SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Did your WS use condoms and or protections during the PA ?

My ex didn't.

This is a follow up to vent thread.

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=594085

Nope. Hence the resulting demon spawn.

Nope. You don't need those in unicorn land. Any cheater tells you otherwise is lying.

There are no unplanned babies or STDs to worry about there.

Always always always get the full STD workup and make your partner do too and be clean for 6 mos before having any unprotected sex.

[This message edited by tushnurse at 10:25 AM, September 22nd (Friday)]

Nope. She swore they did, every time. Even took the morning after pill once or twice. Sound strange? Yeah I thought so too.

Then I saw the video he took of them having sex, which he sent to her in spite after DDay because he knew I was watching her emails -- that's how I found out about the affair, after all. Real up close and personal action shot. Distinct lack of condom.

When I told her what I saw? Oh boy. "He told me he put one on", "it felt like he was wearing one", "I trust him" (to not have STDs). On what planet do you not see or feel what is happening? It wasn't exactly a poorly lit video.

God what a load of bullshit that was. How can you NOT KNOW? Can one of you ladies back me up, can you really not tell the difference between bareback and protected sex? It boggles my mind.

Nope. Although he lied to me for nearly a year and said he did. Just got STI tests today.

Nope, they never do. She also lied for 7 months adamantly. Apparently my WW was only concerned about getting pregnant and her AP told her about his vasectomy, so all good. Right??

Fantasy land indeed.

My husband did I even saw the box in one of OWs photos. However yes I can tell the difference between a condom or not and until 2014 had not used any in about 20 years.

He said yes, I got tested and so did he.

In the beginning they did..for how long I don't know..but apparently she would bleed alittle everytime so she went on the pill (or so COW told him)....so no condoms after that...but bleeding never stop..but no concern there for idiot WH apparently..

Nope .... Pretty sure she felt guilty that they'd did not use condoms, but we did. So, she asked me to get fixed. At the time , She said that she was having allergic reactions to the latex. ... still sounds "fishy " to me.

No, my WH didn't use condoms. He said she didn't look like the kind of person who had an STD So now I have a cancer causing strain of HPV and hmmmm...I wonder who I got that from?

Sort of (during second encounter), but OW1 was an active sex worker (stripper) during the first encounter when he went down on her; went down on her again 15 months later - wore a condom for PIV sex but again, no oral protection.

And with OW2: no protection while he performed oral sex on her, either. He did wear a condom (for PIV x 3), but she had cancer (cervical, most likely) and if that was caused by HPV (again, very likely), well, a condom doesn't protect against HPV. Two months after their sexy weekend, she had a hysterectomy due to cancer. I feel like it's a ticking time bomb for me.

Nope, but of course, she said she did. It was only after AP #4 (that I'm aware of) provided texts and emails where she talked about their interaction as well as her previous AP's could I confirm she didn't. Her AP was nice enough to hand write crib notes pointing out many of the sordid details.

Yes and no. Mostly no. Early on, WH never used condoms and that resulted in two OC with two different OW. The first was born during our first year of marriage. The second was born during our second year of marriage. Our daughter was born 3 months after the 2nd OC. After she was born, he had a vasectomy.

After the second OW had the OC, WH started using condoms with her until his vasectomy came back successful. After that, he went back to not using condoms. As twisted as it is, WH convinced the OW that they were trying for another OC (at her insistence). He neglected to mention his vasectomy to her though.

The only time he used a condom after that was with my sister once in a while. He said that he would insist on wearing a condom with her when her lady parts stunk really bad. Either that or he would insist on receiving oral only. To me, her stinking that bad should have been more than enough to not be willing to go there no matter how many condoms were being worn. He said he didn't want to hurt her feelings to badly by rejecting her completely. Whatever! So that made him willing to poke that pot despite the obvious risks and be willing to bring that shit home to me. UGH!

No, he lied and said he did, though. It wasn't until I found out about AP#2 and saw the FB message she sent him saying "Hey, Mr. "I don't want anymore kids" but you nut in me 3 times.. How are you?" That the truth of his recklessness came out. Thank God there aren't any OCs. The fact that he didn't even attempt to protect my health/our financial stability is the thing I struggle with the most.

H claims they did the first time, but then not after that. She worked in the hospital cafeteria and told him she had to get tested every six months for STDs so she knew she was clean.

He fell for that. Sure explains why I was getting yeast infections all the time, when I'd never had a problem before. I got tested for STDs right away and get tested every year for HPV. So far nothing, but I keep waiting for something to show up.

I'll never be able to forgive him for taking the risk of exposing me to God knows what. I'm so very thankful I didn't get anything.

Nope. He never even considered it. The AP, although experienced as a cheater, was too perfect to have any diseases. Plus, he was having ED issues, so why add any more impediments to the star struck love fests?

For the prostitute, he purchased (but didn't use) condoms. He also purchased them for use with Escorts 1 and 2. ED problems with #2 meant the condom tore so she offered to go out to her car and get another. She never came back.

Me? I got BV--not technically an STD but definitely a first for me. The antibiotics for it caused yeast infections. Then I went back and forth between YI and BV--sometimes both simultaneously--for months and months and months. It took years, lots of meds, and probiotics to finally get my always-before healthy system back to normal.

Not that I cared what happened to them (his cornucopia of loose women), but I reminded him that I had herpes (since I was 3--likely the oral type transferred to my genitals via my thumb-sucking). If she was so special, how could he dare expose her? BTW, my SAWH is a PhD scientist (hard sciences). And an atheist. Yet he could pretend that science wasn't valid when it came to sexual health. They're clueless when in La La Land, aren't they? Amazing!

Nope. AP told him she didn't have any STDs, and he believed her because of course she was such a "nice" person that she would never lie about something like that.. Since he had a vasectomy several years back, they didn't see any need. She was not on any BC either. Idiots. Both of them.

Reading this thread just makes me so sad. It just confirms the dense fog that clouds the A brain.

As Tushnurse says..

You dont need those in unicorn land. Any cheater tells you otherwose is lying.

There are no unplanned babies or STDs to worry about there.

My H didn't. His AP was a healthcare professional and therefore had to undergo regular testing. She had also had a hysterectomy (due to cervical cancer) therefore no chance of pregnancy.

I paid the price with BV and a couple of little other gifts. Of course, he lied about the sex for years so I didn't have the privilege of knowing that the pain I was experiencing was due to his infidelity. It's only in retrospect that I am able to piece it together. I feel so violated.

Nope, the OM got snipped. Messed up thing is, I still used condoms with WW while the OM wasn't. That part really gets to me...