SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Yes and it is still going strong and amazing!

I did not experience HB in a physical manner at all. I couldn't even touch him without feeling ill, let alone engage in a sexual act with him.

We did experience a very emotional HB, however. I mean like, pouring our hearts out 24/7, clingy, wanting to see each other every day, cannot be separated kind of HB.

Yes for a long time.. 8-10 months. It was great until ... I found out the truth

He had lied to me about the A. He said no sex was involved. I found out months months later though I suspected.

Makes me sick now almost if he touches me.

Now he's in liver failure and he can't have sex. But I realize I still want sex often and intimacy but I can't stand his touch. Takes a lot to put out the mind movies of them together. Ugh.

Yes, a few months. Multiple revelations - no PA though - put paid to that. Now we screw more than beforehand and I don't treat her like a china doll. But the trust is gone.

yes

Yes. A couple of months.

About 6 months ago I found he'd been texting a female school friend in another state. hB after that (or maybe it was the pregnancy hormones).

Once I found out about OW and PA I never let him back in the house.(only to pick up his this things which were waiting in the hallway).

I'm all fairly new to this (both being a BS and to this forum) so this was the first I had ever heard of this phenomenon and it explains a lot!

My husband's drunken (he is a reformed alcoholic - sober four-and-a-half years) ONS that occurred over 10 years ago was only revealed to me four months ago. Guilt and the knowledge that there was a huge secret between us prompted him to come out with his confession.

I think the short answer to the question for me is YES! However, we had a fantastic sex life before D-Day and it resumed within a week and is definitely even better and more frequent than before.

It feels right and important as we attempt to move on the best we can from something that surprisingly seems to have had almost as big an impact on him as it has me.

Yes, a couple of months.

Nope. I would not reward him for his betrayal.

Nope.

We did maybe a few weeks and then boom. GONE like the wind.

Yes. for 18 MONTHS. We had "an agreement" that if circumstances changed and another party became involved we would be honest.

Guess what? he lied and was "accidentally" sleeping with both of us. That's when it ended.

he is engaged to her now, i seriously doubt she knows. Not my problem. She knew he was married when she became his shoulder to cry on.

I'm so glad it ended. It kept me stuck. My life improved once i truly let him and HB go.

Yes

Yes

Yes. She's not good at communication at all, but DDay has motivated her to try (even though there's still some deceit and trickle truthing with the A). I initiated a discussion about sexual needs, and she seemed much more comfortable and truthful with that. She said she needed affection to help her feel safe communicating about the A and her messed up emotional illiteracy. Although I think I'm going to separate, I figured I'd give it a shot. If there's any chance at R, then she's got a lot of work to do confronting the ugly truth of what she did and the work she needs to do to remain married to me. Communication is our only hope at R.

Confession: I have a STRONG sex drive, so some thinking was done with the other head too. I've asked for,encouraged, and received lots of eye contact during sex, in some pathetic attempt to ensure she's not fantasizing about AP during it. It does help to make it more intimate, and seems to work on connecting emotionally. That said, I still feel empty, betrayed, etc. Lots of things she needs to do to get me to R. Even if by some miracle she does, if I can't get back to how sex felt before DDay I'm out. EDIT: without some real growth emotionally and establishment of trust, I know I'll never feel the same way about her again.

[This message edited by outside4me at 10:06 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)]

oh yes!

Nope. At first the mind movies made me cry at the thought of being intimate. Now I just get nauseous at the thought. But then, I never was into using public facilities.

NO

I found that he had sent pictures of himself that we had taken in our bedroom for US! How he could share something so intimate between us turned me off big time. For the longest time, I couldn't even look at him in the bedroom. It took a long time for me to get past that. Even after 3 years, I really do not feel anything like desire for him.

Yes. Completely. Until today's episode with his second betrayal.