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General :
Disturbed by troll revelations

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Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 11:53 PM on Sunday, February 9th, 2020

I see red & want to pinch those people really hard.

...no more swordcane suggestions from me... wouldn't need one anyway if you got a hulk pinch.

It feels like we're lab rats for data mining.

Yeah, I avoid those. Last thing I want is for one of my fart analogies to end up on the cover of a magazine.

BH
DDAY Mar 2014
Widowed 2022 - breast cancer

posts: 13534   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2014   ·   location: Washington State
id 8507788
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 MalibuBayBreeze (original poster member #52124) posted at 12:11 AM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

NTV

Or as an ad for a Gastropub

A man or woman telling the truth doesn't mind being questioned.

A liar does.

posts: 3615   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2016   ·   location: Somewhere in the NorthEast
id 8507797
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cocoplus5nuts ( member #45796) posted at 2:38 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

How does some basement-dwelling fuckwit writing fiction on a help board make a fool of you?

I tend to get personal with my posts. I talk about my experience with my H. Believe it or not, I'm actually quite a private person. I feel very vulnerable when I post that stuff. 🤷‍♀️

[This message edited by cocoplus5nuts at 7:41 PM, February 10th (Monday)]

Me(BW): 1970
WH(caveman): 1970
Married June, 2000
DDay#1 June 8, 2014 EA
DDay#2 12/05/14 confessed to sex before polygraph
Status: just living my life

posts: 6900   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2014   ·   location: Virginia
id 8507929
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Mr. Kite ( member #28840) posted at 4:35 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

As a former admin and mod on two popular NFL sites, I can tell you from personal experience that it's an incredible amount of work and is usually done for free. My respect goes out to all the admins, mods, and guides on this site who put in all that time and effort to keep the rest of us safe.

There are people on the internet who are lonely, emotionally broken, mentally ill, and some downright sociopathic. They are the turds in the punch bowl but are in the vast minority. Although it is impossible to keep them out 100% of the time, I refuse to allow them to ruin my journey through infidelity.

I don't post as often as I used to but that's only because I've noticed that if I wait a couple of minutes, some other member will not only post exactly what I was thinking but put it in a much better way.

I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you what not to do.

posts: 1173   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2010   ·   location: Mid-Atlantic
id 8507996
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sassylee ( member #45766) posted at 6:20 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Thank you Mr. Kite. You definitely understand the role. Your appreciation helps sustain us when we have rough days.

My R(eformed)WH had a 5 month EA in 2012
In my 7th year of R
“LOVE is a commitment, not an emotion. It is a conscious act of a covenant of unconditional love. It is a mindset and a thought process.” - BigHeart2018’s Professor

posts: 11459   ·   registered: Nov. 29th, 2014   ·   location: 🇨🇦
id 8508045
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Lalagirl ( member #14576) posted at 6:45 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Just had a thought pop into my head...

I wonder if there are "couples" on SI - a BS and WS posting together - who are really one person. These folks get a lot of attention - just what trolls like.

Dun dun dun.....

2025: Me-59 FWH-61 Married 41 years grown daughters- 41 & 37. 1 GS,11yo GD & 9yo GD (DD40); Five grands ages 15 to 8. D-day #1-1/06; D-day #2-3/07 Reconciled! Construction Complete. Astra inclinant, sed non obligant

posts: 8905   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2007
id 8508061
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 MalibuBayBreeze (original poster member #52124) posted at 8:36 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Lalagirl

Interesting and likely very possible.

Sassy

You need to empty out your messages! Tried to PM you but you're at your limit.

A man or woman telling the truth doesn't mind being questioned.

A liar does.

posts: 3615   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2016   ·   location: Somewhere in the NorthEast
id 8508131
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Dorothy123 ( member #53116) posted at 9:28 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

To the trolls ......

"I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!" Wicked Witch of the West.

posts: 5583   ·   registered: May. 7th, 2016   ·   location: a happy place
id 8508174
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sassylee ( member #45766) posted at 9:28 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Sorry MBB! MangledHeart has had the same frustrations trying to PM me! I’m a bit of a message hoarder. I’ll go see if I can part with a few!

My R(eformed)WH had a 5 month EA in 2012
In my 7th year of R
“LOVE is a commitment, not an emotion. It is a conscious act of a covenant of unconditional love. It is a mindset and a thought process.” - BigHeart2018’s Professor

posts: 11459   ·   registered: Nov. 29th, 2014   ·   location: 🇨🇦
id 8508175
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sassylee ( member #45766) posted at 9:42 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Should be good now MBB!

My R(eformed)WH had a 5 month EA in 2012
In my 7th year of R
“LOVE is a commitment, not an emotion. It is a conscious act of a covenant of unconditional love. It is a mindset and a thought process.” - BigHeart2018’s Professor

posts: 11459   ·   registered: Nov. 29th, 2014   ·   location: 🇨🇦
id 8508190
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Mr. Kite ( member #28840) posted at 9:47 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Thank you Mr. Kite. You definitely understand the role. Your appreciation helps sustain us when we have rough days.

You're most certainly welcome. What you all do here is of utmost importance and in many cases life-changing to multiple individuals caught up in the heartbreak of infidelity.

I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you what not to do.

posts: 1173   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2010   ·   location: Mid-Atlantic
id 8508198
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 MalibuBayBreeze (original poster member #52124) posted at 9:57 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

Sassy

PM'd you. I get it, I'm a message hoarder too. Actually wish we could save more because so many have sent me amazing heartfelt messages.

Ohhh a monkey GIF. How cute. I'm sure that's really going to rattle the cages of the trolls.

A man or woman telling the truth doesn't mind being questioned.

A liar does.

posts: 3615   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2016   ·   location: Somewhere in the NorthEast
id 8508209
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WalkinOnEggshelz ( member #29447) posted at 9:58 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

I wonder if there are "couples" on SI - a BS and WS posting together - who are really one person. These folks get a lot of attention - just what trolls like.

It has happened, but I would hate for couples who both post to be under any scrutiny as a troll. Without SI, HT and I would not be where we are today. This site has served both of us in ways we can’t explain and can not thank DS and MH enough for. It’s exactly why we both are still active members here a decade later.

If you keep asking people to give you the benefit of the doubt, they will eventually start to doubt your benefit.

posts: 16686   ·   registered: Aug. 27th, 2010   ·   location: Anywhere and everywhere
id 8508210
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forgettableDad ( member #72192) posted at 11:07 PM on Monday, February 10th, 2020

I think I posted this on another thread a while ago; oldie but goodie. And explains internet trolls perfectly...

posts: 309   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2019
id 8508266
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Thanksgiving2016 ( member #63462) posted at 12:59 AM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

^^^ hilarious 🤣

posts: 697   ·   registered: Apr. 17th, 2018
id 8508314
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Neanderthal ( member #71141) posted at 1:21 AM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

I wonder if there are "couples" on SI - a BS and WS posting together - who are really one person. These folks get a lot of attention - just what trolls like.

I wish I didn't feel the need to prove that my wife and I are real. If there is some way to become a verified member, I'd be all for it.

Edit: jeez does this post seem troll like?

[This message edited by Neanderthal at 7:41 PM, February 10th (Monday)]

Me: WS/BS

posts: 439   ·   registered: Jul. 30th, 2019   ·   location: OK
id 8508319
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HoldingTogether ( member #29429) posted at 2:18 AM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

What? Couple trolls???? Uh...

Us-Reconciled.
You keep waiting for the dust to settle, and then, one day you realize... This is it, that dust is your life going on around you.

posts: 10000   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010   ·   location: New Life
id 8508334
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Lalagirl ( member #14576) posted at 1:17 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

I wish I didn't feel the need to prove that my wife and I are real.

No need. I was not referring to you and your wife; there are many BS/WS couples on this site. I was asking a question that referred to the subject of this thread. Just a thought that I put in writing.

I have been here a very long time and after I healed, I have extended my help to both BSs and WSs freely and happily. I like to pay it forward because SI literally saved my life.

When these recent trolls were discovered, I was in the camp that the OP was in - quite upset and felt pretty foolish for extending my support to them. However, after sitting on my pride for a bit, while it has been disheartening to see so much troll activity (although it's always been there, it seems more prevalent in the past year or two), even if it/they is/are a troll(s), the material posted may help other members.

2025: Me-59 FWH-61 Married 41 years grown daughters- 41 & 37. 1 GS,11yo GD & 9yo GD (DD40); Five grands ages 15 to 8. D-day #1-1/06; D-day #2-3/07 Reconciled! Construction Complete. Astra inclinant, sed non obligant

posts: 8905   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2007
id 8508450
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 MalibuBayBreeze (original poster member #52124) posted at 6:56 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

forgettableDad

Yes I think that nails it!

Neanderthal

No, you don't. I'm not aware of many couples here and honestly find myself envious of those that are because it means the WS cares enough to really find out their whys and work out their issues which I think is great. My WH would never put himself out there like that. Gotta maintain that narcissistic image after all.

A man or woman telling the truth doesn't mind being questioned.

A liar does.

posts: 3615   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2016   ·   location: Somewhere in the NorthEast
id 8508620
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MrsWalloped ( member #62313) posted at 8:45 PM on Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

When these recent trolls were discovered, I was in the camp that the OP was in - quite upset and felt pretty foolish for extending my support to them. However, after sitting on my pride for a bit, while it has been disheartening to see so much troll activity (although it's always been there, it seems more prevalent in the past year or two), even if it/they is/are a troll(s), the material posted may help other members.

The same thing happened to me! For better or for worse (mostly for worse) my BH and I have had our share of experiences with trolls.

Wait a sec. We’re one of those “couples.” Hmmm. Remember those Rodney Dangerfield beer commercials where he pulled off his mask? “I’m not even MrsWalloped!” *Gasp!* GoldenR?!! (sorry GoldenR )

Anyway, my troll radar is really poor and there are some nice people here who warn me privately about trolls, but I’ve spent time engaging with them and then when I found out they were trolls I felt so stupid and taken advantage of. But more than once I’ve received messages from people who read my posts to those trolls and they told me that my posts helped them. And that’s when I decided I didn’t care about trolls anymore. My posts might be directed at one poster but it’s for everybody to read. It helps me write it out and if it helps someone else understand a WW better or a WW understand herself better, then it’s totally worth it. Besides, I’d totally mess up if I were to try and guess who’s a troll and who’s not. With my luck I’d accuse a mod of being a troll.

Me: WW 47
My BH: Walloped 48
A: 3/15 - 8/15 (2 month EA, turned into 3 month PA)
DDay: 8/3/15
In R

posts: 769   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2018
id 8508707
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