we are 1 year into whatever crisis my WS was in, and i have been encouraged to forgive & forget, manipulated, gaslit, the death of his mother is constantly to blame, for whatever he got up to, and i don't truly know the half of it. i assume, that if you're going to lie that much, and sneak around with a girl 40yrs your jr. there's a reason you don't want your partner of 22yrs to know about it. but now what? i have no closure, i've swept so much lies, betrayal, disrespect, destroyed self esteem, and loss under the rug, i'm starting to trip over it. he says a lot, but i don't know what i trust or believe anymore. he's starting to behave like a real man again, but i have such doubts, and no help to getting him back. he says he wouldn't still be here, if he didn't want to be, but even that's not true, we can't move, the place we own together won't sell yet, and my FIL needs the stability of living in one place. (with us)
yes he went through another life crisis, trauma, and yes, his brain deals with things differently than most, he was lost, and he lashed out at the one person, he knew would forgive him, and help him pick up the pieces. i love him dearly, and can't see life without him, we have no children, and i have no other family (or friends) to turn to, hence the reason i went back! oh, and i realize i'm the reason his cousins won't come & visit with us, because i messaged them the night i left, i wanted someone to hate him that night as much as i did, but he doesn't know they know, oops! where do i go from here?
[This message edited by redloui at 6:43 PM, Thursday, July 30th]
