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Edie ( member #26133) posted at 9:02 AM on Friday, July 9th, 2010
punky ( member #12233) posted at 11:57 PM on Sunday, July 18th, 2010
Bumping for newly found out.
13 years later...finally healed. Definitely survived and thrived and you can, too.
JustKeepSwimmig ( member #19269) posted at 2:15 AM on Friday, July 23rd, 2010
Mr. JKS - EA/PA
DDay - April 2008
annb ( member #22386) posted at 1:25 AM on Monday, July 26th, 2010
unarmbears ( member #7480) posted at 6:28 AM on Saturday, August 7th, 2010
Bumping for the new folks.
Take care of you!
FBS-Me, 67
FWH-Him, 62
2 Sons 33 and 38
2 Daughters 36 & 31 And 5 darling grandchildren!
"Love is an impulsive act, it's free. It's the story we tell about it afterward that's our poverty." Byron Katie
Jen ( member #26584) posted at 4:48 AM on Sunday, August 8th, 2010
bump 
Me former Booger Bear ...
https://youtu.be/1TcLw3TOIN8
Hand Me Down MatchBox 20
https://youtu.be/iFdOAyyn76M
Love Falls by HellYeah
bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 3:43 PM on Tuesday, August 31st, 2010
bump
knutz ( member #28877) posted at 9:47 PM on Thursday, September 2nd, 2010
bump
Together 23 years
Married 20 Years
BW (me) 48
FWH: 49 (rSA)
2 children, 9 & 12
DDay: December 27, 2009
"Life is not what it is supposed to be. It is what it is. The way we cope with it is what makes the difference". Virginia Satir
gonogo1 ( member #25518) posted at 9:55 PM on Thursday, September 2nd, 2010
180 is for you to detach not to get back together , it gives prespective to your unique situation.In the mean time you doing 180 will be noticed by your spouse, yes it will ,you are doing something he/she doesn't expect, you are not begging , hounding etc, they wonder what's going on. Late you may want to stop 180 and make contact to see if they get it , if they don't keep it up it is for you to gain strength , and prespective.
Copied from HUFI-PUFI
Don’t listen to your head, it’s easily confused. Don’t listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.
numb&dying ( member #29254) posted at 10:00 PM on Thursday, September 2nd, 2010
Outstanding! Thanks for putting the 180 that way. I grasp the purpose more now. Thank you!
US- together since '94 (17 years)
ME- BS, 40
HIM- WS twice, 44 (& once at 40)
D-Day- 7/24/10 (EA/PA) & 12/27/06 (PA)
Status: Trying to R & get my life back, one day at time.
Crazymama ( member #24957) posted at 12:34 PM on Tuesday, September 7th, 2010
This has helped me save my sanity! It was one of the best things I could've read!
Me BS 57 DH WS 59 several ea's and search for long lost love
Married 38 yrs
D Day 07/08/09
played-a-fool ( member #29476) posted at 4:58 PM on Wednesday, September 8th, 2010
My D-Day is around 7 mos ago. I have been a total emotional mess and have acted completely opposite of the man I truly am. I'm tired of being the man I have been acting like lately. Is it too late to start my 180? Have I waited too long for it to be effective? I wonder if I start 180 now will it undo any progress we have made in our R? Our R has been slow and she has been unable to show true remorse until recently. She says its because the A happened 19 yrs ago and she has already dealt with it. She swears that there was only 1 physical encounter with him and that there have been no others and I'm supposed to just believe that and act like nothing happened. Inside I feel like starting the 180 because I'm really tired of being this pathetic man. My gut is telling me to move out for a while. I moved her out at first and ended up begging like an impotent ass. She rejected me at first but later came back although it seemed like charity. I hate that. She is now showing true remorse but I think I need to go back and give myself some measure of control over my life. Right now she is holding all the cards. I have never been in this position before and that's why I'm having doubts. I've always been very assertive and in control of myself. I want that back. What do you guys think?
[This message edited by played-a-fool at 11:04 AM, September 8th (Wednesday)]
Me - BH
Her - FWW
Trying to R
Trust is difficult to earn but so very easy to lose. It's a gift that should be treasured and guarded.
cuckhold ( member #25015) posted at 3:13 AM on Thursday, September 9th, 2010
Played, Don't think it's too late. As you probably know the 180 empowers you! It also shows your spouse you not co-dependant. Did you mention polygraph? I've read that most WSs cave when faced with that. Some even hold out until they hit the parking lot of the examiners office. I'm seriously considering it if my FWW keeps on with the "I don't know, I can't remember" bullshit!
bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 2:11 AM on Friday, September 10th, 2010
bumped for the newbies...
Cee64D ( member #21836) posted at 3:46 AM on Wednesday, September 15th, 2010
The hardest part of forgiveness is accepting it from others...
Me BH 44
Clarrissa FWW 44
D-Day 04 Oct, 2008
AttemptStrength ( member #27947) posted at 6:59 PM on Friday, October 8th, 2010
BS me
WS him x2 A's
1 autistic DS
I'd never have spent the money on a wedding dress if I knew I was just going to a costume party.
cass ( member #24261) posted at 8:08 PM on Saturday, October 23rd, 2010
DDay - April 2008
Me - 58 and doing great, alone.
Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket!
bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 5:24 PM on Sunday, October 24th, 2010
bump....
urwyfe ( member #29856) posted at 5:55 PM on Sunday, October 24th, 2010
BW 53/WH 53Married: 7/2006
together 20+ years
DD#1 9/08, Reconciled 9/09
Cheating always ends in disaster! We were able to survive the aftermath!
bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 2:46 AM on Monday, October 25th, 2010
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