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zebra25 (original poster member #29431) posted at 11:20 PM on Monday, November 23rd, 2020
Ugh. OW sighting. 
DD was showing me something on Facebook and apparently she is friends with OW's niece. 
As I was scrolling I saw a picture of OW. DD knows nothing about the affair.
It's been a long time and I don't think about her much anymore. Seeing her picture did give me a sick, gut punched feeling.
She is a smug, unapologetic lying piece of crap.
I'm a little disappointed that this is bothering me but it is.
"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."
D-day April 2010
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:30 PM on Monday, November 23rd, 2020
Of course it will bother you. That’s to be expected.
But hopefully you moved on quickly.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
BentandBroken ( member #72519) posted at 1:13 AM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
Don't beat up on yourself. Of course it's hurtful! I have had the good fortune to NOT know what my xWH's current AP looks like. At some point I'm sure I will come across a picture or, heaven please help me, run into them in person. I pray for strength if/when that happens.
Very sorry you had to see that. And I completely understand the gut punch. You are forever better. Integrity is irredeemable for the cheater and the worthless AP. Yet it's priceless and you still have it!
Hard as it is, maybe try to focus on that. (((big hug)))
20+ year relationship; Never officially married
Dday November 2019
4 wonderful grown children
WH multiple APs, currently involved with married COW
Kicked him out on Dday and that was that
zebra25 (original poster member #29431) posted at 4:58 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
Thank you for your kind words.
I thought by now my reaction would have been more indifference and less visceral.
I guess I'm human. I still think she is a gross, immoral, lying, selfish piece of cheating poo. 
Thanks again for the support. This isn't something to share over zoom with friends and family. 
"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."
D-day April 2010
JulyDD ( member #75053) posted at 5:32 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
I am also totally understanding of why you felt the way you did. Good grief, it's hard! I have only seen FB pics of my H's AP but she also looks smug, arrogant and like a total B. Not to mention a mean girl.
I'm sorry you saw that but know that many of us hear understand that gut punch feeling. Mine is there in spades. I am hopeful for the day I don't feel that way.
Hugs!
IronStitches ( new member #49315) posted at 5:35 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
Zebra,
Here's a suggestion - this is so childish but it's stupidly fun.
Take a picture of the picture of the OW and then do terrible things to the photo on your phone. You might actually get some laughs out of it. You get to be immature and get some of those feelings out - no one gets hurt. It's a sort of release.
"Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you." - Unknown
zebra25 (original poster member #29431) posted at 10:44 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020
Thank you for understanding.
I'm not above harmless childish acts. Whatever helps!!
Shortly after dday I copied ow's picture and taped it over my head on one of our wedding portraits and placed it on my husband's pillow.
"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."
D-day April 2010
Inshreds ( member #58075) posted at 8:24 PM on Wednesday, November 25th, 2020
I see the OW and former BFF around town also. Small town so..... It is so hard! Still. She feels no remorse, nothing. Acts normal, smiles and laughs. I want to either throw up or punch her. ugh
Me: BS Him: WS mid 50's Married 30+ years serial cheater
gmc94 ( member #62810) posted at 8:26 PM on Wednesday, November 25th, 2020
Shortly after dday I copied ow's picture and taped it over my head on one of our wedding portraits and placed it on my husband's pillow.
I dunno, but a big part of me wants to file this away as "what to do when you want to punch your WS but know it's wrong"
Thanks for the chuckle.
M >25yrs/grown kids
DD1 1994 ONS prostitute
DD2 2018 exGF1 10+yrEA & 10yrPA... + exGF2 EA forever & "made out" 2017
9/18 WH hung himself- died but revived
It's rude to say "I love you" with a mouthful of lies
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