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Newest Member: BabaA

Just Found Out :
Hindsight

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Shockedmom ( member #44708) posted at 6:20 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2019

It is a shame your daughter had to witness this attempt to manipulate both of you for monetary gain. Please have her see a therapist as she must have trust issues after this latest ploy.

I do commend you for allowing her back into your life for your daughters sake. Hoping that the legal system works in your favor.

posts: 1094   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2014   ·   location: Hawaii
id 8437070
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Buster123 ( member #65551) posted at 10:03 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2019

I remember your story very well and it as a breath of fresh air by the way you handled your awful situation at the time, your EXWW is crazy, she seems not to accept she ruined her life, so now after her plan A failed (getting you back), her plan B is a frivolous lawsuit (it looks like someone's still coaching her but doesn't matter), I hope you still have all your evidence, don't settle and in turn counter sue her. Time to go NC FOREVER, don't allow her in your home ever again, don't even talk to her and ghost her, btw have you started dating again ? Keep us posted, it would be interesting to see what the heck she tries next, sorry for your daughter, as sad as it sounds, in this case it would be a good idea to limit her contact with her toxic mom.

posts: 2738   ·   registered: Jul. 22nd, 2018
id 8437207
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Marz ( member #60895) posted at 10:32 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2019

She changed like a chameleon. It was only temporary to suit her purpose.

Everytime I hear "they've changed" I cringe.

If you want a fairy tale buy a book or rent a movie.

Nice lesson here though.

posts: 6791   ·   registered: Oct. 3rd, 2017
id 8437216
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Marz ( member #60895) posted at 11:50 PM on Friday, September 13th, 2019

She stopped coming around for about a week, the next time she showed up some guy showed up just after her and asked me if my name was YHGTBKM? It turns out I have been served. She is suing me for mental cruelty, and a few other things pertaining to the way I “tossed her out without giving her what she was due”

She is hoping you'll just settle and pay her off. Get the best attorney you can find. It would be worth the expense to see she doesn't get a dime so you don't have to do this again.

You should sit your daughter down and explain what's been going on so she knows why the X showed back up.

posts: 6791   ·   registered: Oct. 3rd, 2017
id 8437246
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Newlifeisgreat ( member #71308) posted at 1:47 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

Just had a thought, what is the statute of limitations on the supposed mental cruelty she claims from you throwing her out? Or is she claiming it was more recent?

Betrayed Spouse. She cheated and I filed immediately upon discovering. She never even suspected that I knew until the moment she was served with reason being Adultery. Divorced: Sept, 2018. VERY happy with new life, 0 regrets

posts: 696   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2019
id 8437293
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Ponus18 ( member #57090) posted at 1:58 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

I’m a lawyer and I have to say I’ve never heard of a naked claim of “mental cruelty.” But I’m no expert so maybe I’m wrong. But it sounds like something she found in a crackerjack box.

Married a serial cheater.
Found out 18 years in.
Happily remarried.

posts: 481   ·   registered: Jan. 25th, 2017
id 8437296
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 YHGTBKM (original poster member #58437) posted at 5:42 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

@ponus18. I literally laughed out loud and told her that 1. We are already divorced and 2. Mental cruelty is what she did to me.

Anyway I spoke to my lawyer and all he could say is "what is she up to?" He told me there was no merit to the mental cruelty claim but depending on the judge and how good of a lawyer she has, the fact that I changed the locks and barred her from the house maybe an issue. He suspects she wants to settle for a sum.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2017
id 8437376
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 YHGTBKM (original poster member #58437) posted at 5:47 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

@shockedmom, that is truly the most aggravating part. I had witnessed her mother act like she was caring and interested and now I find out it was a ruse.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2017
id 8437379
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Carissima ( member #66330) posted at 6:09 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

You're divorced, why does this woman seem to have unlimited access to your home? I know you thought she wanted to reconnect with your daughter but unless your daughter is housebound there is zero need for her to be there!

posts: 963   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2018
id 8437386
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 YHGTBKM (original poster member #58437) posted at 6:58 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

@Carissima, I let boundaries lapse. I was truly happy for my daughter and forgot about her manipulative behavior.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2017
id 8437394
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Odonna ( member #38401) posted at 8:59 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

Again, you are a loving and excellent father. The disappearing act followed by attentive devotion would have snookered me too. It was when she pressured you for sex that her real agenda showed. You were quite a gentleman describing that scene of her failed seduction of you, but I bet it was a doozy!

posts: 978   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2013   ·   location: Northern Virginia
id 8437411
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 YHGTBKM (original poster member #58437) posted at 10:36 AM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

I couldn't resist the opportunity to twist the knife, so I sent her a message saying that I am glad she showed me her true agenda early because I was starting to fall hard for her again.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2017
id 8437418
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Bourbonhelps ( new member #71275) posted at 12:37 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

I love your email.

Now she is backpedaling, way to keep her on the ropes.

I hope your daughter weathers this new act by her mother well.

posts: 25   ·   registered: Aug. 14th, 2019   ·   location: Kentucky
id 8437430
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nekonamida ( member #42956) posted at 5:17 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

What a psycho! She will never give it up, will she?

Have you considered getting your DD into therapy? It's got to be hard on her having her crazy mom in and out of her life and roping her into her drama and manipulations.

posts: 5232   ·   registered: Mar. 31st, 2014   ·   location: United States
id 8437517
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Tseratievig ( member #53253) posted at 5:49 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

I couldn't resist the opportunity to twist the knife, so I sent her a message saying that I am glad she showed me her true agenda early because I was starting to fall hard for her again.

OMG, that's too funny.

"If you can meet with triumph and disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same."

posts: 114   ·   registered: May. 17th, 2016   ·   location: Chicago Suburbs
id 8437529
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TimSC ( member #58844) posted at 6:03 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

Does your daughter understand that both of you were being manipulated by your XW?

That has to be a hard blow for a child.

posts: 396   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2017   ·   location: SE USA
id 8437534
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JS84 ( member #48148) posted at 9:36 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

Man your ex is a devious hot mess. Glad you're out, even if not completely.

posts: 443   ·   registered: Jun. 6th, 2015
id 8437626
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Bladerunner2054 ( member #69235) posted at 9:43 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2019

Just read the entire thread. It is epic!

Man, you did everything right. Congratulations, and heave a big sigh of relief that hopefully you're in the closing stretch.

BH 64
WW 62
DD 8/80
Total denial still
I have proof

posts: 112   ·   registered: Dec. 26th, 2018   ·   location: FL
id 8437627
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The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 1:18 AM on Sunday, September 15th, 2019

I guess the XW ain’t all that!!!!

She just thinks she can snap her fingers and presto! You will magically want to take her back. How delusional. And to drag her daughter into this is just despicable.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.

posts: 14748   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8437708
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WTFOVER ( member #61195) posted at 2:01 AM on Sunday, September 15th, 2019

You have handled yourself and this situation remarkably well and are an inspiration to many here. Your daughter is fortunate to have a father like you. Keep us posted.

posts: 54   ·   registered: Oct. 26th, 2017   ·   location: Texas
id 8437720
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