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truthdisinterred (original poster new member #71857) posted at 7:24 AM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I’ve been a lurker here for the past couple months, and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one. Therefore, on behalf of all the lurkers, I just wanted to thank everyone who’s brave enough to share their stories and kind enough to respond to others. Your posts bring hope and healing to far more people than you probably realize.
Even though I’ve read countless books and articles on infidelity since my own DD last year (May 2018), there’s something far more therapeutic and comforting about reading the personal and interactive accounts on this site and realizing that others can truly relate to you in real time – regardless of the hour. My only regret is that I didn't find this site sooner. I love and appreciate all of the candor, wisdom, wit, empathy, encouragement, humor, etc… found in these forums, and I thought it was only right to let you all know.
So, with the utmost sincerity and gratitude – THANK YOU!!!
Best wishes to all of you!
I'll take the cold truth over a warm lie any day.
EllieKMAS ( member #68900) posted at 8:05 AM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I wish more lurkers would come on in. But it does make me happy to know that people get positive takeaway from SI even if they aren't posting. That old saying "misery loves company"... I didn't really understand that before this.
This site has saved my life and my sanity and my emotional and mental health since very shortly after DDay1 (Nov 7 2018). I don't know how I would have survived the infidelity shit show without it. There is something immensely comforting to me in knowing there are so many other people that 'get it'.
Glad you came in and took a seat with us and quit being a lurky lurkerton, truthdisinterred!
PS: I love your name - very cool 
"No, it's you mothafucka, here's a list of reasons why." – Iliza Schlesinger
"The love that you lost isn't worth what it cost and in time you'll be glad that it's gone." – Linkin Park
hopefullife ( member #71881) posted at 9:26 AM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I remember the day I found SI. I just felt this pull that I had to sign up to tell my story. It's one of the best things I did. I can't thank SI enough for all the support I got here, whether by just reading or actually interacting. I shared my shituation with close friends and family, but talking to people who knows exactly I'm going through, lifts me and gives me the strength to survive it all.
To all the lurkers out there, join us, whenever you're ready.
10 yrs together. 2 yrs married. No kids.
2 Ddays. H living with OW and their child.
Focusing on self.
truthdisinterred (original poster new member #71857) posted at 10:55 AM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
Glad you came in and took a seat with us and quit being a lurky lurkerton, truthdisinterred!
Lol, thank you, EllieKMAS! I'm glad I came out, too!
I just felt this pull that I had to sign up to tell my story. It's one of the best things I did.
Sounds like a win-win! Thank you for sharing, hopefullife!
Have a great weekend, everyone! 
[This message edited by truthdisinterred at 3:58 PM, November 16th (Saturday)]
I'll take the cold truth over a warm lie any day.
Oldwounds ( member #54486) posted at 7:53 PM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I think I was a lurker for about three weeks, maybe a month.
And I was certain I would stay in lurker status. I couldn't imagine talking about my devastation online with 'strangers' or anyone else for that matter.
Then I read someone tell their story that was so exacting, so close to mine, I had to sign up and chime in to let that person know they weren't alone.
Now, I type too much, too often.
But it's great therapy!
Married 36+ years, together 41+ years
Two awesome adult sons.
Dday 6/16 4-year LTA Survived.
M Restored
"It is better to conquer our grief than to deceive it." — Seneca
Thumos ( member #69668) posted at 9:05 PM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I was a lurker for three years. Too long. It was only after I shared my story and my pain and started getting real feedback in real time when things began to shake loose and change for me. If you’re lurking, which I totally understand, consider not lurking. Once you start typing things out in black and white and get some real perspective and advice you might be surprised at how much more clearly you start thinking about your own situation.
"True character is revealed in the choices a human being makes under pressure. The greater the pressure, the deeper the revelation, the truer the choice to the character's essential nature."
BH: 50, WW: 49 Wed: Feb.'96 DDAY1: 12.20.16 DDAY2: 12.23.19
truthdisinterred (original poster new member #71857) posted at 9:07 PM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
Then I read someone tell their story that was so exacting, so close to mine, I had to sign up and chime in to let that person know they weren't alone.
Same here, Oldwounds. It's comforting (but also heartbreaking) to know that others share such similar experiences. In an ideal world, sites like this wouldn't be necessary, but since we don't live an in ideal world, I'm grateful for the resources and support that SI provides. Best wishes to you!
Thumos, what was it that finally made you decide to share?
[This message edited by truthdisinterred at 3:58 PM, November 16th (Saturday)]
I'll take the cold truth over a warm lie any day.
IHatePickingName ( member #70740) posted at 10:53 PM on Saturday, November 16th, 2019
I lurk a lot. I am also grateful to those who post more. Thank you ❤️
BW/WW Me
WH/BH DoingThingsWrong
DDay March 2019
Reconciling
1girlsmom ( member #63541) posted at 1:32 AM on Sunday, November 17th, 2019
I lurked for a few days & then posted but got some pretty hard (for me) to hear responses so I stopped posting.
It just hurt too deeply.
I was already having some suicidal ideation & I tend to self harm if things get out of control or too much for me to process at once.
I have terrible coping skills, therefore I had to just read, not post about my situation.
Reading helps, so ya, keep reading!
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