SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Do you ever wonder what is happening with their R or if they are in R? MOW BH was aware of the A according to him a week before FWH told me, his WW told him. I often find myself looking at posts on SI and wondering if it could possibly be them. FWH has no interest whatsoever. MOW is no longer at same company and he has had NC since the week after she left. (she pestered regularly for "closure") Anyways does anyone else wonder and how do they deal?

[This message edited by AngelBetrayed at 6:33 PM, September 7th (Tuesday)]

I wonder, simply because the OW's husband had no idea and she lied to my husband and a part of me feels like after what she did to my marriage and others' marriages/relationships, I feel like she doesn't deserve to be happy or married.

Yes, I wonder.

But, all I really want to know is that MOW and her H are suffering.

Petty, I realize...haven't reached a place of indifference yet...or know if I ever will.

I know that OW and her BBF broke up (he didn' tknow the reason, and I still regret that I never told him). The broke up shortly after DDay #1 - because (I'm sure) Jekyll told her that they could not now 'be together.'

I also know that they never got back together. I seriously regret not telling him about the A. Sometimes I think about him and wonder how he is doing - I hope that he has moved on well and is happy in his life. I am so saddened about the hurt and pain that my husband and his girlfriend brought down on him.

Yes I often wonder this. Since I have front row seats (house is across from mine) It does kinda bum me out that they appear to be fine. Yes, I know it is only appearance who knows what is really going on.

They have added 2 more children since she confessed of 7 month A with my H 4 years ago. Last I knew she told her H it was only 1 month.

I'd love to know they were unhappy like myself. Recovery for me is next to impossible when your this close.

I have a "fake" FB account. So, I have gotten to watch fOW's life essentially fall apart without having to do anything. In some ways, it gives me all kinds of warm fuzzies and in other ways, I feel a slight bit sorry for her. I actually feel more sorry for her little girl b/c SHE is the one suffering b/c her mom is a skank

I came to know a whole lot more about the OM and his wife's relationship than I ever cared to: I called her about a month after I found out. She was not shy about telling me stuff.

She found out about 2 years before I did. She attempted to call me, it turns out, but that failed.

She thought they were in reconciliation. I shot that down when I told her I knew for a fact they (my then wife and her husband) were still an item. The drama (over and above what I was personally going through) ensued.

Near as I can tell..they are still married. Truthfully...I haven't a clue if he and my ex are still diddling or even in contact. I expect they are..to some extent. But have no proof..and don't particulary care, except as it might impact my kids.

As to their (OM and his wife) reconciliation....I don't know. However…based on what I know about him (through the emails he and my ex exchanged) and what his wife told me about him, my best guess is that it is a very uneasy “reconciliation”. They have 3 children most of whom are in college or out by now. She apparently made his affair a family affair...kind of an "intervention".

If I had to wager…I’d say once the youngest is out on her own…they are history. He appears to be a consummate liar and doesn’t much like his wife. She probably makes more money than he does (based what I know) and he wants to avoid any type of child support, even paying in total the college expenses.

Eh…just my best guess. I could be totally wrong. He may be a standup WS, worthy of bumping shoulders with those here.

Best I know, after my ex dumped the OM (before we were even officially divorced) his wife moved back in, and they are back to where they were. Still have the same house, living the good life, and reconciled. As far as you can reconcile with a douche-bag like him, I guess.

After the initial experience, I haven't paid any attention to what his life is like, or his marriage. Nor do I care.

At all.

-Defiance

Me and my FWH were just talking about this the other nite. He says that her H knew about the A.

I am with one of the other posters on here and wonder if they are suffering too. Wonder what if anything has happened to their relationship??????

It does not consume me but I do think about it from time to time!

My husbands ow is married. I told her h..the ow H had cheated on her and I think he excused it like they were even..he said no one felt worse than his wife anout the affair..uh,bullshit buddy! Her marriage was f'd up for whatever reasons and she had been cheated on so she decides 2 have an affair w/a married man and subject me 2 the same fate! She new me! She wasn't sorry when she was fu¤king my H in the back seat of her suv and then sending home to me to crawl n my bed!she wasn't feeling bad when she didn't want 2 stop f-ing my H after he told her he was done and they couldn't do what they were doing anymore.. I said exactly that 2 her H! My H is a horny piece of shit and ur wifes a whore not the victim! I hope her and her H are suffering but I doubt it cuz they r awful horrible people! Especially her she is a lying whore who tried to steal my H and thought if she just fu¤ked him enough he'd want her more..my H wasn't going to leave me or his kids for a whore! To bad he was willing to risk me and our kids for a whore though..ugh I hate her. Old fugly cougar w/a saggy face and flat ass...

I didn't have SI when I discovered the A; I stumbled upon this site 2 years into this mess. So, I did not contact OW's BH because I mistakenly did not wish to 'break up a family' (they have 2 kids). However, they subsequently divorced but have remained friends.

I found out after the fact that they had a pre-nup and if I had outed her, she might not have received the cushy D settlement. Oh well...

I've been wondering a lot, lately. I shouldn't---and usually I just hope for the best for her BH.

But my husband is job-searching---and the search has turned up opportunities in her city.

And, of course he's announced he's leaving me as soon as he finds a job.

So yeah, I do wonder what is going on in their lives--and whether it will be blown to bits soon. (If my husband does move to that city, I will give the BH a heads-up, but that's about all I can muster.)

I didn't tell MOW H, and wish I would have. It kills me to see her (she work's with WH) and it's like she's just going on her marry little way, suffering no consequences, while I'm stuck picking up the pieces of this mess they created. Now, at this point, I think it would be pointless to tell him, even though the skank is constantly targeting new meat at work. I don't have any proof. I guess what goes round will eventually come around.

Too often I wonder about POSOM's W. I know both of them. My W, DS and I travelled to Europe with them in 2007 for a conferrence that my WW and POS were attending. I often accompanied WW to holiday parties at their home.

When I found out about the A I called BW. She said she knew and that she and POS were in MC, that he said he was going to break up with my WW. She was very nice when we spoke.

I waited a few days, hoping that I would hear about some development regarding the break-up, but I never did. I called BW again, but this time her tone was totally different. She was distraught and would not speak to me. She said that I needed to talk to my W - nice idea, but I had already tried that; I would have gotten better results talking to a tree.

Two days later my WW called me and said that BW accused me of prank calling her! BW ended up changing her phone number and blocking me on FB. She treated me like a stalker or criminal, and I have no idea why.

Right before x-mas 2009, months later, BW sent me a message via FB that they were having an A. Wow, really?! I had no way to reply.

It really pissed me off, the way she treated me, because we could have been powerful allies and it seemed like WW had managed to turn even her against me! WTF!?

Yes - I wonder too. I called MOW's H and exposed their A. Both my H and OW work together. They've tried to avoid each other as much as possible - however, when staff meetings are held - she can't even look at my H. Which is a good thing in my book! Only, it makes other employees speculate what's going on. On the outside, she blows up at anyone & everyone. Obviously very irritated. I'm happy that she is irritated - she should be in a hell hole and from all outside appearances she is!

I confess I too have wondered if the MOW's M is going well. I called to talk to her BH but she answered - that conversation didn't end well. Mostly at the beginning I worried if her H kicked her out she'd turn her focus to my H and my battle would be much harder because I feared she wouldn't leave him alone.

Now when I find myself wondering I try to refocus my attention on what is important and that is my relationship with my H.

BetsyG you said...

And, of course he's announced he's leaving me as soon as he finds a job.

Why are you letting him subject you to that? You ought to kick his arse out.

I knew MOW and I wonder what is going on with them. She told her BS that the entire A was my imagination. That although she admitted kissing my husband it was an accident and nothing worthy of "my overreaction". I should have called her H and told my version of the story. Anyway as far as MOW is concerned she had no consequences.

With that being said she does still have her crappy marriage that she would complain to my husband about but I have a shiny and new husband. My husband has become such a new person that he hardly resembles the man that had the A. For this I am thankful!

I to hoped she was going through the same hell I am! As luck or karma would have I have spoken the her husband and as he was not getting the answers he needed I was able to help with that little problem While I felt very sorry for MOW's/BS when I answered his questions, I will sadly admitt I felt as though I was driving the big ass karma bus headed her way. I think I should feel bad about causing pain to anyone and before affair I would be heartly sorry for hurting anyone, but now, today, her I have no pitty.

I didn't tell MOW H, and wish I would have. It kills me to see her (she work's with WH) and it's like she's just going on her marry little way, suffering no consequences, while I'm stuck picking up the pieces of this mess they created. Now, at this point, I think it would be pointless to tell him, even though the skank is constantly targeting new meat at work. I don't have any proof. I guess what goes round will eventually come around.

I could have written this exact post. The MOW has gone on to have her first child and they bought a house in her neighbourhood. Her life seems unmarred by the A which drives me crazy!

oops that should have read "our" neighbourhood, not her