SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Good Luck BW! I so hope it turns out negative. And you get the chance at doing a happy dance in front of her.

I keep seeing all the shows like Maury Povich and Jerry Springer where the woman is willing to come a show, insisting that the man is the father of her child, only to find out in front of everyone that He's NOT!! I so hope we have that kind of shining moment ourselves. Nothing would make me happier than to be able to share with all of you one of two things: either 1) She LIED and was never pregnant or 2) She was pg but it's not my H's!!! Ah, that would be so heavenly.

I second that motion. My H is supposed to take the DNA test with his daughter next week. I have seen the same Maury shows and I hope to hell that it comes back that she isn't my H's daughter.

[This message edited by scooter3377 at 3:16 PM, August 3rd (Thursday)]

To all the ladies waiting for DNA results I can only say expect the absolute worst and be overjoyed if the results are negative.

Don't fill yourself with false hopes because the letdown will be twice as hard. Trust me, I know all too well.

Good luck to all of you,

Me

M&M3...our (me and H) motto is hope for the best but prepare for the worst. I guess time will tell.

One thing my H did was ask that the test results be sent to our atty. They will not be mailed to the house. I wasn't sure how I felt about that. Now I think I'm OK w/ it. If it is his, than that piece of paper will never enter our house. I guess that's just me in protection mode. We're trying to keep the whole mess separate from our lives together and treat it like a business transaction. If the paperwork stays w/ the atty then it's just one more step removed.

Funny that the OW w/ OC aren't considered prostitutes...they have sex w/ men and 9 months later demand money. Pathetic in my opinion...

Hey guys! There was a post on page 31 from a new member that I think might have gotten overlooked. From TryingNot2Cry. Welcome tn2c!!

divinelioness,

I PMed her and invited her to reciprocate. She has only posted that one time according to her profile.

I'm away again until Sunday night, but suggested she post here again.

"Funny that the OW w/ OC aren't considered prostitutes...they have sex w/ men and 9 months later demand money. Pathetic in my opinion... "

My theory is ** They are one and the same except the prostitute gets paid up front. When a woman (in our situation) lets a guy know almost a year and a half later that she had a kid it ain't because she's seeking out a daddy relationship for her child. It's all about the money.

Me

TryingNot2Cry-

I am in a similar situation. The OW baby is due this month. I pray the best for both of us.

I PMd her and invited her back as well.

.OW came up with a new twist to the same old plot....a Modern "conception"...if he would just "gift sperm" to her at a sperm bank..no one would ever KNOW about his involvement, the law protected him...and she would let him go ..She didn't want to end up alone... "would he help her?", no strings attached....But there was the implied threat to expose the whole story of the A to the wife, if He didn't "cooperate"...Otherwise Known As extortion, blackmail and coersion.

laugh

[This message edited by lunnychick at 4:22 PM, January 25th (Thursday)]

lunny,

How did your children take the news that dad was unfaithful and possibly the father of a 1/2 brother?

I would think since she's still married that in the eyes of the law, her H is the "father". I can certainly understand you wanting to get rid of any sperm at the bank.

Have you seen a lawyer? Do you have any recourse such as a restraining order or lawsuit for slander?

BW

as well as could be expected...they were 14 and 16..when told 5 years ago..because of the "800lb gorilla in the room" it was their right to know that they were not to blame for the anxiety created by their father's actions....I thought I was divorcing him....I felt honesty and openness and compassion were the orders for the day. I loved their father , but he had to pay the consequences for his actions.

Legally it is a nightmare about who is the father...because the psycho Mom won't resolve issues...she is okay with just getting away with the "illusuions" she has created.

..This poor child has never met either father... I fear HE is the object of her obsessions now , her "lover boy"...she, the OW can say my husband's name forever now when she looks into her son's eyes and never forget about their "love"....but the child gets no father until the evil "bitch wife" gets out of the way..She is so sick ! I am powerless to save that child from her clutches!

I can't wait for the Karma bus to flatten her fantasies...that is why I have handed over this mess to GOD.

I've done all I can do to affect the outcome.

[This message edited by lunnychick at 5:48 PM, January 25th (Thursday)]

lOONY WHY is she not charged with fraud?

She illegally put your husband's name on her child's BC. That is illegal in any state if you can prove she was married to another man and not your husband= which you can.

If she lied about your husband's donation at the bank. It is illegal to falsify those documents and forge info.

Is she still here in the us? Did she get citizenship based on the lie of being you, the wife of your Husband? I see so many ways for you to report her and make her pay legally.

didn't your lawyer tell you your rights and what can be brought against her?

I agree with Phoebe. There are WAY too many over the top allegations here to not be able to successfully prosecute.

My H goes for the DNA test tomorrow and his alleged daughter goes on Thursday. WE should know the results sometime next week. so why am i stressing about htings already? i am already depressed about the test and the results. i can't stop thinking baout it. i think next week, if the results are not negative, I may have to leave my H for a couple of days. I just don't know that I will be able to handle being around him while i figure things out for myself. i have not told him that yet though.

anyone feel the same way about finding out their results?

i did tell him that we will have to sit down and have a serious talk about what kind of father he wants to be- how involved- and how we can make that happen without paying her a bunch more money and if we need to consult a different lawyer on the subject to get a second opinion about our options since this woman is illegal.

scooter3377-

I am not sure how I will react if the OC is my H also. I know he will support the OC financially and he will probably want to be the same kind of father he is to his other children. I agree with you about taking a break to clear your head.

Best of luck with the test results. I will be thinking of you.

scooter,

I think a break from your H to help clear your head is always a good idea, as long as you explain it that way to him. Being around H and the situation is an inescapable trigger for many of us.

I think you'll feel better after the results are known regardless of the outcome. Think of it as having a tooth pulled...it hurts but will feel better later. Even if the results are positive you will at least know what you are dealing with and how you want to proceed.

My cousin once told me I have an "intolerance for uncertainty". I bet that could apply to a lot of us here; it is just SO hard second guessing the OW's motives, where our H's thoughts are, etc. In my case, I am through the worst of it now (never having had to second guess my H's thoughts, etc., as he had made his choice YEARS ago to protect me from the OW/OC in the best way he saw fit and to have NC except for CS).

My presence here in SI is now more to console others and help whenever, or if, I can. I also sincerely hope that others can find their way to where I am now: happy, secure and finally letting go of the anger/hurt. Of course, my situation is quite different from most of you here (the old 18 year "time-warp" scenario), but the hurt/anger part is the same nonetheless.

Take care

Phoebe...as what she did was technically criminal code violations...the DA would not prosecute her.."a waste of tax payer funds",(who dares to touch or condemn a "MOTHER"?)..it was not important enough to enforce Ca. laws !javascript:AddSmily(' ')

Ca. , ...who knows what could happen ?...The lawyers said it is better to wait and let her bring the civil suit 1st for CS and to determine patenity, otherwise he is not legally liable for anything, ...technically, her Ex husband is the assumed father even though my husband's name is on her child's Birth certificate...and then we can bring up these false misrepresentations, illegal actions and her unwillingness to resolve legal issues. ....She just proves herself to be the Bigger liar , and psychopath in determining the future legal outcome...So far 5 1/2 years later..she has not proven anything...but still she goes around implying things that are not legally true... if something happened to my husband...because no one in the Gov't buracracy would ask questions...they would just assume her BC to be valid and issue benefits under SS. Big time fraud!

It is a legal quagmire and of course my husband is not going to place himself in legal jeapordy, just to appease my anger at this woman's unbelievable actions... We have to face united this crazy psycho bitch ..who doesn't care who gets hurt or whose reputations are ruined or who gets scars for life ..ie her child, emotionally...it is only about her and her revenge ! Otherwise I am covering my "assets" like crazy...and I have to do this estate protection stuff for the next 13 years or until hubby dies ?

I am so lucky to stay married ?

[This message edited by lunnychick at 5:50 PM, January 25th (Thursday)]

one other thing, as I am caught up in this legal nightmare...waiting for the perverbial "Other shoe to drop"

I have no rights in this mess according to these lawyers...this things have been only done to my husband...and if I tried to prove I was damaged..it would take a lot of legal fees and I might not win !

As the elimination of heart balm statutes my have dealt a blow to my claim that my interests too have been damaged ! Feminists have done so much damage...they invite interlopers into a marriage..I quess because all should be fair "in love or WAR ?" What a World!

Hi,

I have not been posting much, but reading. Sorry to see so many on here going through similar situations.

I wanted to share with you all something that is almost laughable, if it were not so frustrating and pathetic. My H's CS case is going to a full court hearing because OW thinks my H hides enormous amounts of income (yeah, right!) and that she and OC are entitled to the same luxurious lifestyle that we live. To get real, I live in a small house on a tiny piece of property, my kids go to public school and wear clothes from Target, and I drive a Chrysler. Nice life we have, but far from luxury.

Anyways, OW claims she needs $6,000 per month in CS! We get her "budget" from her attny in the next few days--it will be interesting to find out what on earth she needs the money for.

I feel so victimized by this whole thing...someone recently mentioned prostitution. Boy do you have it right, except that it is legal!

Please say a prayer for us, as my H's case is winding up. Both H and I feel that in the end we will prevail with something fair, but to get through it is a challenge.