SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Yeah. I used to get bullied at school when I was a kid. That and the abuse at the hands of my mother lead to me picking up two really handy skills: Diffusing a tense situation with humor and reading people very well.

Both are great for not getting your butt kicked.

Humor is all I have these days.

Keep it, it will serve you well.

Our paths are very different, but from what I've seen, you will be fine.

Thanks!

In fact, I credit my ability to read people for being what helped me catch on to the A so quickly.

I noticed a difference in my WW immediately after she met the guy. Right off the bat, I knew something was wrong.

I know you mean humor, by the way.

So WW just emailed me and asked if I'd be willing to have an email conversation with her tonight about shock and awe (she didn't use those words) and about feelings, not what anyone has done.

I have to admit, I almost went into what I can only describe as a panic attack.

I know it's a trap. Of course it's a trap.

Deep breaths, UAB. Deep breaths...

So WW just emailed me and asked if I'd be willing to have an email conversation with her tonight about shock and awe (she didn't use those words) and about feelings, not what anyone has done.

If I understand this correctly she wants to talk about what you did wrong (shock and awe) and how she feels about it (feelings) and not what anyone has done (her having an A). Am I reading it correctly? Yea, that's meeting I'd want to attend

[This message edited by Freeme at 4:47 PM, May 19th (Tuesday)]

How about this? "We have nothing to talk about. You made your choice. Live with it. Do not try to engage me. I am done with your lies."

So WW just emailed me and asked if I'd be willing to have an email conversation with her tonight about shock and awe (she didn't use those words) and about feelings, not what anyone has done.

I have to admit, I almost went into what I can only describe as a panic attack.

I know it's a trap. Of course it's a trap.

Deep breaths, UAB. Deep breaths...

You're too busy to even respond. NC, NC, NC!

Tell her:

Good Afternoon!

Thank you for willing to communicate with me but I have already made plans for today, and honestly I don't believe communicating about your infidelity(affair) would be conducive. Please take that time in doing something far more important, like trying to help son heal, because this is hard on him. If you need validation your affair partner would be more suited to help you, thank you though, I have a great afternoon.

Thanks,

Be courteous be polite, be short.

I don't know if you've ever seen Parks and Rec. But two of the characters have "Me" days, where they go shopping and basically treat themselves.

For not responding to her request I'd go out and buy the nicest bottle of <whatever you drink>, pick up takeout from your favorite place and sit back and enjoy life knowing that you won the battle tonight basically by acting like the bigger person.

The victories hereon in will be incredible, all won by being a good guy and respecting yourself. She can't take that away from you anymore.

Fuck it, buy some champagne for yourself and pout it over your head in celebration after dinner. You've earned it.

-----------------------------

The next cold, impersonal proactive form of communication she'll get from you are the divorce papers. And oh it'll be glorious knowing that is behind you. It will burn her soul, even if she doesn't love you anymore (she hasn't for quite some time, but you know that now)

Keep it NC NC NC NC if you can but if you must use the one I did.......for you.

BUT IF YOU MUST COMMUNICATE BE ALL BUSINESS.

If you send one I gave you and responds, ignore and crickets.

NC NC NC NC NC

no no no no igotthis. No Contact means No Contact!!!

(it would feel good as shit to send I'm sure, but it'll be like McDonalds. Taste good going down, but shitting your pants for the next three hours)

lol you post faster than I do

You gotta admit she is a piece of work!!! Doesn't want to talk about what anyone has done. What the heck else is there to talk about??? Crickets chirp chirp

True Eric

your right NC NC NC NC "Crickets"

Don't respond!

If I understand this correctly she wants to talk about what you did wrong (shock and awe) and how she feels about it (feelings) and not what anyone has done (her having an A). Am I reading it correctly? Yea, that's meeting I'd want to attend

Right? I mean, dude. Sign. Me. Up.

How about this? "We have nothing to talk about. You made your choice. Live with it. Do not try to engage me. I am done with your lies."

It crossed my mind. Still, crickets.

You're too busy to even respond. NC, NC, NC!

Exactly. As Khan said in The Wrath of Khan: "Let them eat static."

Good Afternoon!

Thank you for willing to communicate with me but I have already made plans for today, and honestly I don't believe communicating about your infidelity(affair) would be conducive. Please take that time in doing something far more important, like trying to help son heal, because this is hard on him. If you need validation your affair partner would be more suited to help you, thank you though, I have a great afternoon.

Thanks,

Mmmmmmaaaaaaybe. But, I think silence speaks louder at this point.

You gotta admit she is a piece of work!!! Doesn't want to talk about what anyone has done. What the heck else is there to talk about???

I'll give it to her, as textbook as she can be, she's quite an uh... individual.

Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp. Breathe, UAB. Breathe.

She told me, "Look, it's not about the sex. To be honest, the sex is not good. If it were only about sex, I'd still be with you. You're much, much better."

Wow I wonder what OM would think?

Forward all that shit to him with a copy of the "Little Engine that Could"

I know, I know

crickets* NC

First off, that's hilarious.

Secondly, nah. He won't care. He only cares about himself and getting his rocks off. He's getting sex, so he's not caring what she thinks.

I don't know if you've ever seen Parks and Rec. But two of the characters have "Me" days, where they go shopping and basically treat themselves.

For not responding to her request I'd go out and buy the nicest bottle of <whatever you drink>, pick up takeout from your favorite place and sit back and enjoy life knowing that you won the battle tonight basically by acting like the bigger person.

The victories hereon in will be incredible, all won by being a good guy and respecting yourself. She can't take that away from you anymore.

Fuck it, buy some champagne for yourself and pout it over your head in celebration after dinner. You've earned it.

Hell yeah! I love this plan. Mexican food and Wild Turkey Rare Breed it is!

The next cold, impersonal proactive form of communication she'll get from you are the divorce papers. And oh it'll be glorious knowing that is behind you. It will burn her soul, even if she doesn't love you anymore (she hasn't for quite some time, but you know that now)

Right? Glorious.