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betrayedafter20 ( member #72875) posted at 5:31 PM on Sunday, September 13th, 2020
CBS I am so happy to hear this! Heartfelt congratulations. You will be amazed how free you will feel. Celebrating with you :)
Me: BW, 52, BC survivor x2
Married 20 yrs, together 25
14 yo boy Autism spectrum
16 yo typical functioning
DD#1 2/6/13 PA, False R 4+ yrs
DD#2 2/20/20 EA(mutual friend) learned of another PA same day - serial
DD#3 2 weeks later W/PA AP
Separated 5/
betrayedafter20 ( member #72875) posted at 5:35 PM on Sunday, September 13th, 2020
You figured it out. You were alone all along but putting up with a jerk. Being alone is nothing new. It's just way more pleasant.
COULD NOT BE MORE TRUE for me too. And don't be surprised how quickly you start loving the days off from the kids... (my kids are about the same ages) 
Me: BW, 52, BC survivor x2
Married 20 yrs, together 25
14 yo boy Autism spectrum
16 yo typical functioning
DD#1 2/6/13 PA, False R 4+ yrs
DD#2 2/20/20 EA(mutual friend) learned of another PA same day - serial
DD#3 2 weeks later W/PA AP
Separated 5/
BetterTimesAhead ( member #70001) posted at 11:41 PM on Sunday, September 13th, 2020
Great news! Taking that step must have been difficult but I'm glad that you are already feeling the positive results.
Enjoy your new place and your time with the kids.
Me: BS - 56 Him: WH - 57 DDAY: 2/22/2019 - Three year EA and PA Filed for D 9/2021 - signed the papers 8/2023 - time to rebuild***************An apology without the action to back it up is just manipulation.
barcher144 ( member #54935) posted at 12:28 AM on Monday, September 14th, 2020
Well I can’t believe it! I did it! I’m in my own place and it is so peaceful.
I don’t miss him and that really says a lot.
Of course he made the move as difficult as possible for me we even argued in front of the movers and I was crying for most of it, I am just happy it’s all put behind me now.
What’s interesting is I was never able to be alone when I was younger and feeling alone in the marriage all these years must have really done a number on me because I like being alone right now.
Just can’t believe I did it I have overcome my greatest fears.
Congratulations! I am VERY happy for you.
I quoted a lot of stuff (separately) because I experienced so much stuff that was similar to what you wrote.
I don't know if it is a warning or not (kinda/sorta?), but I was so happy to be separated that I experienced about 4-6 weeks of almost manic. I mean, I didn't do anything stupid like go out and buy a car because of the mania, but I was just so happy experiencing life without the burden of my STBX. Just be ready for it if it happens.
You have been through a lot of crap. Go easy on yourself, but it's going to be better now.
Me: Crap, I'm 50 years old. D-Day: August 30, 2016. Two years of false reconciliation. Divorce final: Feb 1, 2021. Re-married: December 3, 2022.
WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 12:30 AM on Monday, September 14th, 2020
I was so happy to be separated that I experienced about 4-6 weeks of almost manic. I mean, I didn't do anything stupid like go out and buy a car because of the mania, but I was just so happy experiencing life without the burden of my STBX.
I experienced this as well. Most days, I had to struggle NOT to skip like Dorothy from The wizard of Oz ...instead of walk. I just felt so light!!
I'm so proud of you, Crazy. Enjoy your new digs!! 
I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural
cantaccept ( member #37451) posted at 12:50 AM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
I am so happy for you! Congratulations! What you did was brave and awesome!
"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!
dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie
Planetx ( member #44928) posted at 2:31 AM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
So happy for you! Hope you enjoy many peaceful moments there.
DevastatedDee ( member #59873) posted at 2:33 PM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
I don't know if it is a warning or not (kinda/sorta?), but I was so happy to be separated that I experienced about 4-6 weeks of almost manic. I mean, I didn't do anything stupid like go out and buy a car because of the mania, but I was just so happy experiencing life without the burden of my STBX. Just be ready for it if it happens.
Same! I have never unpacked after moving so quickly! Within a month I had painted rooms, painted furniture, bought a gazillion yard tools, cleared the yard and planted trees and plants all over the place. I don't know what I would have done had I not had the house to obsess about, lol. I did more in that first month than I would usually do in an entire summer.
DDay: 06/07/2017
MH - RA on DDay.
Divorced a serial cheater (prostitutes and lord only knows who and what else).
gmc94 ( member #62810) posted at 4:10 PM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you, CBS.
M >25yrs/grown kids
DD1 1994 ONS prostitute
DD2 2018 exGF1 10+yrEA & 10yrPA... + exGF2 EA forever & "made out" 2017
9/18 WH hung himself- died but revived
It's rude to say "I love you" with a mouthful of lies
Somber ( member #66544) posted at 5:41 PM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
I am so happy for you. Congratulations for taking the difficult step and moving towards a healthier lifestyle for you and your kids. Enjoy those free happier stress free moments.
Me: BS, 41 / Him: SAWH, 43
2 children ages 7 and 9
“The truth is still blurry but the lies are getting clearer”
crazyblindsided (original poster member #35215) posted at 8:44 PM on Wednesday, September 16th, 2020
I have never unpacked after moving so quickly!
I had to laugh at this because I have already unpacked everything within a week I feel great though. Totally living my best life without the anchor.
Thank you to everyone for the support and congrats. It's true what they say here the fear was stronger than the action of separating. It feels good to be free!
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
betrayedafter20 ( member #72875) posted at 1:37 AM on Thursday, September 17th, 2020
I think I'm still in manic mode..
I've spent about $300 a week on stuff from homegoods and TJ maxx getting rid of stuff and changing the look of all the rooms in the house - psychologically making it "mine" ??? I'm even having trees taken out of the yard. WTH? lol not good
I don't have the budget for that, need to stop..
Me: BW, 52, BC survivor x2
Married 20 yrs, together 25
14 yo boy Autism spectrum
16 yo typical functioning
DD#1 2/6/13 PA, False R 4+ yrs
DD#2 2/20/20 EA(mutual friend) learned of another PA same day - serial
DD#3 2 weeks later W/PA AP
Separated 5/
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