SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

So many of you know my story. Dissolution day was October 16. My Ex WW told my youngest son a little over a year ago about the affair. Threw me under the bus to where he was very angry with me. I completely opened up with him with full honesty and transparency. He quickly apologized and in the following year had been able to visualize my pain, understand progress in my healing, and everything I’ve done to save the marriage while at the same time seeing his mother not put in the work, stay distant and leave me in pain. I now have the type of relationship with my son that I’d always wanted with my ex. We can and do talk about anything and everything with fluid ease. It is such a refreshing experience I can’t even describe it. In the aftermath, he initially lost respect for his mother as a person, then when he told her that both her and I together needed to tell our oldest son. She went and did it without me which upset my youngest son. That caused him to lose respect for her as a mother. He said she has never had an honest, deep conversation about why and how this all happened. She has never really checked in on him. She has never asked what she can do for him to help him through this. The other day he told her the mother he’s always known doesn’t exist anymore. The result of that was her texting me and thanking me for telling him whatever it was that caused him to feel this way. Are you fucking kidding me! I was a bit pissed to be honest, but I’m trying to become a better version of myself so I texted back that I have told both sons that she was always an incredible mother and they need to always remember that. Then I texted her that how our sons feel about her are between them and her. I haven’t said anything derogatory about her to create these feelings. They are both mid 20’s adults now and have the ability to decide for themselves how they feel and what they need from her. She’s still blaming me for her affair and the consequences of it.

The other day he told her the mother he’s always known doesn’t exist anymore. The result of that was her texting me and thanking me for telling him whatever it was that caused him to feel this way.

The truth.

More evidence to support that you made the right decision in leaving her, however hard that was.

It's hard that with kids, we will always be at least a little connected with our exes. There's no way to go fully no contact, which does seem to be the speediest way to healing. At least you have a good relationship with your younger son. Being able to talk freely sounds amazing. My kid is only 16, and she knows that we're divorcing but not why, and I do a lot of biting my tongue around her.

Are you at a point where you can block her? If you still need contact for a few business things, get those resolved and block her.

The cheater is the victim here. ROFLMAO!