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Std train...all aboard!

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slowlymending ( member #26454) posted at 4:47 AM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

bumping for a newbie

BW-me

Slowlymending....

Live your questions now, and perhaps without even knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers. Rilke

posts: 791   ·   registered: Dec. 7th, 2009
id 5112571
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 5:30 AM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

I got my results back today. Everything was negative except for HSV-1 (cold sores).

My husband was diagnosed with Herpes 7 years ago. I have experienced what I thought were outbreaks and I ARGUED with them in the doctor's office and told them what I thought. They insisted that it is not in my system. I have been sitting here for a week thinking that they were finally going to diagnose me with HSV-2 and according to them, I don't have it. They want to refer me to a dermatologist, because they are saying that's not it.

This will be my 3rd test in 7 years with the same result. Maybe I should just stop being so paranoid. For 7 years I thought I had this and was thinking that if he and I were not together anymore for whatever reason that I would not be able to pursue another relationship and I am ok.

WH thinks that perhaps he was misdiagnosed, but we both saw an outbreak on him (or what we thought was an outbreak) a few weeks after ONS. I told him to just go get checked out again.

On a separate note, I really appreciate this post. I think that it will be very beneficial for those who need to share their stories, to those who are not diagnosed with anything. Perhaps some spouses out there will read this and take it seriously as to WHY an A is NOT a good idea.

I am going to continue to read these stories because each individual is important to me and I would love to pass the information along.

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
id 5112607
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Staggered ( member #24725) posted at 10:13 AM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

That's great news, overcoming 2003

I had my appointment yesterday afternoon. The doctor I saw was very kind and gentle.

Got some bloodwork results by email this morning - all negative so far.

Should get HPV and Pap results in the next few days.

Fingers crossed.

Forward two steps, back one.
Repeat ad nauseum.

posts: 132   ·   registered: Jul. 8th, 2009   ·   location: UK
id 5112817
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ez2bme ( member #29304) posted at 1:16 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

When the affair came out of the closet, when he admitted he had had sex with her, I had to not only endure the pain of being betrayed but suffer the humiliation of being tested for stds. Positive. I ended up having to have a hysterectomy, while I am doing that, she had a baby!!!!!!

Next time you think you are perfect, try walking on water.

posts: 97   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2010   ·   location: canada
id 5112939
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ez2bme ( member #29304) posted at 1:26 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

sorry, that didn't come out right. I tested positive, while I am being treated, it turns out she became pregnant, giving birth within a year after the truth came out, (who knows who the father is because I found out the affair continued behind my back), while she is enjoying the birth of her baby, my health deteriated to the point I needed a hysterectomy.

Next time you think you are perfect, try walking on water.

posts: 97   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2010   ·   location: canada
id 5112947
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 4:09 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

Thank you for the congrats, Staggard.

((((ez2bme))) I am sorry. That is a very hard pill to swallow and SO UNFAIR! Hold your head up!

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 4:12 PM on Friday, March 4th, 2011

Staggard good luck with the other test. Praying for you.

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 6:08 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

I am posting on this topic today, because I really feel that we should not allow this thread to die out! I think that PPGA had a great idea here and I want (NEED) it to keep going, especially for any new comers who may not see it in the forefront.

Maybe we can come up with a suggestion for the mods? How about putting together a list of 'ACCURATE' website links that talk about various STDs for the healing library, so that people have easy access to them? Just a random thought...

I appreciate everyone here that has posted their stories and have shared information.

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
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Chunk ( member #8189) posted at 6:17 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

O2003, Did you have a blood test for the HSV II?

I agree, I don't want to see this thread die. I would have appreciated it when I was going through an outbreak for the first time. I was devastated and felt alone and it was two years into R.

posts: 2772   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2005
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HowMany ( member #24506) posted at 6:20 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

Just found out last night at bedtime that my WH has been getting STD testing for the entire marriage (22 years). He said this as if STD testing is a normal blood test. I am hurt. He knew it was dangerous, took tests to determine risk, yet left me in the dark. He didn't protect me.

It NEVER occurred to me to have STD testing because I believed we were monogamous.

I wonder if he would have told me if he had gotten an STD or if he'd just let me get sick.

Your actions speak so loudly I can't hear a thing you're saying.

It must have been like throwing a hot dog down a hallway with all the room in there. - Runorstay

posts: 1289   ·   registered: Jun. 20th, 2009   ·   location: In front of the computer.
id 5116593
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13yrsGone ( member #31351) posted at 6:29 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

i am going to get tested again Friday for STDS i already know i have herpes .... i wish she had left before she gave them to me and i hope Mr. wonderful enjoys feeling like his penis is ripping in half when ever he pees when he gets his first breakout

Live for the future I know its your prerogative but when you just live for the past you become a part of it.

posts: 233   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: NC
id 5116609
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 7:08 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

Chunk, yes, I asked for very specific tests because I know that they do not test for everything unless you ask. I will give you a run down of all of the tests I had and how to read them if it will help anyone.

Howsad, that is just horrible! I am sorry that he did that to you. He thinks he protecting you by getting tested, but the only way to truly protect is not to step outside the M in the first place!

13Years, I THOUGHT for the past 7 years that I had herpes also. I lived with it. I had what I thought were outbreaks, but my doctor said that it is NOT herpes. More than likely, I am probably just allergic to my soap. I should see a dermatologist and she gave me a prescription. I have been tested 3 times in the past 7 years and on one ever said that I had HSV-2. One doctor told me that I was "exposed" but at that time they could not tell the difference between HSV-1 and HSV-2. Now they can do the antibody testing to distinguish between the two.

SO my point is, I was EXPECTING them to tell me that I had HSV-2 because of what I saw and for 7 years I believed that I did. Also my husband was diagnosed with it. BUT I don't, not even a trace and I can believe this after 3 tests. SO don't jump to conclusions. Just wait for the results. I don't think any of us here thus far are medical doctors (???), so you never know.

I requested HIV and HSV and the doctor suggested a hepatitus test.

My personal results:

HIV 1/0/2 ABS-ICMA <1.00 not reactive (therefore negative result)- no HIV

Index:

Negative <0.91

Equivocal -.091 - 1.09

Positive >1.09

My results:

HSV1, IgG 4.85 HIGH (off the charts)!

Yes I expected this, I get cold sores a couple of times a year on my lips. I hear that L-lysine (if taken regularly) can help keep those under control.

HSV-2 , my index was <0.91

Then they did a mixed text for HSV-1 and HSV-1 because some of the antigens can cross-react. My results were < 1:10

But this test was for research purposes only by the assay's manufacturer. The results should not be used for medical diagnosing because I was basically a guinea pig

I don't mind

HCV Negative 0.1

RPR non reactive

HBsAg Screen Negative

Chlamydia trachomatis Negative

Treponema Pallidum (Syphlis) Negative

Trichomonas Vaginalis Negative

Herpes subtype (HSV-1, HSV-2) Negative

Neisseria gonnorhoea Negative

They also test for other bacterial infections such as: Garnerella vaginalis Atopobium vaginae, Ureaplasm urealyticum-in which they report a negative or positive and not a number.

they also test for yeasts: Candida albicans, candida tropicalis, candida parapsilosis and candida glabrata.

Obviously, some of these tests are gender specific! I hope this helps.

[This message edited by overcoming2003 at 11:58 PM, March 7th (Monday)]

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 7:18 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

Oh yes! I miscarried in April (ectopic) and following that procedure, my OBGYN gave me a pap, which came back normal.

Because there were no abnormal cells, there was no reason to believe that I have HPV. Therefore this time around, my doctor did not test me for HPV.

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
id 5116665
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Butchannon ( member #28656) posted at 7:26 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

I contracted HPV (I have genital warts) and Chlamydia.

Me (BBF): 27, her (WGF): 24 - at least 6 months of multiple A's in the beginning of relationship, nude pictures, webcam sex
DDay: 12/21/09 - told her to leave
1 kid (BDay 09/22/09) - mine, confirmed by DNA test
STDs: HPV, Chlamydia

posts: 319   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2010   ·   location: Europe
id 5116673
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Hit_By_A_Hammer ( member #30849) posted at 7:27 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

I got high-risk HPV. Thanks, WH!

He is the only man I have ever had unprotected sex with, and there were only 2 others, a long time ago.

I've also had BV, but that definitely wasn't an STD (for me) because I was 14, and it was years before I had sex.

BS (me) 33, WH 33,1 son aged 5
OW 1 - sex twice, autumn 2000
OW 2 - not quite sex, Nov 2000
OW 3 - sex 4 times, c. 2003
OW 4 - sex on holiday, 2006, again, 2007
OW 5 - brief sexual relationship, 2008
OW 6 - sex once, c.2008
OW 7 - sex x 2, 2009/10

posts: 482   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2011
id 5116677
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Chunk ( member #8189) posted at 7:45 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

I don't recall the actual numbers of my HSV tests. I just remember that though they couldn't say who gave who what that FWH's HSV I numbers were much higher than mine. However, does it matter because HSV I is so freaking common that a lot of people come out of childhood having HSV I simply because great aunt Edna kissed them good bye when they were three years old.

What sucks is that the HSV I that I have was not where you'd typically expect it (on the mouth) but in the genital area. I never had symptoms THERE until after FWH's affair. Then about two months after the affair ended I got the first prodrome but nothing came of it (no full outbreak, just discomfort). Then about every four months I would just feel like crap, like I was coming down with something but then next day I'd feel fine. I just thought I was tired or lucky that I hadn't come down with anything.

Two and a half years into R I got the full on break out. At first it felt like a yeast infection and so I treated for that and for a day everything was fine. The day after that I had a the first blister. I looked at it and felt like passing out. I knew then and there what it was. It was exactly like the pictures you see except they weren't clusters but individual blisters (I could almost see the damn things forming before my eyes). FWH looked at it and he didn't want to believe it but come on...denial can only work when it isn't dancing on YOUR genitals.

I found a doctor took one look at it and said yep, herpes. He tested the lesions and gave me a blood test as well. We had FWH's blood tested as well. We both were negative for HSV II. Thank God for small favors since HSV I is less virulent.

I haven't had a full outbreak since the first. I've had prodromes occasionally and what feels like a potential lesion only for it to back of quickly.

During my outbreak Dermablast was my friend as was tea tree oil (soothing but strong - a little goes a LONG way).

I'm much more aware that I need to be respectful of my body and not let stress bring my immune system down (my adrenals were shot to hell after H's affair and then add the stress of the economy - I have to be vigilant about rest).

The first few months after the outbreak I was in a funk. It was like dday all over again. I wanted to punch FWH in the face. Yes, you can't prove he gave it too me. Yada, yada but let's look at the time line. Is it likely he gave it to me in that spot? Most likely. I hadn't been with another in 13 years. I pretty sure he managed to give me the gift that keeps on giving.

Now, it just another part of my life. I can't stay angry over it. It's a done deal. FWH felt like a dirty POS but he had to let that go too if we were to survive.

posts: 2772   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2005
id 5116698
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hitbyatruck ( member #23769) posted at 8:03 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

I have read before about having to ask for tests or else they wont do certain ones....sounds so stupid. If you have been put at risk why not run every test.

I will be asking to have std tests run at my next appt and I want to be sure I get ALL the tests.

Married 1998. 2 kids. First discovery 3/2009. Multiple affairs, porn addiction. one failed attempt at R. Nested for over a year. Divorce final 8/2015. XH is now married. I am engaged!

posts: 3329   ·   registered: Apr. 27th, 2009
id 5116729
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overcoming2003 ( member #30862) posted at 8:05 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

Chunk,

Thanks for sharing. All of this information is important.

posts: 318   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2011
id 5116731
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Hit_By_A_Hammer ( member #30849) posted at 8:24 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

But as far as any information I can provide: there really is no test for hpv. The only way someone can find out they have hpv is if someone shows symptoms.

There is a test for HPV - I had it. And they can then tell you what strain it is, whether it's high or low risk.

If your doctor won't do the full range of tests, either kick up a fuss, or go to a Sexual Health Clinic.

BS (me) 33, WH 33,1 son aged 5
OW 1 - sex twice, autumn 2000
OW 2 - not quite sex, Nov 2000
OW 3 - sex 4 times, c. 2003
OW 4 - sex on holiday, 2006, again, 2007
OW 5 - brief sexual relationship, 2008
OW 6 - sex once, c.2008
OW 7 - sex x 2, 2009/10

posts: 482   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2011
id 5116763
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Hit_By_A_Hammer ( member #30849) posted at 8:28 PM on Sunday, March 6th, 2011

Which begs the question: why don't they immediately screen for HPV if the test is available and accurate? If the Pap screens for potential cancer wouldn't it be more preventative to screen for the HPV virus rather than just the cancer?

It's coming in as a standard National Health Service test for all pregnant women in the next month or so, here in the UK.

BS (me) 33, WH 33,1 son aged 5
OW 1 - sex twice, autumn 2000
OW 2 - not quite sex, Nov 2000
OW 3 - sex 4 times, c. 2003
OW 4 - sex on holiday, 2006, again, 2007
OW 5 - brief sexual relationship, 2008
OW 6 - sex once, c.2008
OW 7 - sex x 2, 2009/10

posts: 482   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2011
id 5116769
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