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You are getting real goldfish. Unfortunately, the box Skan brought in somehow suffered from accidental flatulence induced death, and will be shipped postfartem. Yours are already in the mail.

Edit:

Also, please see....

No Refunds.

[This message edited by Notthevictem at 8:49 PM, August 11th (Friday)]

Sassylee, I want to state that I just work here. 😌

Sassy....What about a lungfish? Way cooler than a goldfish and they breathe air so in water isn't always necessary lol

An air breathing fish? Notthevictem! A fish like that would actually survive the shipping process.

You know how you were worried that the fish would surely be dead opon arrival at the donators house? A fish that can breathe air would solve this.

Shoot. Probably shouldn't have posted that live and in real time. I know the dead fish reward was to be kept secret. Oops

Can this fish smell?

Your farts ? - probably. Rocks can smell those I bet!

Testing on rocks now... will be back with results in a few minutes.

Hey folks...all this talk about killing sole and gold fish with methane is not funny.

It is cruel.

And unusual.

Methane inhibits the slivered almonds sticking onto the sole before frying....and everyone knows gold fish only accept the rolling of panko crumbs once doused in melted butter first! No...I repeat...NO methane is to be used.

Stop this talk immediately....before I report all of yous to the Canadian Ocean Wise Sustainable Fisheries.

Sheesh............

Canada is a real place?

Aghh!! Can you believe him kayaker55?

Tell him Canada is a real place. Won't you.

But try to do so in an ego kibble kind of way.

I know us Canadians can throw out some good ego kibbles. My wayward sure could. 😊

Rocks can't smell farts. I've tried 4 different kinds of fart 4 times each. Does nothing.

Stop this talk immediately....before I report all of yous to the Canadian Ocean Wise Sustainable Fisheries.

Those motherfuckers don't have jurisdiction in Arizona. Neither do the fish they represent.

Thug life.

thanks for having my back there hopeless. It totally escaped me... was busy farting on rocks (thanks Sassy for a meaningless waste of 15 mins I will never get back)... but yeah. goldfish don't live in oceans.

(((Hopeless))) send us an ego kibble won't you?

I know notthevictem doesn't believe that Arizona is a real state but I do.

Nope, I know all about "Arizona". It's legal name is 'Lesser Nevada'.

Oooooo! Hopeless. Did you hear that my thug friend?

Google "Florida Man" for my response. The amount of inbreeding that goes on in that state is astonishing.

Tell him Canada is a real place. Won't you.

But try to do so in an ego kibble kind of way.

I know us Canadians can throw out some good ego kibbles

NTV would make a great Time Hortons employee...Lol. Coffee only though. No farts.

Tried to post a pic of a Lungfish but it won't work. Blah!

Owell. I'll take the goldfish crackers. The pizza flavoured ones.

Yeeessss. Now send us an ego kibble like, 'oh you florida man. How amazing you are even though you are the product of inbreeding. I think you are amazing and deserve so much better then a wife who holds your first cousin parentage against you.

goldfish crackers

Sorry thatbpguy ate em all. I've got shredded shoestrings left that I forgot to include in the package mailed off to refuz2bavictim.