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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 11:34 PM on Wednesday, July 9th, 2014
You've been on my mind today, Angel. Sending you strength and comfort. ((((((hugs))))))
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
lovedmesomehim ( member #25743) posted at 2:24 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Angel,
I just saw your post today and I am so very sorry.
No other words, but from a mother to another mother, I cannot imagine how painful this must be for you.
Please try to surround yourself with those who loved you and also loved your sweet baby.
(((Angel77)))
Lovedmesomehim
[This message edited by lovedmesomehim at 8:25 PM, July 9th (Wednesday)]
staystrong101 ( member #41068) posted at 2:35 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
I am so incredibly sorry. This post literally brought tears to my eyes. Life seems so unfair sometimes. I'm thinking of you.
Angel177 (original poster member #37274) posted at 4:49 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Thank you everyone. The viewing yesterday was the most difficult part. He didn't look at all like himself but he looked a little better then when I found him in the crib. I held him, I rocked him, I sang to him, I kissed him and told him how much I loved him. It all just felt so unreal and so beyond unfair. I really can't put into words what it's like holding your dead child...there just are no words.
Today was draining but I have never felt support like this. The place was packed 150 people at least I'm sure and many more wanted to come and sent messages of support but unfortunately the world doesn't stop so many couldn't make it. Friends of ours who lost their son 10 years ago (who our son was named after) came cross country to attend and we didn't know they were coming. We held each other and cried for our sons....sharing the pain with someone who has been there makes it feel a little lighter. They also give us strength because they have continued living after their sons death and I know that we must too. This can't destroy us...we have other children to think about and our whole lives ahead of us to live (I'm 27).
There are moments I lose it completely of course. I feel physical pain over this. My heart isn't in anything I do but I need to keep doing things...fun things with my daughter even if I don't enjoy them right now. I feel like a zombie sometimes....can't focus...I keep forgetting where I put things or what I came into a room to do. I feel disoriented. My house is a disaster and I just can't find any motivation to clean it.
It's going to be a long road.
Me:BS
Him:WH
D-Day Sept. 14/12...R started Dec. 3/12
D-Day 2 Oct. 12/19 different OW
In limbo
CheaterMagnet ( member #33581) posted at 4:57 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Sending you peace and strength.
If Happy Ever After did exist, I would still be holding you like this.
All those fairly tales are full of shit.
One more fucking love song I'll be sick. ~ Maroon 5
FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 4:57 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire
143ANF ( member #22730) posted at 5:40 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know there isn't anything I can say or do that will ease your pain.
I also lost an infant son. You're absolutely right, you can't let this destroy you. It may not feel like it today or tomorrow, but life does go on.
Please take care of yourself. You and your family are in my prayers.
Me: BS 49
FWXH 45
Divorced 05/20/2010
Last D-Day and the end 09/29/2015
Hrtbrken1 ( member #33802) posted at 5:41 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Oh hon, just hold your daughter close right now. Nothing else matters. The house doesn't matter at all. I'll be praying for your family and your son. We're here for you.
Me-BW
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with
friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 6:50 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
wannabenormal ( member #19772) posted at 6:56 AM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Angel - I really don't even know what to say other than I'm so sorry. (((Angel and family)))
devasted30 ( member #39439) posted at 12:34 PM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
((((Angel177)))) thinking about you
And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!
yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 12:54 PM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Thinking of you. Sending you strength and peace.
"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 5:46 PM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
((((Angel)))) I'm so glad your friends came to be with you. Losing a child is a terrible bond to share, but knowing that they have dealt with it and are continuing to live their lives must be a comfort to you.
Holding you all in my thoughts today.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 6:12 PM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
Thinking of you and your family Angel.
Sunnydaysahead ( member #43756) posted at 8:15 PM on Thursday, July 10th, 2014
((Angel177))
Peace and strength.....many prayers for your family and sweet baby boy.
Sal1995 ( member #39099) posted at 12:51 AM on Friday, July 11th, 2014
God bless you Angel. Your strength comes through in your posts. You and your family remain in my thoughts and prayers.
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 12:58 AM on Friday, July 11th, 2014
(((Angel177)))
Sending you thoughts of strength, comfort and peace.
AML04 ( member #39682) posted at 2:19 AM on Friday, July 11th, 2014
My heart breaks for you. Let the love of your daughter fill your heart. Sending strength to you and your family.
(((Angel)))
Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
Met 2000, Married 2004
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13
Hopeful for R
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 2:47 AM on Friday, July 11th, 2014
(((Angel)))
Thinking of you and keeping you in my heart.
hill ( member #12166) posted at 3:54 PM on Friday, July 11th, 2014
(((Angel)))
I am so very sorry. I wish I had something more profound and comforting, but you and your family are in my thoughts.
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