SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Just stumbled across this thread. Does my self-esteem good to hear what idiots other men can be. Reminds me that, all things considered, I like my odds in the dating world.

My strangest online encounter was almost a year ago. I'd just started testing the waters again after a year of separation (and NC). So one night I'm checking out recent visitors to my profile and see a woman whose photo didn't show her face, but was cropped from shoulder to mid-thigh to show off her tight red dress. Her profile, though it wasn't disturbingly explicit, made clear that she was basically trolling for sex (and a rather particular kind of sex, too).

Given that she wasn't unattractive -- and that I'm a guy -- I continued reading. Wasn't long, though, until something seemed out of joint. She was also a half-time single parent, she liked going out dancing and her favorite movies struck an oddly familiar chord. By the time I'd checked her age, height and languages spoken (where she'd listed fluency in "Other" in an obvious effort to disguise herself), I realized I knew her.

She was, of course, my then STBWxW. This little stunt earned her the nickname Slime Mold.

I was somewhat unthrilled by this discovery, which I still consider a passive-aggressive attempt to provoke me into... well, what, exactly, I don't know. Into breaking NC is my best guess. But fortunately I never gave SM the satisfaction, and since I was in stealth mode at the time, she never even saw that I'd visited her profile. I hope it's a big fucking mystery to her to this very day.

For me, it's now just a great story that keeps me competitive when it's time to tell weirdest-dating-experience tales online

Last month, I went on a date to the art museum with a guy that was a little too into his dog.

At almost every picture, he'd have to stop and make a comment about whether or not his dog would like the painting.

Sample quotes (with a fake dog name for anonymity):

"I could never have that picture in my house. It would give Sandy nightmares."

"Sandy would really love to see that picture. Purple is her favorite color."

"It's too bad Sandy couldn't be here with us today; she'd love to see the paintings in this gallery, but she might try to bite that sculpture!"

It was very odd. It wasn't just one or two comments, but almost every time we stopped and looked at something! Then he started going off on how public transportation doesn't allow dogs, and a few other dog-related rants.

I am a major animal-lover, but this guy was just weird. I have a female friend who is a little too into her dog, and I wish I could have set them up, but she's 25 years older than him.

"Purple is her favorite color."

Wut???

Dogs are colorblind, correct?

Found this online and laughed so much! This is not my story btw.

"I became concerned midway through the beers at Taco Mac that whereas I was hating this guy a little more with every passing second, he was looking at me and licking his lips like a starving man hallucinating the image of me turning into a bucket of fried chicken. I knew we were going to have an expectations problem on our hands later, because no way in hell was I hooking up with Dwayne by that point. I grew ever more nervous as he leered a bit more obviously with every beer."

Met a guy for a drink...One drink each.he told me he was a modern man and believed the bill should be split in half. The total bill was 9.54. I asked him if he really wanted my five dollars? His reply was only if I really wanted to. I told him ,no I paid for gas to meet him in his neighborhood.

As he got into his Merecedes suv he asked if I wanted to come over to his house for a nightcap.Told him it was late and I had to go....ummm it was 730 lol

I got to go on a date with the Cheesey Nut Man--nuff said!

My favourite SI dating story thus far.

And how did I miss this thread the first two times it went around?? This one deserves a permanent spot at the top of NB. Then all the newbies who wonder if it's too soon to date might have a few reasons not to.

[This message edited by Griefstricken25 at 10:35 PM, September 13th (Thursday)]

I swear I love this thread.

New guy in the office started this past Monday. Being that it is a small office, I am trying to be friendly and get him acquainted. Turns out that we know two people in common one being my current SO!! Second one being SO's manager. SO and his manager both work at another company. Well he takes my friendliness a different way I guess.

him: "Hey, can I take you to lunch tomorrow?"

me: "no I don't think so"

him: "but I'll use my corporate card and expense it...free lunch!!!"

me: "why not use it on your wife and twin daughters then?"

WHAT IS WRONG WITH MEN!!

Omg I love this thread!

phmh: is the anonymity for your date or the dog?

Note to self: do not bring my nuts on first date covered in cheese and no chin sucking!

phmh: is the anonymity for your date or the dog?

Ha ha! I'm always worried that people might recognize themselves when I write such things and I don't want to hurt any feelings.

My dogs would love this post if they could read...

I got to go on a date with the Cheesey Nut Man--nuff said!

My scars are pretty deep and will remind me of my ordeal for a long time, but they have healed over and are no longer a threat to my existence.

Sad in AZ: When I read this post I didn't realize the second part was your tagline... Thought that Cheesy Nut Man was the one who had scarred you for life! Or maybe he did???

[This message edited by HappilyUnMarried at 7:02 PM, September 15th (Saturday)]

No scars from the Cheesy Nut Man! But I did decide to give up internet dating-for good!

I'm sure folks have heard this before, but here goes..

1st date with someone I met online after splitting up with XWH (yes, too soon)..We emailed back and forth for a week before agreeing to meet in a local restaurant/bar. My photos were all within six months and included a full length pic (I am a curvy girl). He was very concerned at how recent my pics were. He sent me more pics than were on his profile; he was good looking, average in size. So we meet...and he is a good 100 lbs heavier than the pictures he claimed were from the previous year!! (I don't mind heavy guys, but for pete's sake, be HONEST). Besides all that, he claimed that his wife changed all the locks while he was "away on business". Eventually he sort of said she accused him of cheating, to which he swore that he never did "though he had plenty of opportunity". Next!

Well, unfortunately, the next guy, also an online person..we met on Halloween at a bar (I only drank soda). It was a really nice conversation, and I thought he was adorable. But then his idea for a second date was to come over to my house after my kids went to school, and for me to "make him breakfast". Ug. No. Next!

The worst one EVER, though, was through the newspaper personals (I didn't have a computer back then). We went on one date, and he seemed nice, and we made plans for a second, but due to phone conversations in between, I realized I really didn't want to date him. He was really hung up on his ex-wife - she was all he talked about. So we met on the beach for our second date, and I told him that while I enjoyed our time together, I just didn't feel we were right for each other. He actually took it well (I don't think he was all that into me, either). We even had dinner after the beach, and I went home (it was in my town, but he didn't know where I lived, and I walked through streets/abandoned lots just in case he tried to follow me.

The next day, after I got home from a baseball game with friends, there was a message from a detective on my answering machine. Turned out, after my date left me, he went straight to his ex-wife's house, and proceeded to beat her up. He even called the police and reported that she'd fallen down stairs. The hospital determined her injuries were not consistent with a fall, the police were called back. When they went to his apartment to talk to him, they discovered he'd stabbed himself ... to death.

Detectives came to my house and I had to tell them how his demeanor had been at dinner the previous night. It was very surreal. Scared the crap out of me.

Redvixen.....WHOA!!!

The next day, after I got home from a baseball game with friends, there was a message from a detective on my answering machine. Turned out, after my date left me, he went straight to his ex-wife's house, and proceeded to beat her up. He even called the police and reported that she'd fallen down stairs. The hospital determined her injuries were not consistent with a fall, the police were called back. When they went to his apartment to talk to him, they discovered he'd stabbed himself ... to death.

Holy crap!!

Redvixen, omg, I think I would take a looooong hiatus from dating after that happened! yikes!

Red Vixen wins.

I was out with a man who started choking on a bite of hot dog. I'm embarrassed to admit that for a few seconds I was in a state of shock about it. (I'm a nurse and should have sprung into action!) About the time I got my bearings, and started to get up to go over to him and do the HM, he started coughing and then gagging, and he vomited onto the table.

Hurtinky: wow...how's that for first impressions, lol?!

Redvixen: WOW!! That is very surreal!! I'd be very hesitant about dating online or through personal ads ever again after that!! Hell, I'll be thinking about that when I start OLD myself!! You win, hands down!!

Damn, redvixen.