SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Didn't really look at pictuers or spend too much time. But I was kinda curiuos as to who his friends still are and if we have more mutual friends. I ran into him once due to a mutual friend. I wanted to see if we had more mutual friends. Also, I was just very curious. Its bee over 1.5 years, so I figure let me take a lil peek. I'm doing ok though. I think I'm finally starting to be over it. I didn't really obsess about it more or feel the need to heavily analyze his myspace page. I never looked at his picture or comments. Mostly just did it to see his friends. Wanted to see what kind of company he keeps these days. Mostly also to see if I have more friends with him, which I did, and that made me very happy. Because I feel that that means I have progressed socially, where as he may not have. I know, that Myspace doesn't necessarily prove anything about someones actual social life. But, hey, it made me feel better.

Okay, even peeking is a big no-no. Peeking will turn into a little message, which will turn in to a e-mail,and so on. Well, you get where I'm going here.

Why are you so curious? What difference does it make if you's have mutual friends. You know where your heading don't you? It always starts out with being a little curious.

Your treading on thin ice here. After 1.5 yrs. The curiousity should be long gone.

Well so much for 1.5 years of NC.

Time to start a new NC clock or you will be getting closer to disaster than you can imagine.

Yesterday you said you missed him and today you looked up his Myspace.

What choice will you make tomorrow?

You broke the mental NC.

You are stuck in the obsessive mode.

Focus on your M and your H.

Never said I missed him yesterday. Wanted to be put in a bad situation again (not with him) just so I can make the right decision this time. I feel that its okay that I looked, because now I'm pretty confident I'm over it. I kinda did it to see if I would still have a rush of emotions. But I didn't, and not feeling that rush made me feel great! It made me feel like I was back in control again. I have no inkling to peek again. In fact, I feel like I've moved on way more than him. So I'm good.

Skurd,

Never said I missed him yesterday.

you did say you miss the xOM at the beginning of your post.

I'm doing okay I suppose, but the reality is, I still really miss xOM.

[This message edited by beach at 7:47 PM, November 15th (Sunday)]

I knew this would happen- it was like sitting at the railroad crossing watching someone trying to make the falling gate.

Stop justifying what you're doing by making excuses. It's pathetic and you know it. Oh, it made you "feel great." Well lah-dee-freaking-dah! You miss the drug, you wanted a hit, and so you rationalize that you're not REALLY making contact by checking his myspace page. You can't bullshit us, Skurd, because we've been liars and cheaters just like you.

Even though you did not send him a message, it's the same thing as breaking NC. What's really sad is that you're somehow twisting this really wrong thing into something palatable... except we know shit when we see it. We own ours.

Skurd;

IMHO, the following phrases fall in the "I'm just a little pregnant" category.

Didn't really look at pictures or spend too much time. ... but I did do some peaking and reading, but just a bit, not much, just a half hour, well, okay, it was more like two but who’s counting?

I didn't really obsess about it more ... but I did obsess just a bit yesterday and perhaps a bit tomorrow, but that’s not real obsession, that’s a baby obsession so it doesn’t really count.

Fallen - Stop justifying what you're doing by making excuses. It's pathetic and you know it. Oh, it made you "feel great." Well lah-dee-freaking-dah! You miss the drug, you wanted a hit, and so you rationalize that you're not REALLY making contact by checking his myspace page. You can't bullshit us, Skurd, because we've been liars and cheaters just like you.[/italic