This Topic is Archived
Ms.Martha ( member #23951) posted at 6:37 AM on Thursday, November 5th, 2009
Just reminding myself. I feel pretty low now. I say I want him to be gone, but deep down I want him. And so, I just curl up into a ball. Tomorrow I am starting the 180 all over again. I need to take care of me.
Bump for newer persons in this pain.
namvari ( new member #26047) posted at 6:38 PM on Thursday, November 5th, 2009
Thanks for bumping this. I am particularly depressed tonight .. she's still feeding him stuff that's she's pulling off my computer (I had to lock the comp again). I can't bear to stand the thought that while she's being all open and truthful to him, she insists on living a lie with me!
And to find out yesterday that my grandmother who brought me up is now warded in the hospital just made it too much to handle. 
Bumping!
BH
D-day: 29 October 2009, 11.48pm
BS (35) / WS (36)
Married: 9 years, together for 12
2 children (2 & 5)
Still afraid and struggling with guilt ...
Will Not Be Brok ( member #21553) posted at 2:19 PM on Friday, November 6th, 2009
((namvari)) The 180 is a great way to help yourself out of the pit we have all found ourselves in from time to time. It WILL get better. Believe that!
Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings while the dawn is still dark.
lyndee ( member #22802) posted at 4:51 PM on Sunday, November 15th, 2009
Me (BS)
Him (WS)
Reconciling
SerJR (original poster member #14993) posted at 6:45 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2009
Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.
lookslikeaduck ( member #12103) posted at 1:51 PM on Thursday, November 26th, 2009
BS oct 2009 ..... never make someone your priority if they only make you a option
Illinoisgirl ( member #25686) posted at 12:22 PM on Sunday, November 29th, 2009
I totally misunderstood the 180. It seemed like playing mind games to me. A few other replies to this post mention how they didn't "get" the 180 either and now (with this explanation) wish they had tried it sooner. Me too.
This post really explains it well. IMHO, it should be part of The Healing Library.
Married 12 years, together 18
WH - Recovering alcoholic
Me - Recovering wife
Reconciling?
D-Day 9-27-09
3 great kids - 12, 10 & 8
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Eleanor Roosevelt
seeking peace ( member #6693) posted at 7:49 AM on Monday, November 30th, 2009
Ditto that about putting this in the Healing Library. The piece that is currently there is a good start, but needs further explanation that the 180 is for the BS, NOT to manipulate the WS.
Thanks!
Me - BW 56
DS 22, DD 20
FIRST Dday: 10/27/04 4 LTAs & more...
Divorce final: 6/2013
KInUSA ( member #19503) posted at 4:36 PM on Tuesday, December 1st, 2009
this makes so much more sense to me and I agree - this should be in the Healing Library......
DDay 4 November 2009
DDay #2 14 December 2010
lookslikeaduck ( member #12103) posted at 8:16 AM on Thursday, December 3rd, 2009
BS oct 2009 ..... never make someone your priority if they only make you a option
tearsofjade ( member #25778) posted at 1:39 PM on Saturday, December 5th, 2009
FBW(me)48
Divorced and really happy!
The best revenge is a life lived well!
StrongHandle ( member #26477) posted at 12:48 AM on Monday, December 14th, 2009
I was having one of those off days that many of us are familiar with. This post reminded me what I am planning to get out of this situation. I am going to use this experience to find out more about myself, make some of the changes I have been waiting too long to make, and take care of myself again.
Oh, and I am also going to get in the best shape of my life durin the next six months and buy a kickass electric guitar I have been missing the last few years.
Why? Because I fucking want to. :)
Mobilejoe ( member #26438) posted at 6:27 PM on Monday, December 14th, 2009
I am finding that I am doing most of the 180 but not all of it. I have adapted it to how I am as a person and my situation.
lost_in_toronto ( member #25395) posted at 2:00 AM on Tuesday, December 15th, 2009
Me: BS/48
Him: WS/46
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 23 years.
Reconciled.
slowlymending ( member #26454) posted at 2:36 AM on Tuesday, December 15th, 2009
BW-me
Slowlymending....
Live your questions now, and perhaps without even knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers. Rilke
gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 3:27 AM on Tuesday, December 15th, 2009
This has saved many member's sanity. 
gma
BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.
gracelesslady ( member #21550) posted at 1:22 AM on Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
BW (me) 63XWH 59OW#1 28MOW#2 35OW#3 38DDay #1 Aug 2008DDay #2 Oct 2008DDay #3 Apr 2015S since Apr 2015D final Jun 2017
JVS3 ( member #20124) posted at 6:35 AM on Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
Peace is not something you wish for; It's something you make, Something you do, Something you are, And something you give away. - Robert Fulghum
As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.
nooneeverthought ( member #20157) posted at 12:48 PM on Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
it doesn't matter where you go in life ,it's who you have the beside you
wolfxsol ( member #26295) posted at 3:34 PM on Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
This Topic is Archived
