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I picked a fight with a bully

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earthangel ( member #44357) posted at 8:45 PM on Friday, April 8th, 2016

You're a good man, this isn't about revenge .... This is righting a wrong for your Dad !!

Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it’s bad - it's experience.

posts: 1103   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2014   ·   location: England
id 7524460
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ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 9:06 PM on Friday, April 8th, 2016

BEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!

Stay strong yop, pop the popcorn and watch the meltdown.

Stupid bitch, she didn't know well enough to fuck with YOP!!

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 7524475
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HobbesTheTiger ( member #41477) posted at 9:10 PM on Friday, April 8th, 2016

Awesome! So happy that the truth is coming to light!

posts: 3597   ·   registered: Nov. 28th, 2013
id 7524480
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Furious1 ( member #42970) posted at 10:21 PM on Friday, April 8th, 2016

WTG YOP!!!! I hope you get the police reports and documents that you need so that she will completely lose it over there. The more people that know what an absolute monster she is, the better. Let her try to pretend to be a good person and a loving wife now. If anyone has any common sense, they wouldn't get into a relationship with her ever.

BW (me): 46
2 adult kids
D-day: 10/4/13.
Divorced

posts: 7036   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: United States
id 7524529
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k8la ( member #38408) posted at 1:48 AM on Saturday, April 9th, 2016

You are also doing a favor to the next gent she tries to play up to - and you know she will.

posts: 1462   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2013
id 7524628
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 yearsofpain25 (original poster member #42012) posted at 1:11 PM on Saturday, April 9th, 2016

K8la

You are also doing a favor to the next gent she tries to play up to - and you know she will.

Already a factor in this. She has cheated on my father before. One that I know of for sure confirmed by my father. We (my step sister and I) suspect that she has been cheating again since before his accident. It would certainly explain some of her disappearances during that time. We know for a fact that her "new boyfriend" appeared back in Oct. Yes, my father passed away in August.

But hey, she started out in the relationship with my father was the OW. My father left my mother for this person. Part of him being an MH. Out of the frying pain and into the fire. My father really knew how to pick them. We had just started to talk about his A the last time I spoke to him before the accident. He was still blaming himself for my mother's A and he also said his biggest regret was starring one of his own. That he betrayed himself. Then he died before I could finish those conversations with him. I was starting to tell him everything that I learned here at SI.

Getting off track and I'm rambling again.

Yes, I'm sure her boyfriend probably heard all about how my father was the abuser and how much of an evil person he was. Just as I'm sure he's hearing the same about me. But this is some irrefutable and damning evidence to the contrary. Maybe he will get to see it. Maybe not. This guy I'm sure knew about stepmomster being married to my father so as far as I'm concerned they can have each other. Sounds like a match made in heave.

yop

"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

posts: 4519   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Northeast US
id 7524818
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william ( member #41986) posted at 11:55 PM on Saturday, April 9th, 2016

great job yop. im proud of the stand you took!

me - bh
her - lara01

from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA

??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys

posts: 2162   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2014
id 7525143
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antlered ( member #46011) posted at 12:20 AM on Sunday, April 10th, 2016

My God you are fighting the fight. Whatever the outcome, you've won in my book. You are a hero!

"Being cheated on was at once the worst and best thing that has ever happened to me.

"There is a huge amount of strength to be had from walking the path of integrity."

posts: 1297   ·   registered: Dec. 18th, 2014
id 7525154
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sparkysable ( member #3703) posted at 9:04 PM on Monday, April 11th, 2016

Just came across this! BRAVO!

Let me know the court details when you get them

D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

posts: 5718   ·   registered: Mar. 8th, 2004   ·   location: NY
id 7526523
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Shockedmom ( member #44708) posted at 9:21 PM on Monday, April 11th, 2016

In a legal battle with my dad's widow. It really isn't about the money, I want justice for my dad. He trusted her and his accountant and they have been pillaging the estate. Public exposure and potential elder abuse charges are the goal. Glad you are outraged and fighting the fight. Best luck.

posts: 1094   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2014   ·   location: Hawaii
id 7526543
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 yearsofpain25 (original poster member #42012) posted at 8:12 PM on Friday, April 29th, 2016

I received copies this week of the police files that were subpoenaed. Nothing in there I didn't expect. Police were there 9 times in the past 4 years. Doesn't include the times before the past 4 years. Clearly Stepmomster's mental illness/sociopath is front and center in this those reports including the time she tried to stab him. I know of a lot of other stuff that went on that wasn't documented as well. I can't even imagine all the stuff in between those police visits but it's safe to say that my father was abused daily in one form or another. My heart just breaks for him.

I would have loved to have been there when she had to explain these police reports to her lawyer. I have no doubt step momster never thought these reports would see the light of day anywhere. Here I am holding yet another bag of dicks feeling a mixture of sadness for my father and being pissed at step momster. I am getting satisfaction over exposing what she did to at least the people involved in this case so far.

Another bullshit move that was one of step momsters favorites to play was threatening suicide. She has yet to do it again after I shut that shit down while my father was in ICU as far as I know. I can only imagine that she used it on my father all the time. My brother, his son, committed suicide. Can you imagine how that threat must have made my father feel?

I would like to dedicate the song Powder Burns to step momster as she gets burned with her own actions. For those who don't know what a powder burn is...

Powder burn definition:

A powder burn is a type of burn caused by exposure to the burning gases which are expelled from the muzzle of a firearm as it is fired.[1] Powder burns only occur when the person or item to be burned is close to the discharging firearm, as the gases quickly dissipate.[2] This can be an indicator on a corpse of whether the person was shot at point-blank range or not.

Powder Burns by The Twilight Singers

I am a fire starter, no ventilation, now I'm kneeling

As the smoke is swallowing

No need for water, darling, I'm dedicated to a feeling

I can't help but following

A slow roulette, a sweet duet

I can't forget, I'm tryin'

Feel the powder burn, tonight, tonight

There'll be nowhere to turn, it's alright, alright

And I burn, and I want that feeling again

I hear somebody calling

And now the fire's in the ceiling

There's no way to stop it now

A silhouette, of sweet regret

I can't forget, I'm tryin'

Feel the powder burn, tonight, tonight

There'll be nowhere to turn, it's alright, alright

And I burn, and no one can see me

And I yearn 'cuz I want that feeling again

A cigarette, the fuse is lit, I can't forget, I'm tryin'

Feel the powder burn, tonight, tonight

There'll be no self control, it's alright, alright

And I burn, and no one can see me tonight, tonight

And I yearn 'cuz I want that feeling, tonight, tonight, tonight

yop

"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

posts: 4519   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Northeast US
id 7542946
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Crushed7 ( member #41129) posted at 8:49 PM on Friday, April 29th, 2016

It is awesome to see the karma bus rolling along while your step momster had no idea of what was about to hit her. What is really touching is that you are standing up for your dad and his memory after he suffered so much at her hands. I wish there were "thumbs up" icons, so I could put a row of them in here.

[This message edited by Crushed7 at 2:52 PM, April 29th (Friday)]

Me-BH
Her-WW
Last DDay-2012 (several month EA/PA)
Married 30+ years

posts: 3797   ·   registered: Oct. 27th, 2013
id 7542988
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devotedman ( member #45441) posted at 8:59 PM on Friday, April 29th, 2016

You might be holding bag of dicks but the way that you're wielding it it seems to give +10 TO-HIT.

Me: 2xBS b 1962 xWW after 2 decades, xWGF after almost 1.
Amelia Pond: Who are you?
The Doctor: I don't know yet. I'm still cooking.
ENFP-A. Huh.

posts: 5155   ·   registered: Oct. 30th, 2014   ·   location: Central USA
id 7542997
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devotedman ( member #45441) posted at 8:59 PM on Friday, April 29th, 2016

Sigh, bitten by the double-post bug.

[This message edited by devotedman at 5:28 AM, April 30th, 2016 (Saturday)]

Me: 2xBS b 1962 xWW after 2 decades, xWGF after almost 1.
Amelia Pond: Who are you?
The Doctor: I don't know yet. I'm still cooking.
ENFP-A. Huh.

posts: 5155   ·   registered: Oct. 30th, 2014   ·   location: Central USA
id 7542998
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Skan ( member #35812) posted at 8:05 PM on Saturday, April 30th, 2016

I'm glad that you're able to get this out into the light. To get some justice for your dad.

edited for a oopsie.

[This message edited by Skan at 2:06 PM, April 30th, 2016 (Saturday)]

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012


posts: 11513   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2012   ·   location: So California
id 7543726
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SorrowfulSoul ( member #42817) posted at 1:54 AM on Friday, May 13th, 2016

Any news?

It is not that something different is seen, but that one sees differently. Carl Jung

posts: 160   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2014   ·   location: North of the 49th Parallel
id 7555108
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 yearsofpain25 (original poster member #42012) posted at 4:31 PM on Friday, May 13th, 2016

Any news?

Still in a holding pattern for a bit Sorrowful. Thanks for asking. Haven't heard anything from my attorney in two weeks but that's to be expected as she told me that it would be long and drawn out.

However, my attorney also noted that right before the last court appearance she did receive a message from step momster's lawyer that they may be interested in settling. I told her I would listen to what they have to say but told her since this wasn't about the money I wasn't too interested in settling...but I'm not stupid enough to rule anything out. It's a risk for my lawyer too as the judge could just give everything to step momster anyway.

Until I hear something concrete nothing new to report. But every day that goes by is a day of victory since step momster can't touch the money.

On a different note but still sticking with the infidelity issues, my IC wants to start to explore my feelings on my father, his CoD/KISA complex, the effects that it had on us as a family, and the role it played in him becoming an MH...which is how I ended up in this mess to begin with. Don't forget that step momster is OW in the destruction of my FOO.

BEEP BEEP step momster/OW.

yop

"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

posts: 4519   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Northeast US
id 7555550
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Furious1 ( member #42970) posted at 4:51 PM on Friday, May 13th, 2016

I hope things go well in IC for you on that. Now that the crisis of my own marital issues have settled down, my IC also wants to start addressing my FOO issues. I kind of dread it, but I know it's time to start working on that part. Best of luck to you on that.

BW (me): 46
2 adult kids
D-day: 10/4/13.
Divorced

posts: 7036   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: United States
id 7555574
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MissesJai ( member #24849) posted at 4:55 PM on Friday, May 13th, 2016

Hot diggity damn - you ROCK yop!!!!

44
Happily divorcing..
My Life is Mine!!!!
#BlackLivesMatter
Don't settle for no fuck shit....

posts: 7497   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2009   ·   location: So Cal.....
id 7555584
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ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 6:09 PM on Friday, May 13th, 2016

BEEP BEEP!!!

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 7555656
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