I just want to say, I'm a BH.
You know what they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Now, this is just my opinion, directly from this specific male. So I hope you don't get offended by it.
My WW was about the same stats as you, when we first started dating. 5'7" at ~180 pounds. I wouldn't call her fat, but I know some would, if they compared her to twig people. She's curvy with huge boobs and ass.
Anyways, as we dated and been married. Her weight fluctuates a lot. I don't know how you ladies do it? I've been pretty much the same weight, since 10 yrs ago, lol. Anyways, I think she maxed out at 205 for some time while we were dating. We were getting married in Hawaii on the beach. She was so excited about it. So started going hardcore on a diet, with a personal trainer at the gym for a couple of months. She managed all the way down to 155 lbs. She looked great to me. Still had all her sexy parts, but more energy and felt less pain in her leg joints. I think by the time we actually got married, she was at 160.
I loved/love her, don't get me wrong. But I've also told her, I did not want an obese spouse. 205 isn't obese for her size. I told her, there's lots of reason to get away from obesity. 1, the obvious health concern. 2, one just doesn't get obese, just because. It's on purpose. It's not an "accident". 3, in my eyes, it is definitely not attractive. I know there's others who will always love their spouse, no matter the size. And some are "chubby chasers". I will always love her, I just wont find her "sexy" or appealing. And unfortunately, I/we feel that should apply to our happiness.
I asked her if she'll be perfectly happy, if I "blew up like a whale" and you couldn't find my dick under my rolls. She laughed at me and said I'll never be that big, but that's not the point. She admits, yes, she wouldn't find me attractive at that size.
I'm not saying I would ever cheat on my WW because of her size. But we talked and knew about our physical acceptance while we were still dating. It does sound very shallow stating it here. I apologize if it's not something you want to hear. But this is coming from my point of view and just giving you another angle.
Even when we're out and about. I was never rude and compared her to other people. I did one time make a comment while we were parking at the local mall. It was quiet in the cabin and we drive past this lady with her big boobs hanging out. I yelled out, "BOOBIES" and she cracked up. But other than that, I don't stare and be disrespectful to my WW, IMO.
Just so you know, my expectation is not some twig model. I do like some curves on her and at least some meat. All skins and bones is gross to touch. May look decent with clothes on, depending on build, but not my style.
I also, want to point out, I don't believe 250 lbs is "obese" for your height. I don't really know what that looks like. I can imagine using my WW's size as a reference. But the difference is, I would be talking to my wife about it before hand. I would even work out with her to try and motive. Find reasons for outdoor activity. That's what I feel 1 aspect of marriage is about. You help your spouse no matter what and they do the same. Together.
[This message edited by UneasyFeelings at 8:14 PM, February 4th (Tuesday)]