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Married, 3 children, wife had EA (?). Need advice.

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Thumos posted 12/17/2019 16:45 PM

BSPheonix, how are you?

I'm going through my very own showdown with my WW over a poly scheduled for Monday the 23rd.

Hang in there.

steadychevy posted 12/17/2019 18:00 PM

My best wishes to you as you proceed, Thumos. Clarity of thought and strength of mind to you.

BSPheonix, you haven't posted for a week. Hope that's a good sign but thinking it's not.

Thumos posted 1/6/2020 12:17 PM

BSPheonix, any news now that the holidays are over?

Unsure2019 posted 1/6/2020 21:46 PM


[This message edited by Unsure2019 at 9:54 PM, January 6th (Monday)]

BSPheonix posted 1/8/2020 07:12 AM

Hi All,

Thank you for the support. I hope you all had a good break over the holiday period and wish you the best for 2020.

Life was exceptionally busy, hence the absence. My VARs haven't revealed anything further of note. My WW has completed the timeline I asked for in as much detail as possible and, has answered any other questions I had based on that. I'm reluctant to poly for a number of reasons (one being the seeming lack of reliable suppliers in the UK and, another being that I think I've resigned myself to focus on healing and, to be honest, roll the dice). At this point, even if a poly was performed and, the results were incriminating, I'd still stay for the sake of the children. I refuse to let the actions of others damage my children if I can take steps to mitigate this.

fareast posted 1/8/2020 07:39 AM

Totally your call on the poly. You can always change your mind in the future if you feel the need. The other things on your list of demands have been completed, STD test, timeline, post nup. Your WW is still No Contact. You did well by taking control. Be vigilant. But by all means concentrate on your healing. Take care of you. Good luck.

[This message edited by fareast at 11:11 AM, January 8th (Wednesday)]

Thumos posted 1/8/2020 10:55 AM

BS, I'm getting ready to move forward with a post nup from my wife, since she's offered. I wondered if you had any good examples to draw from or did an attorney do it for you? Send me a PM with any information if you're comfortable - thanks in advance.

BSPheonix posted 2/6/2020 09:37 AM

Hey @Thumos, apologies for the delay in responding. I don't seem able to PM you. Perhaps I need to reach a certain number of posts before that functionality is available? Anyway, I had a solicitor friend go over things with me and, most of it revolves around the law specific to the country I'm in (where post-nups tend to be upheld).

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