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My FWW came home from a business trip last Thursday. She was at a sales convention for 4 days. Periodically I back up our phones using IC&&&& software to keep from losing our pictures and contacts. While doing this on Saturday night I saw some names on her text messages that I hadn’t seen before, but then again she was just at a sales meeting. I would expect that. Sunday Morning, her phone was temporarily locked, which she never does. I was trying to help her put in her business cards onto her contacts later in the evening and noticed that most of her text messages for last week were erased. I asked her last night why they were erased and she said that she was worried that I would see them and be concerned about who she was texting, but that everything was benign. That didn’t sit well with me.

She has a Motorola LG D850 through ATT. How do I recover these text messages?

Do any WS erase text messages if the contents are benign?

I think it's fishy. Follow your gut. There is NO reason to erase benign texts. Zero.

Sounds guilty to me. Time to recover the messages.

Ask how in the Investigations forum.

It would be less likely that you would be concerned about the text messages if she had left them and you could read them, rather than delete them. only reason to delete them specifically for your benefit, is she is scared or embarrassed about what was on them. Id be concerned.

Try to google: how to retrieve text messages from Motorola LG D850. Good luck ! Not likely she would delete texts that are 'benign.' If they are benign, why delete them ? She says you would have misunderstood them ? Doubtful; you most likely would have totally understood them, thus her deleting them. As they say, "Where there's smoke, there's fire." Keep digging.

Did she use her business trips are cover for her affair?

Again, if she's cheating again is it a dealbreaker?

Seems kinda sketchy. I'd investigate further. Trust your gut, hon.

Red flag. Sorry, but she is completely full of shit.

((((Greyson))))

Huge red flags.

I and several other posters have had some success with a program called Dr Fone.

Good luck.

I am not a techie, but I would tell her you have the app necessary to retrieve those messages and see her reaction. My guess is she will go nuts and tell you that you are being unreasonable.

What is unreasonable and unacceptable is her going out of town and then deleting messages . If they were so benign she actually could have been transparent and rebuil;t trust be wanting you to see them

She is up to no good. You can take that to the bank

I agree - total red flag.

Google how to retrieve deleted texts using the make and model of her phone. There are versions for android and iPhone and trial version is free. Tell her you are doing this - her reaction will tell you all you need to know. I still remember my FWS's face when I told her I knew how to do

It.

DrFone has success in un-deleting texts.

But I sure wouldn't tell her I was going to do it before you do it. Her reaction is immaterial - what you find in the texts is not.

You should never tip your hand.

Just the fact that she was deleting things would probabaly be enough to get me to revist my lawyet. If you hadn't been backing stuff up, you never would have found out. How many other things is she hiding?

Benign? Not likely. Why delete them then?

Strength

My H deleted everything there is not a trace of any conversation with OW at all. However OW kept everything and since its over between the two of them she has been happy to part with them.

Locking her phone would be sending of alarm bells with me.

Dr. Fone. Today.

Do any WS erase text messages if the contents are benign?

No.

and she said that she was worried that I would see them and be concerned about who she was texting, but that everything was benign.

I got that exact line from The Princess. I chose to believe it at the time, but now I recognize it for the horseshit that it is.

I asked her last night why they were erased and she said that she was worried that I would see them and be concerned about who she was texting, but that everything was benign. That didn’t sit well with me.

It shouldn't.

She's still controlling things - what you do and don't see so that she can control how you feel about it. She's "worried"that *you'll* be concerned, so she just removes your ability to see them at all. While blameshifting you

It isn't remorseful behavior, and it doesn't allow you to build trust.

As it typical for me, I am going to go against the grain here. My H recently deleted text messages. I definitely smelled smoke, especially bc they were from a girl I specifically told him not to delete. She had never done anything inappropriate, but she seemed needy, and that is enough now to make me hypervigilant. I demanded my H promptly bring his phone to a data recovery specialist when Dr. Fone did not work (phone model was not supported). Eventually we recovered the messages (screen shots from the texter) and I checked them against the phone records to make sure they were all there. And you know what...there was no fire, sort of. The messages were harmless. BUT, he was afraid that I might "overreact" that this girl was texting him in a harmless, friendly, school acquaintance way. So THAT was the fire...my H lied by omission, because he was scared of my reaction, that is totally righteous in our situation. He wasn't cheating again and she hadn't really crossed any boundaries, and there was nothing to worry about there EXCEPT how he handled it. That was where the problem was. So my recommendation to you is this: recover the texts. They might be harmless, but the WAY your wife handled them is not. That is where the problem is, even if there is no further infidelity.

You stated she is a FWW. It sure is not looking like that. She clearly knew what was in those text messages would bother you. It takes more work to hide and deceive someone that it does to be honest.

I would use the application that other suggested and I would not tell her about it until after you have examined everything.

This is just one of the many reasons I do no support staying with a cheater. They never really do the hard work to fix themselves and in the end your the one to blame.

C