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If you haven't seen the movie as a Wayward or BS, I highly recommend it. It moves me like few movies ever had, especially since D-Day. For those who haven't seen it, George Clooney plays a man whose wife is in a coma following an accident. During this, he finds out she had an affair and was planning to leave him.

This movie has been out for several years and when I first saw it, I was still in the fog and watched it with a sort of detached indifference. It moved me and I thought it was beautiful, but I didn't identify at the time with the pain Clooney's character was going through after his own D-Day. This weekend was the first time I'd watched it since D-Day, and I bawled through the whole damned thing. It gave me some new insight in to the train wreck and ruin that waywards leave behind.

Anyway, if you've seen it either as a BS or WS, I'd be interested to hear your thoughts.

I've never heard of it. Would it be triggering to watch with my BH?

I've seen it. I was interested in it to see how they played the infidelity angle, and also for the scenes of Hawaii (my sister lives there)...I thought it was a good film, the shock when he learned of the betrayal was very well portrayed. I wasn't sure some of the other scenes were true to life though - of course it's difficult to know what you would do in that situation but I don't think I would have 'forgiven' quite so easily. Especially being able to talk to the other adultery conspirators. Who knows though?

I am glad I wasn't TOO close to DDay when I watched it though.

Pink - I'm afraid I can't say whether it would be triggering to watch with your BH. Depends on how far out you are and how easily he triggers. I know that right now there's no way I'd watch it with my BS. Jesus, if me as a Wayward bawls through the entire movie, I can't imagine what it would do to her. I might suggest watching it first by yourself if you have that ability. If after watching it you think BS could get through it, you might offer to watch it with him.

[This message edited by AshamedDad at 11:38 AM, October 29th (Monday)]

Turned it off as soon as that was revealed. Too triggery for both of us. We have not tried to watch it since.

Debra -

Yeah, as I said to Pink, there's no way I'd want to watch this close to D-Day and there's no way I'd watch it with my own BS right now. She wouldn't be able to take it. There are way too many similarities to what we went through.

The music and location is so beautiful too. It really makes the movie. Something about Hawaii (one of my favorite places in the world) that makes it work better than if it took place, in say, New York or something. The constant contrast between the beauty of the surroundings and the pain Clooney is going through. It just leaves me speechless.

A good movie to watch is "The Details" with Tobey Maguire. Ray Liotta is in it and he really gives some written/acted sage advice about "owning it and getting it" to Tobey Maguire/the married cheater when it comes to changing.

Saw it but watched it on my own. I can't really say how WH would react, I suspect he would be uncomfortable.

It was a very good movie however, it was upsetting to me at the same time for the obvious reasons.

Even though I was betrayed by a former partner over forty years ago, I applauded when they pulled the plug. Yes, I guess I am a judgemental bastard. Had the wife lived, she likely would have been divorced, and pining away for an AP that wanted to stay in his marriage.

That sounds like a trigger nightmare. Every time we watch TV, I am constantly paranoid about something like this appearing. I would never put this on knowing the subject matter. It sounds like something the WS should watch alone to feel the devastation that is left behind for the BS to suffer with.

^^same. I was innocently watching 90 Day Fiance the other night and they started talking about a guy that cheated. I swear to God they said the word cheater 50x in a minute. I couldn't grab the remote fast enough!!!

I’m a WS and I found “Take This Waltz” with Michelle Williams and Seth Rogen to be really well made. They weren’t married but were living together and her EA seems really out of the blue. Then after the EA is exposed Sarah Silverman says to her something about “Life has gaps, it just does, you don’t go running around like crazy to try to fill them.” That line spoke to me. Watching their relationship before she strays makes me so sad because it’s so good and then it’s ruined which is what I did to my relationship. Mine might not have been just as good but maybe we were just in one of those gaps. And I ran to fill it way too quickly and easily. Not sure any BSs would appreciate the movie but I did as a WS.

Watched it with WH when it first came out and years before dday... thinking about it now has a whole new meaning, and given WH's suicide, would probably send me into trigger city. Tho I can certainly fantasize about hunting down the AP (albeit not with the kids' help!)