SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

It can't be good news when your doctor wants to schedule a follow-up appointment.

((((TOC))))

Hang in there. Keep taking it one step at a time. The news will be whatever it is. Your doctor is going to take good care of you.

And we're all standing right behind you.

Sending positive, healing thoughts your way.

((((TOC))))

Sending positive thoughts your way!!!

You will get through this too!!!

It can't be good news when your doctor wants to schedule a follow-up appointment.

That isn't true, TOC. It might not be good news. But it might also be very good news. My doctor schedules follow ups and won't tell me anything over the phone. They don't get to bill if they call me with results so I get it.

I found out I had high risk HPV about 14 years ago. I had a colposcopy first with biopsies. It was good news. No cancer. But I still had to have a follow up appointment to discuss a course of action. It's very easy to hear "no cancer" and think you are done. Doctors want to talk face to face to make sure you know that you still have to follow up with paps once you've had an abnormal one. Sometimes the course isn't standard. In my case, my doctor wanted to follow up with two more paps at 6 month intervals followed by yearly exams if those 6 month paps were clear. No doubt, he wanted to have the conversation face-to-face just to be sure I hadn't heard "no cancer" and began rejoicing in my head to the exclusion of all other advice.

I've now had a second colposcopy because of a pap with abnormal cells and get my results tomorrow. My doctor scheduled a follow up appointment immediately after he finished the colposcopy without even knowing what the results would be. Whether it's good news or bad, the course of action for someone with high risk HPV is different than standard so a follow up is required. I'm not about to assume I have cancer just because he's following up with a face-to-face visit and you shouldn't either. Plus, I think sometimes doctors must just want to see the happy face of someone they give good news to for a change. I would think it would be very stressful to only have follow ups for bad news all the time.

I have a saying "Don't worry until you have a reason to worry." Me worrying about my results won't change my results. All it will do is stress me out. If I find out tomorrow that I have cancer, then I will know I have a reason to worry. But until that appointment, I don't know one way or the other. I could very easily come out of there tomorrow with good news and a plan to keep it that way. And that plan might be the very reason my doctor wanted a face-to-face instead of just a phone call.

(((TOC)))

You can over come anything.

Just take it one step at a time.

We are all here with you and it is going to be ok.

To follow up: It actually CAN be good news.

Although I could have saved a trip if he would have told me over the phone, I found out this afternoon that there was no sign of cancer. He said the tests showed there was no displasia, no abnormal cells, nothing. "See ya in a year" he happily announced.

So, yes, you can have a follow up with good news, TOC. Hang in there.

Don't borrow trouble that might not be yours. Take it a day at a time and try, hard as it is, to not worry. (((hugs)))

It is not always bad news. As a nurse, we are not allowed to give results over the phone. A lot of doctors will also no longer give results over the phone due to the HIPPA laws. Just because someone says they are so and so, that doesn't always mean they are who the doctor thinks they are talking to on the phone.

Try not to worry until you talk to him face to face. Either way, it will be OK. (((HUGS)))

Just checking in on you TOC. Hope everything is ok.

I'm thinking about you too TOC.

I know that this is an anxious time.

Sending you hugs and strength,

MOB xxx

I hope everything goes ok. You're unfortunately in good company, it seems. It feels so extremely violating - almost like their whore slept with you themselves.

Receiving the gift of HPV for my 50th birthday was how I found out my WH was cheating. I'd felt depressed following my 50th birthday, when he hadn't done a thing for it, not even a small gift. So I went to the doctors for a checkup. Turns out he had indeed given me a gift, it just involved a scavenger hunt first (thanks, honey!).

Well, unfortunately my abnormal Pap smear came back positive for high-risk HPV, and I was CIN1. I had a colposcopy and a couple follow up paps on a more frequent basis (every 6 months). In my case, my immune system was run down because I was also simultaneously diagnosed with hypothyroidism. Once I had that treated, my immune system booted out the HPV. Four years later, I'm still clear.

Chin up, my dear. We're here for you, and hopefully this too shall pass.

How are you TOC?

Added on May 1: I'm more than a little concerned. Hoping for the best.

[This message edited by JanetS at 9:52 AM, May 1st (Monday)]

Still no word TOC! I'm hoping you just got very worried.

But I'm imagining you contracted an STD.

I've read about this, and from what I see HPV is something a large percentage of the population gets at one point in their life, some without even knowing it.

Assuming I am correct, and you have HPV I imagine your anger and fear are through the roof. I'm so sorry about this.

This brings to mind that somehow it seems proper to get the message to OW that she has hpv and needs to ensure she doesn't continue to pass it along (so some other innocent BW ends up with it). Maybe email her Mother...that'll get her embarrassed and informed in one go....a twofer.

I imagine you're not back to the board as you are going through a lot. Just know that there are people here thinking of you. You've been wonderful in helping others, so if you need to lean in again, feel free. But if you need your privacy, understood.

I don't think TOC is with us anymore .

Hope you're still reading TOC and know that we're all hoping for the best for you.

[This message edited by nme1 at 8:02 AM, May 4th (Thursday)]

God, I hate and despise cheaters. Am sick of them breaking up their families without regard for the spouse who stood with them through thick and thin and for putting their own children on the back border so they can get their jollies wherever and whenever. Sickening. Disgusting.

TOC, I can't imagine what you're dealing with right now. No words, just sending big hugs and strength. (((( ))))