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Chrysalis123 posted 12/14/2019 18:26 PM

My youngest daughter graduated from college yesterday. I am so proud of her.

She attends college 2000 miles away from me, but only 6 hours from her father. She and I discussed the situation and the reality that she would have very little time with me due to the fact that I work and would have to fly out and fly right back, while she was sharing her time with her father and his wife.

I told her I'd be happy to come or we could go on a week long cruise...her choice. She chose the cruise.

Yesterday she posted a family picture. I had not seen the wasband in about 5 years and I don't give him eye contact so I have not had a good look at him in a long time.

He looked unrecognizable to me. Literally, if I walked by him I would not know him. And he looked very, very sad. The kind of sad picture one would expect at a funeral or mug shot.

I guess all his horrible choices caught up with him. I, on the other hand, look great. Cutting that psychological vampire out of my life did wonders for me and my well being.

[This message edited by Chrysalis123 at 6:28 PM, December 14th (Saturday)]

Chili posted 12/14/2019 18:39 PM

I, on the other hand, look great.

But of course you do. Because you're living right from the inside out!

He looked unrecognizable to me.

Isn't that a trip? The last picture I saw of assclown looked like a totally different person. Sad and worn out and tore up.

Maybe there is something to that vampire thing after all.

LOVE the cruise idea by the way - serious fun (and warmth I hope) + you get to spend some real time with her one-on-one. Congrats to the proud Mom as well!

WhoTheBleep posted 12/14/2019 19:57 PM

Congrats to your daughter!!

And yup, on EX looking awful. Those poor choices really do catch up with you...too bad so sad...

Stbx looks awful. Worse every time I see him. I don't see how his body can keep supporting him.

A close friend of mine saw SO and I out on a date a few months ago. It was our 3rd date. She told me the next day, that we looked like a couple of movie stars sitting there...

Granted she is a close friend, but still... I thought we looked pretty damn good, too.

[This message edited by WhoTheBleep at 7:58 PM, December 14th (Saturday)]

Bleu posted 12/14/2019 20:29 PM

Chrysalis123,

Congratulations on the graduation, cruise and living well!!

WhoTheBleep,

Way to go!

Chrysalis123 posted 12/14/2019 20:39 PM

Isn't that a trip? The last picture I saw of assclown looked like a totally different person. Sad and worn out and tore up.

Maybe there is something to that vampire thing after all.

I know, right? It's blowing my mind how unrecognizable he is. And that this transformation into a sad, worn out and torn up body is not an unusual occurrence after truly extended fucked up behavior.

In my head I knew this. Like for meth and heroin addicts.... But that knowledge did not transfer to the wasband and his willful destruction of our family and his attempt at annihilating me.

It's very odd how similar in presentation these personality disordered people are.

Chili posted 12/14/2019 20:48 PM

we looked like a couple of movie stars sitting there...

Can I get your autograph?

But you know, your SI handle is really sucky to be all famous Hollywood and everything. Doesn't exactly have that pizazz screen name flow to it. "Oh look! It's WhoTheBleep...wait isn't that What'sHerWhoThe?..."

Sure you can fix it up before you get those head shots taken though.

k8la posted 12/14/2019 20:50 PM

Reminds me of a 1945 movie I once saw on that old movie tv channel called "The Picture of Dorian Gray".

But in real life there is no magic portrait that can conceal the true character of people who go about deliberately and selfishly wounding people to the core.

skeetermooch posted 12/14/2019 20:59 PM

I guess all his horrible choices caught up with him. I, on the other hand, look great. Cutting that psychological vampire out of my life did wonders for me and my well being.

This is my kind of karma. I love this story!

I thought I looked great when I met my STBX - youthful, strong, happy, confidant and in just two short years I looked like I was so much older, weary, depressed, I didn't stand as tall, I put on a little weight. I felt frumpy and unattractive. My confidence was shot. I went from wearing beautiful clothes to mostly sweats.

With him out of the house less than 2 months and as sad as this has been I've already been told I'm glowing and I feel definitely feel more confidant.

I guess evil really does eat them from the inside out.

He was an adonis when we married. He's fifty pounds heavier and counting. He looks bloated and unhealthy and a lot older.

[This message edited by skeetermooch at 9:01 PM, December 14th (Saturday)]

homewrecked2011 posted 12/14/2019 23:01 PM

I also saw a photo posted of xh at Sons grad. He is 51 and looks like a very old, out of shape man. and his soul is as disgusting.

We are truly better now, bc they are gone from our day to day
Life.

Newbeginnings24 posted 12/15/2019 02:01 AM

That is great karma for those who see their ex WH’s as worn out individuals. Goes to show what pain they inflict on others comes to bite them back on the arse.

I however see this and hear this from mutual friends but it hasn’t been long enough for me to appreciate this as karma, I don’t think.

I just end up wondering WTH has he done and why is he ignoring his mental health and personal care if he has made the right choice and is the master of his convictions.

He has split from the OW 3 times in 5 months and i wonder if this is causing him his troubles. She sounds like a psycho but he blames our situation.

I am getting stronger each day and feel and look great also. I think not being entangled in someone else helps a lot. You are free and your mind and heart are healthy for those who matter.

NB x

Newbeginnings24 posted 12/15/2019 02:02 AM

That is great karma for those who see their ex WH’s as worn out individuals. Goes to show what pain they inflict on others comes to bite them back on the arse.

I however see this and hear this from mutual friends but it hasn’t been long enough for me to appreciate this as karma, I don’t think.

I just end up wondering WTH has he done and why is he ignoring his mental health and personal care if he has made the right choice and is the master of his convictions.

He has split from the OW 3 times in 5 months and i wonder if this is causing him his troubles. She sounds like a psycho but he blames our situation.

I am getting stronger each day and feel and look great also. I think not being entangled in someone else helps a lot. You are free and your mind and heart are healthy for those who matter.

NB x

Phoenix1 posted 12/15/2019 10:20 AM

Good one, Chrys!

The1stWife posted 12/15/2019 10:47 AM

I also think that being able to take a step back and seeing the X from a reality perspective opens your eyes too.

You see them for what they really are sometimes.

squid posted 12/16/2019 10:13 AM

I saw my XWW this weekend too. Maybe the second time I've seen her in a year. She was dropping off DS as I was leaving the house. She's always been thin. But she seemed even thinner now. And had a sadness in her eyes. I found myself feeling sorry for her. What's that about?

Congrats on your daughter's success!

ZenMumWalking posted 12/16/2019 10:58 AM

Woot Wooooooottttttt!!!! WTG Chrys, not so much wasband.

barcher144 posted 12/16/2019 12:24 PM

Congratulations on the graduation and from escaping.

It's amazing how healthy it can be to get out of a bad relationship!