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LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 6:46 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
I am at my IC appointment and I am sure he was suspecting to see both WW and I. After this appointment going to meet with lawyer and file... Moving on sucks even if it is for the best... Supposedly.
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 7:10 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Stay strong LS. It is hard to imagine things beyond your current feelings. Best of luck to you.
ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 7:12 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Sending strength and prayers...
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 7:13 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Hang in there, LS... sending you strength.
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 7:15 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
The first few steps are always the hardest, LS. Knowing you are moving forward, for YOURSELF, is one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves. It's just some times hard to see at the moment.
We've got your back, lean on us.
Sending strength.
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
1Faith ( member #38975) posted at 7:24 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Your SI family is with you in thoughts and prayers.
(((hugs)))
Sometimes my life feels like a test I didn't study for
veronique12 ( member #42185) posted at 7:29 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
BW, D-Day: 11/29/13 (4 month EA discovered); 12/19/13 (discovered was also PA); TT thru 2/14
Married: 2001; Together for 20 years
2 beautiful young kids
FrmrBH80124 ( member #42967) posted at 7:31 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Hang in there LS! Better days are ahead! You deserve better. Go out there and get it. 
ME - BH 45
Her - XWS 30
D - April 2010 - never looked back and good riddance.
Happily remarried!
Though much is taken, much abides; and though we are not now that strength which in old days
moved earth and heaven, that which we are,
FrmrBH80124 ( member #42967) posted at 7:32 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Hang in there LS! Better days are ahead! You deserve better. Go out there and get it.
You've given her many chances to change and she hasn't. It's time for you to do what you need to do to move on. We're here for you!
ME - BH 45
Her - XWS 30
D - April 2010 - never looked back and good riddance.
Happily remarried!
Though much is taken, much abides; and though we are not now that strength which in old days
moved earth and heaven, that which we are,
kiki1 ( member #37184) posted at 7:33 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
cantaccept ( member #37451) posted at 7:37 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Hi LS,
The one thing I have been realizing lately, even though I am doing what is good for me, it is still really, really hard and it hurts.
I am so sorry that you have to go through this.
You can do it though and you will, with the passing of time, hurt less.
Wishing you peace and confidence.
Can
"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!
dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 9:01 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Just got back from MC/IC. He saw she wasn't there and then he gave me his perspective on her.
*Defensive of her affairs
*Very Cold
*Doesn't Understand my pain or cares about my pain
*Very Very Broken
I was sitting there and she texted me and I said I am at IC. She said, why didn't you remind me...
IC said, why didn't she remind herself, in fact why isn't she the one making the appointments and search for counseling.
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
1Faith ( member #38975) posted at 9:05 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
why didn't she remind herself, in fact why isn't she the one making the appointments and search for counseling
^^^This.... 
So sorry.
Sometimes my life feels like a test I didn't study for
cantaccept ( member #37451) posted at 9:08 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
I am so sorry.
It is another conflict, it helps to have your gut, your perceptions validated, it hurts to have your perceptions and gut validated.
My IC/MC said similar to me about wh the day before dday #2.
You really will get through this. You deserve so much more than this.
(((LS)))
"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!
dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie
FrmrBH80124 ( member #42967) posted at 9:10 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
IC said, why didn't she remind herself, in fact why isn't she the one making the appointments and search for counseling.
^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^
All you need to know. I'm so sorry LS but better days are ahead!
ME - BH 45
Her - XWS 30
D - April 2010 - never looked back and good riddance.
Happily remarried!
Though much is taken, much abides; and though we are not now that strength which in old days
moved earth and heaven, that which we are,
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 9:38 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
(((LS)))
Validation from the IC/MC. That right there has to tell you that you are making the right choice.
It's ok to hurt and grieve. You need to, but you also need to look at this as a positive step forward for you, for your daughter, a for the rest of your life.
You are no longer going to be abused, emotionally beaten down, or given false hope from her.
You can go into the future strong, and healed, and you will never feel the need to tolerate less than you deserve ever again.
It's time for LS to heal, and find happy. It can be done.
(((and strength))))
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 10:36 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
Yea, it is sad to say. He thinks she could change, but for now wants me to work on grieving and making sure the Affairs don't identify me.
I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...
ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 10:38 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
needfriendshere ( member #43350) posted at 10:38 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
(((LostSamurai)))
When I read your post, it made me cry - hard. It's been one of those days. My heart goes out to you. Hang in there, my friend. There will be better days ahead for you - I know that with all my being!!
Me: early 50'sWH: early 50'sMarried: 23 yearsDS: 21 years oldOther DS: 18 years oldD-day: 2/14/2014H's LTA lasted 6 years, his EA's lasted during most of our M, but we are both trying hard to R.
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 10:41 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
You can do it. We're all here for you. (((LS)))
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
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