SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

GonnaGetThru-I absolutely agree 100% about Facebook and my real friends. Unfortunately, one of the "friends" that is letting me know is well known for liking to stir the pot and keep the drama going. There is no doubt in my mind that she is also telling him things. So I don't pay attention to her. However, I do have a good friend that I would trust with my life and my sons that is keeping a close on eye him also...through her husband, of course. She deleted him as soon as she found out about everything! He posted today that he has "free time" and is going to get out of the house. I don't know if that means anything to me or not but with his previous threat/post, I am really worried.

Thank you for your words, Outtanowhere. I am really trying to do my best! I FINALLY see him for what he is. All I can do at this point is protect my son from anymore of his craziness and bullshit! I do NOT let him see what he is doing to me. So as far as he concerned, I don't even know about his posts or anything he is up too.

BBM want check in on you and see how you are and make sure your WH hasn't done anything stupid re the threats. Let us know how you are.

My weekend was uneventful, THANK GOD! I really was worried because he has proven to be mentally unstable. I do believe that he received something from my lawyer on Friday, though. He posted "I am not gonna go to no fucking class to tell me how to raise my kid! So fuck her." on Facebook. Lovely language and grammar. I didn't say he had to go to the class, the State of Missouri says he has to go. I didn't actually expect him to. Obviously, he is doing such fantastic job already of raising his kids. He doesn't need help....hahahaha! Yeah. My lawyer didn't expect him to either. There are ways around it, it just will drag out the divorce proceeding even longer.

Oh he also says he has his half of the divorce fee. I will believe that when I see it. Won't be holding my breath on that! He just wants it to look like I am the one dragging my feet and he is the "good" guy! EVERYONE that has any sense knows better than that.

Another post said that he had planned on posting pictures but didn't want the bad karma to catch up to him. Um...a little too late for that, I think.

BBM - Oh honey I am so damn proud of you and your progress. You really do get it, and know that you are the good guy now.

He is such a mess. I am sure the state of MO would love to see his comments about not attending no damn parenting class.....

Hopefully he will pay up so you can get the D ball rolling. It will give you a sense that there will be finality to all of this.

(((and strength)))

"I am not gonna go to no fucking class to tell me how to raise my kid! So fuck her."

This guy is such a mess. An uneducated mess, if I'm to be honest.

Only a complete douche canoe would make ignorant statements like that for the world to see. Does he think he comes off looking cool? He makes himself sound like an ignorant hillbilly who shouldn't be allowed to own goldfish, much less be a parent.

Are you down on your knees thanking the powers that be for giving you a second chance in life? If you haven't done so yet, you will soon.

[This message edited by NeverAgain2013 at 1:52 PM, September 15th (Monday)]

Oh he also says he has his half of the divorce fee

What does this mean?

I hope this doesn't mean you are both using the same attorney.

No,I have my own and as far as I know he doesn't have one. I had told him early on that I couldn't afford a divorce on my own and if he wanted to be civil and decent (hahahahaha!!) then we could split it. That obviously didn't work....

And sadly, he is very educated. He is actually smart....but stupid! Does that make sense? I am glad that I am finally seeing the light. Everything that he has been posting makes him look ignorant, not me. He wants me to look like the crazy one....haha nope. THAT IS ALL HIM. As Sheldon would say, "My mom had me tested!"

And sadly, he is very educated. He is actually smart....but stupid! Does that make sense?

Yes it does. He is what my grandmother used to call "an educated FOOL".

I hope you got a screenshot of that FB post.

No,I have my own and as far as I know he doesn't have one. I had told him early on that I couldn't afford a divorce on my own and if he wanted to be civil and decent (hahahahaha!!) then we could split it. That obviously didn't work....

Yeah...that's not going to work. Don't hold your breath or wait for him to come up with his "half". You'll never get it.

Just get your lawyer paid, file and let STBXH worry about finding and paying for his own attorney.

I am having a really hard time today. It started yesterday. I am not so sure if it was so much what my H says he did or that someone that I thought was my best friend would tell me, knowing it would hurt me.

She told me that he had posted a few days ago that he had $75 that he was going to give to me for our son but he couldn't get ahold of me because I changed my number and was keeping him from his son. Whatever, he didn't even try, my house number hasn't changed. That was just another tactic to attempt to make me look bad. Then she went on to say that he probably spent that $75 on roses for his whore and her breakfast in bed that she was bragging about on Facebook. Why would someone tell me that?!? I don't need to know the good things he is doing for her. IT ONLY HURTS ME! And she, of all people, should know that! I just told her the night before that I didn't understand how a fleeting 2 second thought could make me cry! I started crying of course, but tried to hide it before my son came inside. But he caught me and said...."I got upset today on the bus." And his friend said, "Yeah, he almost started to cry." Then he told me that the song Radioactive came on his Ipod and it made him really miss his dad. They loved that song. So that really didn't help my tears. God, I hate this!

Like I said, I don't know if it is more that he is doing good things for her that he did for me or that my "friend" would tell me. I just don't get it.

(((BBM)))

Did you tell your friend that was hurtful to hear?

You do realize that its all a show they are putting on. They are attempting to create a false reality of him being super dad, and mean old mom won't let him be around him.

You need to document this shit, because when it comes to divorce time, you have to be able to rebut this stuff. IF he decides to fight.

Remember....He IS NOT they guy they pretend he is on FB. He is an Addict. He is an abuser. He is a fucked up scared little shit, it was easier to run away than do what was right for not only his wife, but his son.

Please take a deep breath, remind yourself of all the crappy shit he has done, and remember YOU DESERVE MUCH MORE!!!!

I agree with TN. Please try to redirect your tears & heartbreak into determination. Start documenting this information. I know this is painful to hear, but you have to start thinking more logically. *IF* he has $75 to spend on roses, breakfast in bed, or any other luxury, extra for his OW. That is $75 you can now document he is *CLAIMING* to have that could be awarded to you and your son as support.

You HAVE to stop romancing this situation.

((((BBM))))

As tushnurse stated you need to be documenting everything because this is one nasty man and he will go as low as he has to with regards to your D. You have to protect yourself and your son from him and his lies because when it comes to D time he is going to lie. Document, document, document. The sooner your can remove this drama from your life the better, you need a D like yesterday so keep working toward that goal.

You know the truth and you know who and what he is, and his OW. What he would like the world to believe via FB is bullshit and everyone knows it. One nice thing he is too drugged up or stupid to understand that what he is posting on FB can be used as evidence against him. So use that to your advantage. Get screenshots of these posts and keep it in your D file, you will need them.

Focus on you and focus on your son. You are what matters and you deserve better and will get there. Just keep remembering what you know to be truth and do not fall victim to the lies and bullshit that he puts out there.

Be kind to yourself and go do something fun with your son BBM. It will get better

[This message edited by Hopetosurvive98 at 11:08 AM, September 19th (Friday)]

I told her in no uncertain terms do I need to hear ANYTHING that he is doing unless it DIRECTLY pertains to me or my child. I don't care if he buys her a fucking diamond, I don't need to know! All it did was set me back and wonder why this is happening. And my son saw me crying AGAIN. WE do NOT need that.

He has not made any effort at all to help financially or even visit his son. He is only interested in how he looks and how I look. Right now, he wants people to believe that I am the bad guy. Whatever. EVERYONE knows the truth, even him.

Wow. I just saw my husband with his whore for the 1st time. I feel as if I have been hit in the stomach with a sledge hammer. Over and over and over again.....sadly, my son felt that hit, also. Luckily, I was taking him to a friend so his mind will be occupied. Wow. This hurts. I knew it would happen eventually but I was hoping it would be a loooonnng time off.

Another awful, horrible, heartbreaking 1st down.

BIG hugs

he probably spent that $75 on roses for his whore and her breakfast in bed that she was bragging about on Facebook

It was probably street corner roses and a cold pop tart.

Just received a call at work that my dear husband came to the house and took our dog. My neighbor said she was pulling up as he was leaving. She stays outside during the day so I am assuming that he just pulled up and called her to him. At least, I am hoping that is all he did.I hope he wasn't in my house.

He would never hurt her, but I am worried about where he is taking her. She really is HIS but my son and I have become really attached to her. This is just another loss that I will have to explain to my son.

This is just him being an ignorant asshole and not caring who he hurts!!!

[This message edited by BaseballMom31 at 9:19 AM, September 25th (Thursday)]

BBM-the dog was on your property, this is your house and not his, youve been caring for the dog alone without a contribution from him for months. This seems like trespassing and theft to me and I would absolutely call the police. He had no right to enter your property and take that dog without your permission. Maybe others will come along and say I am wrong but I would 100% call the police.

I am so sorry that he is such blatant asshole. Of course you and your son are attached to the family dog, I am so mad for you!

This is just him being an ignorant asshole and not caring who he hurts!!!

That's exactly right.

Hope is right, if the house is yours, and he left he has no legal right to be there, you have a witness that he took the dog, and unless he has documentation stating the dog is his, you should charge him with theft and trespassing. His PO would love to deal with that BS.

He is for some reason taking the low road, the real low road to be a total dick for this process. You need to be prepared with both barrels so to speak.