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Try to avoid her and be careful of any charges of parental alienation she may level against you. It's probably going to get worse until she leaves the house. Stay resolute.

I agree this is what she is probably going to try and do

I think it sucks to have to pay for the car,phone,house,utilities, etc so she can sit here and use them. But the end is I sight. I left $400 in the bank as a just in case. Everything else is secured elsewhere.

Hang in there...play the long game...keep your eye on the prize.

FYI - I paid an average of $3500/mo for 18 months, so as not to look bad in the judge's view for "abandoning" the XW and kids. In the end, I paid nothing for XW (bills, back support, alimony, her attorney fees, etc.).

You're doing well. Just keep that VAR's batteries fully charged. You really don't know what they are capable of when reality comes crashing down. (My XW called the police when I was moving my tools/stuff out - said I was stealing from her. )

The others are right. She is just trying to make herself feel better. As far as what talks you have with the kids I would just tell her your not like her. Your not going to lie to your children. I wouldn't really entertain much more of that from her.

My xW is still lieing to my daughter. She says I am just punishing her for our marriage. Its been ten years. You think she would have gotten over herself by now but I guess not. Some women just like to play the victim card 24/7. My kids counceler has done a great job explaining to my kids why they should not be around her now. All you can do is work hard and continue to do the right thing. At some point in time you just go numb to anything your stbxW says and your life will be moving on without her in it.

C

Mblink you are doing great.

I would check with your lawyer about the cornering you thing as it is considered DV. See what they say. Also telling your children the age appropriate truth is the right thing to do. Don't stop being the parent they can count on.

I think it's important to pay close attention to her mental well being. If she's having manic episodes, you don't want to leave the children in her care and you need to document her behavior for future custody issues that may arise.

Once the kids are isolated with her and see how chaotic and unpredictable she is, they may be more vocal about wanting the stability you offer. Right now you are a buffer, but that will change 8/1 and WS will be on her own.

As a divorce attorney...please, please document your day to day life with her! Parental alienation claims are a minefield and she is setting it up. Write down what the kids tell you she has said, the dates/times/etc.

Also, I would be wary of the all-night roaming the house. This woman is not stable and I would not put it past her to try and plant "evidence" to screw you out of something/get you in legal trouble/make herself look better to the children/etc. Also ensure things that are private or valuable to you are secure and don't start disappearing as move out approaches. It may be wise to voice your concerns regarding her mental health to your attorney, as once she is out the solo custody time could become dangerous (or at least emotionally damaging) to your children.

I doubt she has some super secret legal argument that will change the financial equation - at this point I think she is just trying to rattle you a bit.

I really am worried about the roaming the house behavior - that is not the sign of a stable person. She really needs help.

As always, document and then document some more.

I don't recall Mblink recently citing her roaming around the house. Not sure where you guys are getting that

Sybo, refer back to mblink June 7th post. This is something to be concerned about.

got it...my bad.

How are you, Blink?

i agree with Redsox. Something doesn't seem right with her. She can't change the law. She's already admitted to adultery in a proceeding with witnesses.

She doesn't even seem to be concerned with her AP now. It's all about winning. It's all about beating *you*. Her comment about "oh, there is so much more my dear." Or the comment now about how you're going to "pay." This despite the fact that the hearing went very poorly for her. I'd be concerned about her. For example, and not to get you too worried, but what if she tried to kill you, so she could *win*? Is that possible? I hope not. But this wouldn't be the first time something like that has happened.

Be careful friend. The sooner she's out of the house the better.

I don't want to be alarmist, but what if the "you will pay" threat is not about money - what if it is a threat of violence?

Shouldn't OP's attorney be notified and possibly the police?

As we know, monetary payments are all but settled - so this is another type of 'payment' that she will 'collect'?

Very troublesome!

Regardless, Kudos to Mblink for not hesitating on the D while really being an amazing father to his children and a role model to all of us Betrayed folk!

Well Done Sir!!

Not so sure I'm concerned with her escalating to violence. She is very immature and childish. However, I would pay close attention to her mental well being. She's definitely erratic. You've done a great job steadily moving forward. Hang in there.

5 days since we've heard from you, Blink! You alive?

Yeah, Blink? How you doing? You OK?

Sorry for the long absence. I've been trying to stay busy and planning the next step.

So far since the meeting on the 6th

She has been leaving most every day when I get home. Rbis may be for 4 to 5 hours or all night. If she doesn't leave, I find something to do so I'm not around her. My daughter started basketball summer practice so we have hit the gym a couple of nights. Keeps everyone out of the jouse.

I noticed she moved some clothes out of the house yesterday.

I did pick up the burner phone the other day and tried a couple numbers, no luck.

When she does leave, I have not looked at the onstar gps to see where she has went. It's been tough but I have resisted.

Other than that update, the kids and I are planning another state trip this weekend.

Oh, I almost forgot I have reached out to family and a couple of long lost frinds that were removed from my life while I was in the marriage. It's been weird but some people are always there and it feels like we just spoke last week not 16 years agao

Thanks for the update. I'm glad things are going well for you and the kids at the house. Keep doing what your doing...but be prepared for crazy.

Just a month and two weeks left...Have you heard anything about where she will move? If she is living off her own savings and not working will she even have a down payment? When/what is your next court date? What if she doesn't move out on Aug. 1st?

Thanks for the update! That's great to hear about the friends. I've found the same thing, especially with male friends. You can go for over a decade without speaking and pick right back up and not skip a beat.

Ok so much for a great week. Just blew up. Stbxw and MIL came in as soon as the kids and I returned home frOM a two day road trip. DD has a sports camp tomorrow. Stbxw never followed up, so I found the contact, made arrangementsome for email and text updates, bottom line DD and I are prepared for tomorrow. This apparently pissed the stbxw off. So she brought MIL for backup. They jumped on me about knowing what was going on.

I was just going to leave, but they had my truck blocked in the driveway. I moved the stbxws car and was leaving. I heard yelling inside and came back in. The two of them were on my daughter's case. So I stayed. Took her out of the situation and they starting berating me. Eventually they both left. My DD doesn't want to be around the two of them. She has asked to live with me, I am hesitant to have her make such a decision.....

But today may change that. My DD did not breakdown but she was upset. We went to pick up a couple of additional things she needed, while out we spoke. This is the first time I heard them or saw the actions. I'm a bit worried to leave them alone with stbxw next weekend.

Fyi..... we don't have a formal agreement but at her suggestion I took this weekend and she was taking next weekend. I don't know what to do now.

Suggestions???