SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Well here’s the update everyone has been waiting for.

And the verdict issssss

It was thrown out.

Sooo here’s the story, I’m so ecstatic I have to tell it.

Judge was an asshole, we were in a room with about 40 people in it, he didn’t want to hear back stories or anything. I was nervous bc I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to tell my side of the story.

She didn’t bring a lawyer, I did. The judge first reads our file, he asks if I was ever arrested or the police called during what she claims happened, she said no. He asked if a restraining order was filed against me when we were in the process or after we were divorced. Luckily I had my copy of when she filed for divorce and the paperwork when it was finalized. There was no restraining order, even though she tried to say theee was then quickly changed to well I filed for one last Thursday.

He then asked her if at any point I pointed the gun at her, she said no. I for sure though she was going to lie here. Bc there would be no way to prove I didn’t, it was just me and her there that night. She said he pointed in directly at himself and said he was going to shoot hinself. The judge responded with “unfortunately he has the right to shoot himself if he so desires”. She then said, he must be stalking me bc he knew I moved into a new apartment with my boyfriend. Judge asked me how I knew this, I said her mom came to me at work and talked to me about the entire situation, that I didn’t know for sure until then, and that I still wasn’t 100% sure until I was

Served with the TPO and her address wasn’t the same as ours. Miss “ex wife’s last name” I’m going to have to dismiss this order. Was the sweetest sound throughout this entire process.

FINALLY she didn’t get what she wanted. She looked so embarrassed and looked like she was about to cry, she couldn’t get out of that room fast enough looking like a fool in front of all those people.

Then it hit me, she was about to cry and she was so embarrassed bc she wanted so bad to screw my life up. I actually married and was in love with this woman.

Finally can move on to bigger and better things. It’s finally all behind me, hopefully.

That was it, I didn’t have to give my side besides

We've all been waiting to hear this! Thanks for the update. I was quite confident it would be thrown out 90% of the battle is just showing up. Congratulations.

Big congrats, Bulldawg. The judge has probably dismissed many of these. He asked the relevant questions that got to the meat of the matter and your XW failed the test, possibly like many others before your case that have abused this process. I'm not a judge but if I were one I would imagine having to deal with people like your XW and their trumped up RO's in my court would probably make me a real asshole as well.

Now, if you do manage to still get into the AF, do consider Okinawa (Kadena AB) to be one of your requested duty stations. Almost everyone who has spent time there loved it. The locals and the culture are very laid back and friendly. It is Japan's version of Hawaii. You will definitely feel like you are far away from your past shit-uations.

It was thrown out.

YAY! Congrats, Bulldawg!

Then it hit me, she was about to cry and she was so embarrassed bc she wanted so bad to screw my life up. I actually married and was in love with this woman.

Isn't it amazing how their true colours shine through after you stop putting up with their BS.

Congrats!

I for one think one reason it was thrown out was not because you had the truth on your side, but because you lawyered up. I personally don’t have much faith in “the truth will set you free” when it comes to the court system. But I’m glad it prevailed in your case.

[This message edited by shakentocore at 11:29 AM, June 14th (Thursday)]

Having that lawyer definitely helped.

Turns out she had one of her coworkers stalking my Facebook and taking screenshots of my posting her affair on Facebook and trying to claim that as harassment.

I was thinking of calling her district manager to tell her about all of this, but I’m not doing that. It would just be used against me at a later time, especially if she lost her job.

And yes, it hit me like a truck when I realized that this woman was so upset that she couldn’t destroy my life. 4/5 months ago we were married and looking to buy a house. Hell we would get into tickle fights.

I had no idea what the future had. But I’m SO happy this happened. Maybe, just maybe this is the first step for her in correcting her issues. But I won’t hold my breath. There is no more hope coming from me towards her.

It was bittersweet too, bc I still love her, I still care about her, I know she’s going to regret this all one day once her fairytale blows up.

But she did it all to herself, she showed me who she really is. It really does make me sad to see what all she has become and is willing to do just out o spite.

The judge responded with “unfortunately he has the right to shoot himself if he so desires”.

Sorry, but

She got what she deserved. Now you go live YOUR life and don't look back.

You've got this.

((((Bulldawg))))

Excellent update! Congrats!

Now put her and those chapters of your life in your rearview mirror and look forward. No contact. No social media about any of it. Nothing. Your fabulous new life is in front of you. Live it to its fullest!

Well done, Bulldawg!

Sounds like you were over-prepared, which is awesome!

I'm thrilled for you! That was such a bullshit farce!

Congratulations on getting it dismissed! I'm sorry that you had to go through it, but very happy that the good guy won!

Congratulations Bulldawg!

I was over prepared. I spent a good two hours on the phone with my lawyer last night. He made sure I had phone records, text records, the copy of my divorce summons, the copy of the divorce being final, the copy of when I removed my name from the lease. Also had a copy of my criminal record so I couldn’t be falsely charged. In the 6 years we were together, no domestic violence, bc he was sure she would try to pin that on me.

We had it all planned out, her grand slam attempt was “well he knew I moved out of our apartment and knew I was living with my current boyfriend (the guy she cheated on me with). So he must be stalking me”. The judge asked me how I knew of this, and I told him the truth, her own mother told me bc of how ashamed she was that her daughter did all this. She came up to me at work, and at first we didn’t even talk about my ex wife, it just got brought up in conversation. That’s how I found out.

So now she knew my source from that, I imagine that hurt her feelings.

Moral of the story, don’t be a lying piece of shit cheater, try to play the victim card, and you won’t get embarrassed in court.

And I haven’t made a social media post about this, I was advised not too since it was very obvious she had a spy on my Facebook the entire time. BUT one of the few friends she didn’t delete sent me a screenshot of her saying “it’s unfortunate that someone can get away with stalking and abuse and not be punished for it. God will look out for me and I’m happy with how everything turned out and who I’m currently with now. I wasn’t the first woman to get divorced, so I don’t see why my name is slandered and no one is punished”

It was the classic “I just got my ass handed to me in court, but I’m still right and he’s still wrong” excuse.

Me and my dad had a nice little chuckle about that.

Idk how someone can literally have every single sign that they were wrong, and still try to act like they are right.

Yoda would say

The delusion is strong with this one

Congratulations.

Did you ever talk with your recruiter?

Do you have any idea of whether this will hurt your efforts to enter the military?

I certainly hope it will not, but in case it does, I hope you will not let it get you down.

It seems your future holds many possibilities now that you have all this behind you.

Also, I feel like I want to say one more thing.

You stated a couple of times that if she hadn't cheated, you would still be happily married.

I would offer the opinion that you were under the impression that you were happily married.

I only say this because when we lose something, if we hold on to the idea that it was something wonderful, it hurts so much worse.

But if we see it for the negative thing it actually was, then letting go is freeing.

Good luck to you.

Well I mean I guess you are right.

In my eyes though, I didn’t see anything going on. I guess if she was the woman I thought she was, we would still be happily married.

Unfortunately she’s a lying, scheming, vindictive cheater.

So I guess no matter how I look at it now, we could never be happily married.

YAYY!!! Glad it worked out in your favor! Onward, Bulldawg, onward!

Please don't forget to talk to your recruiter.

Even though it was dismissed, the fact that one was filed at all may still come up in a criminal background check for the Armed Forces.

You need to find out if and what needs disclosed. If you leave it off and it pops up, you could be dishonorably discharged for falsifying your application.

I want to really stress this because I have a very old drug possession charge that was dismissed. It was a conditional discharge, meaning once I got through my probation successfully, I no longer have a criminal record. If the question is "have you ever been convicted" I can legally answer "no." However, due to the nature of my career (RN), it still comes up on background checks and I was questioned the one time I did say no. It worked out fine because I have the law on my side, but I have always disclosed it because of that happening one time.

I don't see any reason at all why this would hinder you in any way, as long as you are upfront with it.

Bulldawg:

Look at what your exWW has said and done here. She brought a totally bogus legal action to destroy your reputation because you simply exposed her cheating and no one believes her BS story. Then after she had her butt handed to her in court she posts that the court wronged her by allowing her to be smeared for just being a poor little divorced woman.

She has no remorse for cheating on you.

She has no shame or guilt for how she treated you.

She has no integrity or honor.

She was willing to bring a bogus legal action against you because you exposed the truth of her cheating.

Every word she speaks screams entitled, selfish, and spoiled.

Please celebrate not only your court decision today but the fact that you are not condemned to a lifetime of misery with this woman.

You are headed down a bright road Bulldawg. Your exWW was just a speed bump in your journey not a lifelong roadblock to happiness. Yay!😎

[This message edited by fareast at 9:03 PM, June 14th (Thursday)]

Brilliant news Bulldawg!

Glad to hear that you and your dad were able to have a little giggle about it together.

Now, step away from her Facebook.

Good luck with your forces application.

Strength and peace to you.

MOB

No doubt.

As long as this is the last thing she tries, this is totally behind me. I’ve got a feeling that it won’t be, like I told my father she is pretty petty. It must be making her sick to her stomach that eventually her lies have caught up to her.

Idk though, nor do I care anymore. If this is the last chapter of our story, which I hope that it is, I can finally move on.

I no longer have a 5foot nothing psycho dragging me down.

Yesterday morning felt SO good. And it still feels good today.