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thatbpguy ( member #58540) posted at 8:00 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
A time will come when her fairytale will end. In the meantime she has lost the love & respect of her children (which will become more problematic for her as time goes by) as well as more fully realizing she was the betrayer and blew up your marriage. Her "fun" is just beginning.
ME: BH Her: WW DDay 1, R; DDay 2, R; DDay 3, I left; Divorced Remarried to a wonderful woman
"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S. Lewis
As a dog returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly...
Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 10:08 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
Evertrying ( member #60644) posted at 10:56 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
Your tag line states you live in North Carolina. Isn't that a state that you can sue the AP for alienation of affection????
I think I saw somewhere that a man sued his wife's AP and received a judgement and a BOAT LOAD of money!
BS - 55 on dday
WH - 48 on dday
Dday: 9/1/17
Status: Reconciled
thatbpguy ( member #58540) posted at 12:50 AM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
Your tag line states you live in North Carolina. Isn't that a state that you can sue the AP for alienation of affection????
I think I saw somewhere that a man sued his wife's AP and received a judgement and a BOAT LOAD of money!
Yes, NC is one such state. There have been a couple large cases. Both were overturned (ie, downsized) on appeal but in one case the $650,000 punitive damages was left in place. It's always worth a shot. But if you do, I would choose your attorney very carefully. Joe Schmoe, TV attorney who gets people millions for non injury accidents is not the right fella. Get one who understands the pit falls because the state (like most others) has been trying to rid itself of the law for this and I would think judges wouldn't shy away from a dismissal if it isn't filed just right.
ME: BH Her: WW DDay 1, R; DDay 2, R; DDay 3, I left; Divorced Remarried to a wonderful woman
"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S. Lewis
As a dog returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly...
Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 5:43 AM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
Was she served D today?
Buffer
Newlifeisgreat ( member #71308) posted at 5:52 AM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
Is today the first day of the new lease?
What is your lawyer telling you to do about it?
Hang in there! Believe or not, but you are doing very well.
Stay strong. I promise the light at the end of the tunnel is getting bigger and brighter. And no, it isn’t a freight train coming your way!
You got this
Betrayed Spouse. She cheated and I filed immediately upon discovering. She never even suspected that I knew until the moment she was served with reason being Adultery. Divorced: Sept, 2018. VERY happy with new life, 0 regrets
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 12:10 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
A time will come when her fairytale will end. In the meantime she has lost the love & respect of her children (which will become more problematic for her as time goes by) as well as more fully realizing she was the betrayer and blew up your marriage. Her "fun" is just beginning.
The problem is she will never see it this way as she is so narcissistic and is blame-shifting this my way because I was being a "jerk" to her by telling her to get her own things and not have everyone be her handmaid. WW will never see herself as the betrayer and everyone around her is being selfish. She is a sociopath and a gaslighter to the extreme. When she starts spewing this I have to laugh. Yes, her fun is about to begin because the train is about ready to run over her FBG ass.
Was she served D today?
Buffer
Spoke with the lawyer yesterday and he is trying to have the paperwork done today and filed. I've let him know that I need her out of the house, posthaste. Went ahead and sent him a copy of my lease for the next year overnight.
Your tag line states you live in North Carolina. Isn't that a state that you can sue the AP for alienation of affection????
I think I saw somewhere that a man sued his wife's AP and received a judgment and a BOATLOAD of money!
Yes, I'm from NC but usually, AoA is a long shot because it can be a gamble as the AP can declare bankruptcy and I would be out thousands of dollars. Or the settlement could be pennies on the dollar. If he interjects himself into this D like I think he will I'm going after him full bore to send a message.
Is today the first day of the new lease?
Yes, today is the first day of the new lease but WW will not budge her FBG ass because she thinks that it does not matter that I'm the only one on the lease along with the 2 other kids. That is why I sent the attorney the lease agreement so I can go about getting her out. She seems to think the separation starts when she decides to move out but in all actuality, it is when she is served. In other words, she is trying to say that she is married on paper and that is why she is not budging. She continues to shit on the marriage and uses it when she finds it convenient.
AP actually wanted to help WW move and she talked him out of it because he wanted to talk to me. Let WW know absolutely f#$king no and if I have to file a restraining order against him I will. She has actually alluded that he will do anything she asks, very scary
!!!
it isn’t a freight train coming your way!
That's coming for WW
!!
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
Sharkman ( member #56818) posted at 2:25 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
The problem is she will never see it this way as she is so narcissistic and is blame-shifting this my way because I was being a "jerk" to her by telling her to get her own things and not have everyone be her handmaid. WW will never see herself as the betrayer and everyone around her is being selfish. She is a sociopath and a gaslighter to the extreme. When she starts spewing this I have to laugh. Yes, her fun is about to begin because the train is about ready to run over her FBG ass.
You're right, it's a problem. The good news? It's no longer YOUR problem!
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 2:41 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
You're right, it's a problem. The good news? It's no longer YOUR problem!
Absolutely agree!! It took me the longest time to realize this and when I did it came as an epiphany. She is the one who is broken inside trying to find a nice love cocoon with AP at the expense of EVERYTHING!!!
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
thatbpguy ( member #58540) posted at 6:04 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
Yes, today is the first day of the new lease but WW will not budge her FBG ass because she thinks that it does not matter that I'm the only one on the lease along with the 2 other kids. That is why I sent the attorney the lease agreement so I can go about getting her out. She seems to think the separation starts when she decides to move out but in all actuality, it is when she is served. In other words, she is trying to say that she is married on paper and that is why she is not budging. She continues to shit on the marriage and uses it when she finds it convenient.
Have the apartment owner evict her.
ME: BH Her: WW DDay 1, R; DDay 2, R; DDay 3, I left; Divorced Remarried to a wonderful woman
"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S. Lewis
As a dog returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly...
Sharkman ( member #56818) posted at 6:51 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
She's not even looking for a love cocoon. She's a broken, horrible person who is using it as a rationalization exercise. People like her do not know what love is.
She's a broken monster. She abused the only man who ever loved her. Someday your hate will move to pity, and then one day you'll just think of her as someone that you used to know and need to interact with because of the kids. Kind of like a college friend who you didn't like too much, but still hung out with and now see on occassion at gatherings or parties or whatever.
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 7:18 PM on Wednesday, July 8th, 2020
Have the apartment owner evict her.
That will be my last resort. She is moving shit out on her own but want her to move faster. Hardcore NC as much as possible and 180 are in the works.
Can't stand the pain of having to look at her FBG ass every f#$king night.
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 12:07 PM on Thursday, July 9th, 2020
Thanks, Sharkman. Didn't look at it is as a rationalization exercise but it puts it into perspective. I've got no love for WW and it has turned to indifference rather quickly. Pretty sure the pity will come once I start putting her in the rearview. She gave me the out by dropping this into my lap and I was looking to get out of the relationship years ago but would have been taken to the cleaners in the ensuing D.
As for the draft separation agreement, my attorney has sent it to me and currently reviewing. Just a couple of changes that need to be made.
Moving forward a couple of steps at a time
.
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
Tempocontour ( member #65971) posted at 4:58 AM on Friday, July 10th, 2020
I've read this somewhere that a betrayed husband packed up all of the wayward wife's stuff in a few plastic garbage bag and placed them at the front door of her affair partner's house and (if your lawyer give you the ok) changed the house locks while ww was working. Or, if you have a garage, put all her packed up things in there.
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 11:55 AM on Friday, July 10th, 2020
WW has been moving her shit out of the house albeit very slowly. Attorney has advised as long as she is moving stuff out there is no need to pull out the big guns..............yet.
As for me, looked over the Separation Agreement yesterday from the attorney and everything looks good. Will be getting with him today to get her served.........finally. I'm going to try and have her served at work and since she works with the sheriff's/police department on a daily basis WW will not suspect anything.
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
Trapped74 ( member #49696) posted at 10:28 PM on Friday, July 10th, 2020
Did she get served today?
Many DDays. Me (BW) 49 Him (WH) 52 Happily detached and compartmentalized.
heartbrokeninNC (original poster member #72472) posted at 4:29 AM on Saturday, July 11th, 2020
Did she get served today?
Yes, she did get served today. Saved doing it at work and handed them to her tonight. Could not wait for the weekend to pass to do it Monday. WW was speechless and didn't think I was going to do it. She didn't like the car situation and the fact that I have requested sole custody of DD16. As for her 30 days notice she has still not put it in yet because in her words "I'm waiting on word back from the "interviews" that I did." The stark reality has finally knocked her upside the head and that she passed the point of no return months ago.
Outside she is being cool but inside I can tell she is screaming and crying like a little girl.
[This message edited by heartbrokeninNC at 10:36 PM, July 10th (Friday)]
M-20 T-21DDay: 12/24/2019Separated: 8/22/2020D: 10/11/2021
Me: 52
"Always fear regret more than failure." - Author Unknown
It's time for another name!
Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 8:16 AM on Saturday, July 11th, 2020
Strength now, she well charge at you when cornered.
One day at a time
Buffer
oldtruck ( member #62540) posted at 2:08 PM on Saturday, July 11th, 2020
do not be surprised if she resigns from her job on monday.
though this is why work place exposures must be done.
most likely OM and or WW would of been fired and you would
have brought about NC.
Newlifeisgreat ( member #71308) posted at 2:10 PM on Saturday, July 11th, 2020
Doesn’t it feel great now that you have done it???
Congratulations.
But just a word of caution. Now that she has realized her comfortable world is actually disappearing, prepare yourself for her to try something crazy. If you don’t have one, get a digital audio recorder and keep it on you at ALL TIMES, because you don’t know when she could pop out from around a corner.
In her mind, this is all your doing. Everything would be fine if you just accepted this one thing she wants. And on top of that, you are trying to take away her 16 year old baby!
Great job. Stay Strong, and protect yourself
Betrayed Spouse. She cheated and I filed immediately upon discovering. She never even suspected that I knew until the moment she was served with reason being Adultery. Divorced: Sept, 2018. VERY happy with new life, 0 regrets
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