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I tip my hat to you with your last comments Westway. With all the crap you have had to wade through, you have not let it leave a nasty stain.

You have been able to process this wretched situation better then a lot of us were able to.

But then you have had a lot more support, encouragement and direction given than some of us.(just to ensure that you don't get a head swell...)☺😱

I meant to ask, What happened with the lady you hooked up with? Are you guys dating now or just casual????

I want to be clear my comment wasn't addressed to WestWay. It was about the "boner bait" comment. I'm sure the actress(s) and other women would be ecstatic to know they are boner bait to some creep. I'm sure they would swoon.

I've called my XWW as many bad things I could think of and maybe even made some up. She harmed me. I wouldn't bring any other woman into the equation. They never harmed me so terribly.

[This message edited by steadychevy at 3:57 PM, May 5th (Tuesday)]

dblackstar2002

I meant to ask, What happened with the lady you hooked up with? Are you guys dating now or just casual????

Just casual FWBs. We aren't a steady thing. We have hooked up three times so far. We hook up on one night every two weeks or so at her house. She is a divorcee who's ex-husband cheated on her, so she knows my plight. Nice gal and very good looking. She has decided she will never marry again for the rest of her life.

steadychevy

I want to be clear my comment wasn't addressed to WestWay. It was about the "boner bait" comment. I'm sure the actress(s) and other women would be ecstatic to know they are boner bait to some creep. I'm sure they would swoon.

I've called my XWW as many bad things I could think of and maybe even made some up. She harmed me. I wouldn't bring any other woman into the equation. They never harmed me so terribly.

I wasn't offended.

You know what I want her to do? I want for us to get a divorce, then I want her to date black men until she finds a good black man who she will be compatible with and who will take care of her. I want her to defy her family and settle down with him and live in peace so she can be a decent mother to our daughters, and start living a life of honesty.

I wish that would happen, but I don't see it as likely.

Her problem is not simply that she likes "black men" and her family is racist so they won't accept it.

It's way deeper than that. She has a lack of morals, empathy, and decency. Incredibly selfish. No respect for the man who took such good care of her.

A good black man isn't going to change that, and a good black man won't put up with that unless she hides it from him the way she did with you.

No, what she is, is a woman who wants more and doesn't care who she hurts to get it. She'll cheat on the black guy too even if she "goes public" as an interracial couple.

She’s always going to be looking for the new shiny.

But never finding it.

Well as a Black man myself I wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole if you paid me. No offense.

It's been my experience, both on these threads and IRL, that the cheater actually thrives on the dishonesty, the sneaking around etc.

To hope that your WW will lead a honest life in the future is noble, but I am afraid not likely.

Cheaters tend to drift toward a life of deceit for some strange reason. Just my opinion.

“this middle-aged WW with no marketable skills or education, who currently makes a pittance at her job, has decided to give up her M of 21 years, her family, her children, and a comfortable life, to pursue random, secret hookups with black men for the next, oh say, twenty to thirty years. She can never openly date or live with anyone of her preference for fear of family backlash. She will have to spend her time hiding and pursuing random hookups away from friends and family, while living on a pittance and whatever spousal support she can get in the D.

Does this sound like the reasoning of a rationale person? Of course not. Like so many cheaters, her fantasy life will be a nightmare. Your WW is either having serious mental issues or she has the IQ of an ironing board, if she thinks she has a future with these random hookups. But that is not your problem, nor is her mental illness.”

I wrote this to you back on October 8th and it still rings true to me, including the mental illness. Wishing you all the best moving forward Westway. You have handled yourself well.

That's because, JS, being honourable and having integrity has nothing to do with ethnicity.

Glad to hear you're still on track Westway. Like others have said, your STBX will continue to wallow as long as she continues to live her lie. The best thing you or anyone else can do for her is to allow her to dig herself to the bottom of the barrel. She needs to reach a point where the only way is up. That's when she'll finally see the light and hopefully realize what's important in life. Then she can start the rebuilding process on a firm mental foundation. Continue to take care of yourself. You have a great future ahead of you. Make it better than it's ever been.

Well as a Black man myself I wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole if you paid me. No offense.

That is strangely comforting. Thanks man. Yeah, and it just proves my theory that decent men, regardless of race, don't want a promiscuous woman like her.

I wrote this to you back on October 8th and it still rings true to me, including the mental illness. Wishing you all the best moving forward Westway. You have handled yourself well.

Thanks again. Yeah I don't know if it is mental illness or just selfishness and depravity. I think she's just an asshole, and I don't want to be married to an asshole anymore.

Glad to hear you're still on track Westway. Like others have said, your STBX will continue to wallow as long as she continues to live her lie. The best thing you or anyone else can do for her is to allow her to dig herself to the bottom of the barrel. She needs to reach a point where the only way is up. That's when she'll finally see the light and hopefully realize what's important in life. Then she can start the rebuilding process on a firm mental foundation. Continue to take care of yourself. You have a great future ahead of you. Make it better than it's ever been.

Or she ends up alone, living in that house with 30 cats. I can actually see that happening once she is used up and she can no longer fall back on her good looks.

This is so true WW! I will bet she is seeing what a good man she has lost. Guys will probably line up to bag her, But any man wanted a serious relationship, Won't give her any serious thought. Guys looking for a wife don't usually willingly marry women who have cheated on their previous husband!!!

30 black cats!

Actually when it comes to cats she takes all comers. She has four now.

30 black Tom cats.

^^^ What was said^^^

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