SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

The Whore.

I do not talk to ex but when I talk about her to my friends I call her HooverMatic, she has sucked his brains out.

He usually calls her "it". I usually call her "that person". I don't even like using pronouns such as she or her bc it personifies her too much. We definitely don't use her name and never have. MC did once and it was a bad idea.

He has also called her that f'ing bitch whore who ruined his life and a bony assed runt. Can't say I don't like those names (ha) but they're a little long to use in conversation.

In the beginning, I called her many not so nice thing. Now, I just use her name. Not sure why her name doesn't bug me but it doesn't.

I usually just say "that person" when I'm talking about with my husband. When I write on here, I hate saying OW. She doesn't seem worthy of being called a woman. Even "person" is really stretching it.

We refer to her as "IT", she's not a person to me, not a human being she's an "IT"

Normally I call her by her name. If I am upset, I call her ho-zilla due to her resemblance to a gorilla Most of my friends just say 1-900-hername as she was a phone sex operator

I called her his girlfriend a few times.....WH hated that......they were just close friends don't ya know

Well since my WS won't talk we haven't come across this issue. On DDay, I referred to her as that C.... In Chicago. I spoke her name once when I confronted him with what I knew and I stuck on my tongue and I got nauseas. In my head, she's that f'n C...

After reading these responses though, it does help to hear from everyone. When and if he finally talks, it'll be interesting to see what evolves.

I ALWAYS called her by her name. I firmly believe that it rips away any illusions when you call the OW by name for both you and the WS. I seldom called her anything awful. Calm and cool and direct always upset him more than watching me have a name calling melt down.

I have always refered to him by name or by "him" with emphasis on "him" so that she understands I mean the OM.

Have stayed away from name calling, etc.

My wh HATED when I called her his girlfriend. It is fascinating how many have had that same response. Any ides why?

Why do they hate it? Because every person on the planet knows that married people are not supposed to have girl/boyfriends. And if the WS uses that term, then the WS has to actually acknowledge what a horrific thing they've done. It seems to make them pretty damn uncomfortable, thus the squirming when the word is used.....just my opinion.

(@bikingguy--dude, we aren't in Recon. We're in General. Bad words are acceptable, and almost expected, here!)

[This message edited by gonnabe2016 at 10:41 AM, March 4th (Monday)]

I have loads of names that I use to refer to OW. They are as follows:- Your Whore, Your Mistress, Your Girlfriend, hog nose, pug face, the michelin man, the stay puff marshmallow man (ow is very fat and masculine looking), miss piggy gone wrong (miss piggy was WH's favourite muppet, I spoilt that for him), toadface, the "udder" woman, banana boobs (based on something WH said about her boobs) and last but not least.. loose and well used *word that has been banned on SI* ...ugh writing this out has now made me feel ill...why am I considering R again????

"whore" or "your girlfriend"/"your little girlfriend". He refers to her as "that dirty bitch" Funny how she was once his goddess and the love of his life but now she's just a dirty bitch.

I have always used her name. I think to shy away from it comes from a place of fear and I wouldn't be able to heal if I gave her that power.

The rat bastard...( we both refer to him that way)

In my case the MOM has the same first name as me (yeah, another BetrayedDaddio, small world) so in writing I usually put SFDB (short fat douche bag) or in conversation, which isn't often I just say "The Douche".......

BD-thats one of my nicknames (douchebag). I also like any number of words followed or preceeded by the word "shit" such as dip, dumb, and -for-brains. His real name is John, which is interesting in that I have to live hearing the name a lot as one of my best friends and at least 5 acquantances are all named John. If only his name was something less common--why coulnd't my W have cheated with a Sebastian or a Bartholomew?

If I am really mad at the moment, "skanky whore". Mostly just call her "her", my FWH knows who I am referring to. Sometimes, if I am feeling mean towards FWH, I call her his "girlfriend", because it causes the same prickly reaction noted here. Hey, if she wasn't your girlfriend, what was she?

t/j One of these days I may ask him how he thought of her role in his life, if not girlfriend. Friend? You don't f**k your friend. Mistress? Too exotic sounding, in my book. Nobody has a "mistress" who dresses like your mother. "Pain in the a**?" That's probably what he would cop to now. During the A, I just don't know.

To myself, I have given OW many names but when speaking about A to WH, Icall her by her name.

Seems to bother WH to hear her Name.

I ALWAYS called her by her name. I firmly believe that it rips away any illusions when you call the OW by name for both you and the WS. I seldom called her anything awful.

This. Although when feeling really angry "your girlfriend"

I may also have told him that part of me would like to say this to her (thanks Pinterest for this one):

"I would slap you but I don't want slut on my hand"

But I don't really mean it.

Why should I call her names if I'm not doing it to WH? She didn't do anything worse than him. At least she wasn't married and didn't break any vows.