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trustedg ( member #44465) posted at 11:07 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
Found his burner account. I can’t believe this.
UGH, I am so sorry you are going through this. You have done great so far, stay strong.
Me BWHim WH DDay 12/2012Married a long time, in R
Robert22205https ( member #65547) posted at 11:09 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
Found his burner account. I can’t believe this.
Ouch! I'm so sorry to hear about the burner phone.
Do not give him the phone.
[This message edited by Robert22205https at 5:39 PM, March 19th (Tuesday)]
Edie ( member #26133) posted at 11:09 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
(((Ladybug)))
Ugh. But well done finding it.
inthedark99 ( member #66168) posted at 11:24 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
oh geez lbm, am sorry you found that.
was it from before or is it still ongoing with the ap?
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:25 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
Will this set you back from some of your healing?
How can we help you??
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 11:27 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
I'm so sorry, LBM. Is there anything new on it or is everything from pre-DDay? Or, can you tell?
Whatever. Finding it, a secret way of communicating, is trauma. If there's anything new, more trauma.
What can I say? I'm so sorry you got stabbed again.
BH(me)72(now); XWW 64; M 42 yrsDDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW 4 years; "dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, liesSeparated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020
Ladybugmaam (original poster member #69881) posted at 11:43 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
It was activated two days after d day. He said he got it to say goodbye and then threw it in a pond next to our house. Daily, he’s told me they’ve have no contact since d day. What I found was a TracPhonr card, not the phone itself. He says it’s gone. I don’t believe him. Told him to start swimming. I
He said he called her that one time at work. Just as I had blocked and unfollowed obs, just messaged him with the info. Stupid
EA DD 11/2018
PA DD 2/25/19
One teen son
I am a phoenix.
Cooley2here ( member #62939) posted at 11:55 PM on Tuesday, March 19th, 2019
Well,shit! I was hoping he was the one in a million who isn’t a bastard. It pays to pay attention to the posters. They have written the Cheater’s Manual and know how this works.
When things go wrong, don’t go with them. Elvis
childofcheater ( member #33887) posted at 12:00 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
Me: 42 yo, him 41Married 19 years together 233 kids: DD15, DD12, DS9DDay 2/9/12 found suspicious text to coworkerStatus: in R, work in progress
HellFire ( member #59305) posted at 12:00 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
So you found it. He didnt tell you about it. And he has been swearing this,and that since dday. All the while,lying his ass off.
Polygraph.
But you are what you did
And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive
The smallest man who ever lived..
Ginny ( member #43196) posted at 12:01 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
Polygraph time. He should be happy to do it if what he just told you is the truth. Make sure he follows through with it. No way we would have reconciled without one.
My fwh contacted the OW after dday. It hurt me more than the affair. He knew how bad I was hurting yet he saw her one more time (supposedly to see what her mental status was like, and whether she was going to blow up his world). We almost didn’t survive it. Five years later, when I get pissed off occasionally, THAT is what I get pissed off about. He KNEW how much he had hurt me but had to contact her anyway.
I am so sorry.
One more thing, he bought a Trac phone for ONE phone call? I call BS.
[This message edited by Ginny at 12:49 AM, March 20th (Wednesday)]
BW49
FWH50
DDay 11-02-13
Married 30 years
2 month PA/EA with COW
DS28
Trying to R
HellFire ( member #59305) posted at 12:02 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
Keep the lines of communication open with OBS.
All of those long walks his wife went on,after dday,reeked of her having a burner phone.
And their synchronized NC messages?
That phone isnt in the pond. Or,it wasnt until you confronted him with the phone card.
[This message edited by HellFire at 6:05 PM, March 19th (Tuesday)]
But you are what you did
And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive
The smallest man who ever lived..
Ginny ( member #43196) posted at 12:04 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
I am so pissed off FOR you! 
BW49
FWH50
DDay 11-02-13
Married 30 years
2 month PA/EA with COW
DS28
Trying to R
Robert22205https ( member #65547) posted at 12:05 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
I guess he didn't learn anything from all the books he's read. He should have told you!
How many minutes was the card for? I think the minimum is 60 minutes.
Was a burner phone his only option to say goodbye? No access to a land line?
Was the phone chat before or after the NC letter?
How do you know if the phone in the pond or at his office? He has the burden of proof.
Did they say goodbye (30 seconds) or conspire to resume the affair after things cool down? Again, he has the burden of proof.
[This message edited by Robert22205https at 6:27 PM, March 19th (Tuesday)]
Sanibelredfish ( member #56748) posted at 12:41 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
Even though he knew what he stood to lose?!? If you decide to D, I hope you take his ass to the cleaners. What a prick!
Buster123 ( member #65551) posted at 12:42 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
BURNER PHONE !!! Major flag, there's no way he bought one just for one phone call, he could simply borrow someone else's phone for that. Tell OBS, I would be surprised if the OW has another one, hence her long walks with the dog.
Justgettingbye ( member #69429) posted at 12:44 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
paboy ( member #59482) posted at 12:44 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
oh wow.. its these deceptions that eventually kill your heart.
What are you going to do? He must realize now that he may have pushed you over the edge
If you havent done so already, let him see that your ducks are in a row. Seen or seeing a lawyer. Divorce papers being processed. The 180. WH in the spare bedroom.
Very serious conversation time...
[This message edited by paboy at 7:24 PM, March 19th (Tuesday)]
Sharkman ( member #56818) posted at 1:24 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
That explains her long dog walks
GotTheTshirtToo ( member #51377) posted at 1:35 AM on Wednesday, March 20th, 2019
BS ONLY
[This message edited by SI Staff at 7:36 PM, May 26th (Sunday)]
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