a great deal of time and energy finding me online, and that you are reading every word I post in this "anonymous" forum. I don't give a shit any more.

If reading about my pain gives you some kind of cheap thrill, read on. If reading about the "lies" I've told about you bothers you, stop reading. I don't care about you. I don't care what you do. I don't care what you say. You are a pathetic nobody, sad and broken and sick. You don't matter.

My spouse told you more than 2 months ago that it was over. He has not spoken to you since. Instead, he has recommitted himself to our relationship. He is working to fix what he broke. He loves me, and shows me that every day in every way he can. I may yet decide that what the two of you did to me is unforgiveable, and that I no longer wish to be married to him. Even if I do, he wants no part of you, ever again. On the other hand, we may end this crisis stronger than we started. Deal with it.

I am no longer afraid of you. I have a whole community of people, both here on this forum and in my real life, who have my back. I am bent but not broken. I am damaged but still whole. You have tainted my past but you cannot color my future. You have no power over me, try as you might.

If you wish to waste your time and energy stalking me, fine. I am happy to take up as much space in your damaged head as you wish to give me. Know that I will not be giving you any space in mine. Oh, and also know that if you continue, my husband will have the police on your doorstep. You may want to think about that before you make your next move.

I think we're all done here.

You go girl! I love the part that said you tainted my past but cannot color my future. That really hits home with me, what a great attitude. Thank you for sharing.

You, dear, are an amazing woman. I've been following you since you joined here (under a different name, right?) and I'm continually astounded by your grace and strength. You are remarkable. I'm even more proud of you today.

(((((krsplat)))))

How did OW *find* you here?

krsplat - You are my SHERO

This post has helped me more than any other I have read:

You have tainted my past but you cannot color my future. You have no power over me, try as you might

.

Rock on Krsplat. You are strong, smart, and capable, and the OW well she is just a sad shell of a woman.

Honestly if seeking you out here is the best she can do with her time, I ALMOST feel sorry for her.

You keep healing, you keep putting you first. YOU are the one who will come out of this shiny and renewed.

((((and strength))))

krsplat, I'm sorry you are experiencing this. It's unfortunate and creepy that it happens.

Another invasion by a sad pathetic person who chooses to live under a bridge. If they had the skills to create a positive life for themselves they wouldn't invest the time, effort and energy into finding you here. They must find you absolutely fascinating because you have things in life they don't have, like strength of character for one.

You will probably go through a range of emotions from anger to pity to indifference. And as said on this site over and over again and it's true, the AP is irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. You will find the support you need here. Keep posting. The best revenge is living well. You've got this.

Personally, it makes me think of a scene from What About Bob with Bill Murray and Richard Dryfess.

Dr. Leo Marvin: You think he's gone? He's not gone. That's the whole point! He's never gone!

[Leo opens the door; there's Bob]

Bob Wiley: Is this some radical new therapy?

Dr. Leo Marvin: YOU SEE?

Makes me every time.

Best wishes with your continued healing. It gets easier.

And of course stay safe because the crazies be crazy.

I know she recently showed up at your house with a box after having mailed your WH a letter.

Im guessing there was something in one of those that makes you think she has found you here?

Just know that she must be very bored with her own life if she has nothing better to do than follow the wife of a man who thinks she is trash and threw her under the bus.

Im sorry you're dealing with this.

Have you gone to the police yet? Showing up at your house in front of the school bus and your children is not ok...and she needs to be told so. Let the police handle it.

Yes, cease & desist was written up today and will be delivered tomorrow via process server. I will sleep much better now.

Better yet, my WH has really stepped up as a result of this mini-crisis and is demonstrating remorse and caring and kindness and protectiveness all over the place. I almost feel like I should thank her: I look so sane and welcoming in comparison to her crazy, and she's pushed the man she so desperately wants right into the arms of his family.

Now as to whether I am ready to keep him...

Yes, as shocking, unnerving and violating as it is, one upside is that a bunny-boiler AP can help catapult a remorseful wayward forward quickly and unwittingly help R along.

I hope my post didn't sound flippant because this is very serious. Finding some humor in a mountain of stupidity associated with it all helped me, but it didn't happen overnight.

Good luck with everything krsplat. You've found the best group no one wanted to join.

((((krsplat))))

The 'others' are nothing.

Good for you.