SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Here are a few - I had so many, I actually created a private FB group for my interested friends because I got tired of whinging on my primary FB account - lol

the fork-licker. When our entrees arrived, he licked the salad dressing off of his fork as if it were a lollipop

"separated" men who "...live in half a duplex I own and my wife and kids live in the other half"

divorced men who "still vacation with my ex and my sons" . The sons in question are both over 20...I suggested to him that if his ex was still so great they vacationed together, he should just re-marry her and recoup the tax breaks. Heh.

men who made it clear they wouldn't date plus-sized women, yet had breasts larger than mine.

men who didn't want to date with an eye toward a possible relationship, but who wanted to "hang out". Translation - they wanted to eat my food, drink my wine, sleep with me, and then leave.

men who made fun of me because I use cloth napkins and actual china when I serve meals

the man who gave me the full-court press for 3 months and then just as I was starting to fall, decided to go back to his former girlfriend - with whom he had only broken up with about a week before I met him. Funny how that never came up in conversation.

So, I gave up. I adopted a dog early last year, and I made up my mind that this is how it would be. I would be single and I would have a pretty good job and I would knit and read and cook my way through "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" and I would take day trips and I'd paint and have a life that was about the same (and probably better, actually) than the lives of most 50-something single women. I finally made peace with myself and the fact that I would be single from here on out.

I had a lot on my plate health-wise. I was diagnosed with acute anemia last March. I had hired a personal trainer in August 2015, and when my progress started reversing seriously, she made me promise to see a doctor. Thankfully, I listened and with the help of a series of iron infusions, I was able to recover quickly and get back on track.

Around the time I was in the middle of my iron infusions, I received an email from a man with whom I had briefly exchanged a few messages on an online dating site before I hung it up - lol. He asked if we could meet for dinner. I told him I wasn't really up to meeting anyone because of my health issues, but that we could write and text. We did for a while, and then he asked if he could call me. I thought "what the heck - why not?", so he did. He was very polite and we talked and texted about a lot of things. He was a reader and had a great vocabulary, used proper punctuation (hey - we all have our turn-ons, right? Hah!) and was employed. Divorced for 13 years, he had 3 grown sons - 26, 23 and 18 - whom he had raised on his own. He lived about 80 miles away in NY state (for those of you who have not had the distinct fun of online dating, a distance of 80 miles is practically next door).

After we had been communicating for a while, he asked again if we could meet for dinner. By this time, I felt really good and healthy, so I said yes. I figured it would end the same way as before - dinner, some laughs, and then he'd move on to find someone closer/thinner/younger/whatever.

That was 8 months ago. Every weekend, except this last one when his area had a lot of snow, he has driven 80 miles down to me on Friday afternoons and left Monday mornings. He's the grounds superintendent for a 12-school district and snows screw everything up. The last guy I dated for any length of time only lived 25 miles from me, yet only came to my house about 6 times in the 2 years we dated. It's true what they say - when someone is interested, they'll make sure you know it.

He is planning on moving here this year when his youngest son leaves the nest. Yep - he thinks I'm worth that 160 mile RT every day for the next 10 years (until he retires).

Sometimes, giving up brings good things :)

Hope4

I've had some good ones, no particular order:

The teacher (online education) - she's completely location independent. Athletic. Definitely looking to settle down. Not pushy, just not my type. I'd be friends with her, but she's slightly too far away in terms of geography. She was interested and a little smitten. Financially, she's about where I was after graduating college. She'd be easy to fold into an existing life that's established.

The stylist - cuts hair/owns a salon for a living. Her last relationship was with a woman. She's 4 years older than me, vegetarian, loves kids. Never married. Pretty, sexy, but she's a bit too hippie for me and into the type of recreational activities that hippies are into. She vacuumed my house in her underwear on date 7 or so (epic move). I dated her for months, I think we've found a good friendship place after a very sexual relationship and I trust her completely... Although the transition from more-than-friends to friends can be a little challenging, I think it's working. She's adventurous and barring other stuff going on, I'd have her travel with me. We have good symbiosis - meaning she's really good with things that I'm not and vice versa. She's easy to play "house" with. Because she has had relationships with women, you have to be pretty confident as a man. Sweet, sweet girl...

Divorcee - 8 years younger. Very eager to get out and start dating again and very physically motivated. 2 kids, professional, going to school for her MBA, so she's busy. She's fun, a little crazy when she gets out and has some wine. She doesn't have great boundaries, if she keeps to OLD, she's going to have trouble. She's in great shape and is my physical type.

Model - Actually, she runs an office in health care, but used to model to put her way through college. Woman is absolutely stunning, 1 year older than me, very very affectionate, but outside of seeing her doesn't communicate a whole lot. I actually got a little infatuated with her, which was an interesting feeling and a little scary. She says she's old fashioned and expects to be pursued a bit, which makes me a little uncomfortable after 4 dates - I'm used to it being a little easier... One child, same age as mine. My relationship with her moves pretty slowly. We'll see where this one goes. I'm being very open and honest with her that I'm interested, but she needs to make more time.

FYI - I filter pretty well, always talk to them first before meeting and keep the initial meeting very casual with an escape route (for either of us).

Guys: This sounds easy, it's not. With OLD, and you're not a woman, you'll need to do the approaching and it's much more than saying "hi". Read what she writes and respond to it. It can take weeks / months to get a woman comfortable enough to meet you... Men will date a woman just on appearance, but usually not the other way around (unless you're really good looking). Expect to put some time in if this is how you want to meet new people.

I pay for dates, open doors, and even if the date is going badly, go out of my way to make them feel special...

[This message edited by fargles at 8:24 AM, February 16th (Thursday)]

Posting to revive this thread. Here's what I got in my inbox today.

Holy catfishing Batman! Ladies, if you see anything like this, run, quickly, away...

""Hello!! i must say you have a wonderful profile here & you are actually startling gorgeous and have an amazing smile. I stumbled on your profile and it warmed my heart, the impact has been overwhelming, An interesting profile shouldn't be neglected that's why I am taking the first step I will like to get in touch with you, to share and listen to unspoken needs and also recognizes secret dreams, by understanding the silent things which speaks from one heart to another with the true miracle called true friendship.

I am 57 there was an error on my age, I have one daughter and i am interested in you. What pride is in a man who doesn't appreciate an interesting beautiful queen like you.

Can you give me the honor of getting to know you more better and would love to have an opportunity to communicate with you and get to know you very well and start up conversations with you if you do not mind.I will really appreciate it from my heart if you take time to send a note back to me or drop me your email address so i can write directly. Or better still email at bj*****@*mail.com for continua conversation."

[This message edited by FaithFool at 3:54 AM, June 12th (Monday)]

^^^ Woah.. that was a deep intro.. LOL!!!

Does anybody remember the cheesy nut guy story? That was a classic!

Also the story of a woman on here who texted s guy quite a bit but they could never make plans to meet up. Finally she was going to be in his area and he asked if she could stop by his home (during the day). So she does and finds the reason he could never meet with her was because he was on in-house arrest, complete with electronic monitoring device (ankle bracelet)! So that was a NEXT!

Cheesy Nut Man was Sazzy's classic.

I just saw a doozy on PoF who apparently wants to meet me.

Several pics, including one of him standing in front of a whole pig roasting on a spit, and another one (just to get the point across I guess) of him standing in front of a sign in some foreign country that says "Eat All You Can Healthy Food" with some veggies and.... you guessed it, a whole pig on a spit.

I guess he figured not including a fish pic would make him stand out in the crowd.

The best part is his headline: Can I desccription latter

[This message edited by FaithFool at 6:13 PM, June 16th (Friday)]

OMG, I admire all of you for being so brave! I have never been involved with OLD so I don't have funny stories, so thanks for sharing.

I DID allow myself to be set up for a blind date with one of my friend's uncle. She'd been raving for weeks about how 'perfect we'd be for each other.' He was a nice man. He picked me up at my friend's house and had a beautiful sports car convertible. As I love cars, this was a plus. HOWEVER - he put on a CD of the Kingston Trio and played it so loud, driving down the road and I thought my ear drums would burst. How many times can one hear "Hang down your head Tom Doley" without jumping out of a car and making a run for it?

Well, I can never "OLD" (yes, I had to look it up to find out what it was).

1) I'm married!

2) I'm old and fat and out of shape

3) I don't have the energy or the underwear for it.

HOWEVER.......I have just spent the last hour reading this whole thread, laughed my ass off, and want to invite all of you to my house this weekend.

I have never had so much fun in my whole life!!!!

My very last online date a year ago convinced me to delete all my profiles lol. He was mid thirties, incredibly short, and kept boasting about how he used to bang his daughters 19yr old swim instructor . I had one beer and he had me pay for it, next day told me he'd like to meet again. Um nope no way

My scary one was an evening coffee meet up, within minutes he kept trying to get me to leave w him to walk a nearby park. At night. Kept pushing me to leave, was so creepy and he refused to drop it after I nicely told him I was more comfortable at the Starbucks. He definitely made me feel like I would've ended up in a dumpster had I left with him. Yikes

[This message edited by Jls0320 at 1:10 PM, June 18th (Sunday)]

Jeaniegirl ~ The only song I could've tolerated, even greatly enjoyed, would have been Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love" under the open air circumstances.

For the vocabulary challenged, I use *platonic* a LOT in my profile.

"If I had known you were so pretty, I would have shaved. Not just my face." The first thing my blind date said, after he arrived 10 min too late.

I did online dating before I met my ex husband. This was over 15 years ago.

There was a minister on the dating site and he was pretty attractive and had a nice profile.

We chatted online a few times and he asked me to meet him for a cup of coffee. I met him and after the "pleasantries" he told me I was a "painted lady". I'm actually quite conservative, but I do wear a bit of makeup. I was insulted and was getting ready to leave when he told me that he would like to make me part of his "flock" but that I would need to dress plainly and wear no makeup!

Jerk! He bugged me for a while after that, too. No thank you!

Another one from 15 years ago. He was very nice-looking, well educated and in fact he was one of the top administrators for a school district.

I liked him - at first. We went out a few tunes and his story was that he'd been married and divorced once. One night he told me that he'd lied and he was sorry. There was another wife in there and he'd only been divorced six months and not years as he'd told me.

He then began to elaborate and he told me he'd belted ex wife #1 in the face once (after their divorce) and ex wife #2 got a restraining order on him. This was enough for me and I was done.

A few years later he made front page news. He'd been communicating online with someone who was posing as a young teenage girl, but he'd never met the girl. He was communicating with this person using school district property. He was caught and fired and it made the news. But he was never arrested.

Obviously it wasn't a "real" young teenage girl he was communicating with. My guess is he must have made someone, probably a woman he dated, very angry and she got even with him.

Somer, I am LOL'ing at the 'painted lady' comment.

I didn't last long on OLD. I think a week. That was back in 2015 and I haven't gone near it since.

I pulled the plug on it when, after the usual "getting to know you, whether you do etc" messages the person with whom I had most "clicked" evealed that they had an upcoming DUI which was in fact their third DUI charge, which is a felony. Same person showed up in our office last January for possession of heroin. And prostitution.

All my dates since have been "organic".

My email tells me I have a message from someone on OLD but I haven't logged on to see it yet.

He has a cleverly written jokey profile that reads like a standup comic routine.

As if written by our beloved funnelcakes. Maybe she's hired herself out to do stuff like this?

Only one pic and not really too attractive (just him and a gargoyle, I know, they flock to me...), and the writing is kind of over the top, but clever.

I'm almost skeered to see what Mr. Sarcasm has to say but curiosity will eventually get the better of me.

Opening line: " I could go absolutely bonkers for a girl who talks to mice and knits tiny sweaters for them."

I promise to report back if I decide to open it...

[This message edited by FaithFool at 9:45 PM, July 8th (Saturday)]

Well he sounds reasonably normal, but there was another one from a widower in "Calgary, Ontario" who said he didn't have pets but one of his two pics is one where he's looking like he's about to strangle two Borzois. The other one is of him wearing what looks like a wolf fur coat...

These catfishers are hilarious...

My name is XXXX, i’m new on here, I can't just imagine myself being captivated by just a wink of your picture when i was going through your profile, i must say you are PRETTY.You are beautiful because I looked into your eyes and I saw what was in your heart, because Beauty is not seen through the eyes, but the heart.I would like to meet in you in person so as to know how beautiful you really are true beauty cannot be seen from the outside, it must be found within the soul of your love hope you understand what i mean?i will like us to talk this over getting to know each other who knows if this special moment might turn destiny.......and if we are meant to be even the ASTROLOGY ,nor be it GEOGRAPHY couldn't keep us apart. I would love learn more about you but i am always busy but trust me, I attend to emails, it would be so nice to read from you in my personal email, You can contact me on my own email on <catfisher> at gmail dot com or text my personal # xxx-xxx-xxxx

Looking forward to read from you.

[This message edited by FaithFool at 12:13 PM, July 9th (Sunday)]

One line description from a profile today. Be still my heart... You can't make this shit up.

Im careing smart funny layal sexual and im potty trained

[This message edited by FaithFool at 9:03 PM, July 19th (Wednesday)]

What a relief that he's potty trained!

Wait, is that a requirement nowadays?

[This message edited by devotedman at 9:31 PM, July 19th, 2017 (Wednesday)]