SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

To all...my mental health is steller. Kemstel/Anoldlion thanks for your comments...regarding my decision to proceed..Donna now possesses information to help determine her future. I reviewed the previous divorce decrees..in all 4..POS OM..attempted fraud..forging auto titles, obligating spouse to joint delinquent loan judgements,attempt the confiscation of valuable spousAL assets, delinquent tax liabilities, hidden joint-collateral, unknown second mortgage committments, on, and on. Donna appears to have been awarded a substantial medical judgment in 2011..6 years before her marriage to POS...so Donna can now decide how to protect, share, or expose her assets.

Yes I have considered all aspects of my decision..the risks are minimal, if necessary i will seek a protective restraining order...only facts have been presented..public record...POS is very acquisitive toward former spouses..my only regret is not knowing prior to the Oct 2017 marriage. The marriage was NOT researched...I only discovered it through information from a friend who dispises POS OM throught work relationship for 25 over years...public records are readily accessible to all..one hour including drive time, research, $.25/ copy..plus $5.00 certification fee.

If POSSIBLE OM gets displaced by Donna...the FWW and I will enjoy knowing he 'fell on his sword'...if not he knows where the information was derived. Being retired..this Personal Investigation Stuff is intriguing...or insert your own synonyms...depending on your own perceived counseling expertise...

Again POS has mislead 4 wives over a 35 year span..doesn't seem he will change his approach..Donna, of all ex wives has the most $$ exposure. It's up to her now.

Consequences are a good thing.

POS OM's Jeep has not been at the house since Saturday..Memorial Day weekend..only vehicle is Donna's white SUV...SO...maybe a change in 'status' for POS OM...will keep everyone posted...

Thank you for the update.

Tsk, tsk. Trouble in unicorn land

I feel sorry for Donna but I believe you did the right thing.

I certainly would want someone to tell me - and I thank God that someone decades ago took me aside and told me “the love of my life” was a serial cheater. I had no idea!!!

It was that well hidden.

Blessings to you. From victimized spouses and mates everywhere. We are grateful to people like you.

Thanks for the update. That was a good thing that you did.

Hmm, sounds like Donna is glad you informed her. BS's across the globe thank you!

I didn't read every single post in this thread but enough of them to realize that a lot of other posters have made assumptions about what you've done and why, without reading your explanations.

You did the right thing. Don't ever question that. If I was in Donna's shoes, I would be extremely grateful and I'm glad you had the courage to inform her.

I realize you haven't been spending time obsessing about this, but what you have gotten caught up in is, the naivete to try to answer the comments of posters who keep asking you the same questions over and over again and not liking your answers and you keep trying to explain further trying to get them to understand. That can become an obsession of sorts. At this point, I believe you've spent more time trying to get some of the S.I. people to understand than you spent getting copies of the divorce records and medical settlement, etc.

How you and your wife reconciled is between you and if the 2 of you are happy today, that's all that matters.

I've read much of this thread, not all. I wish someone would have had the integrity, or vindictiveness, or a mix of motives, or whatever, to tell me. Their motive would be of no concern to me, and one can surmise until blue in the face at the motives but will never really know or understand. Nor do they need to.

I would have wanted the information.

One must do what they must do, period, and I wish for you that this is your final "must do", and that your future is wonderful.

I agree. I wish I had been told, instead of living with suspicion and lies. I wouldn't have cared about the reason behind it, just tell me whats going on.

Thanks to those offering support for my action(s)....and josiep several followers believed I was obsessing through out the past 24 years...it is difficult to convey one's actions during those many years and the limited descriptions of my efforts documented here. Being retired one has time to devote to research when at the courthouse on routine duties of boat licence, property taxes, auto licences, etc...it seemed many detractors here believed I was dwelling daily in research activities..

My route of 27 years from home to the center of my commerce (Lowes, Home Depot, Crackerbarrel, Longhorn Stakehouse) leads me within two houses of Donna and POS OM....so it is easy to take inventory of their domicle..during my daily multi-passes...so I shall keep noted comings and goings..in a few weeks I will return to the courthouse to renew my Concealed Carry Licence, and will likely visit the clerk's office to see if separation/divorce proceedings have been recently filed..

FWW accepts her role in the events of 24 years ago..she also places much blame on former best friend/POS OM's sister for placing her in a position of vulnerability without benefit of true circumstances...so she too quietly basks in POS OM falling on his sword of continued deceit and lies...

Well I'm another who thinks you did Donna a really good turn.

Good on ya nlwsrw.

I expect you have nothing to worry about with POSOM. Generally, they are cowards. Cussing at you anonymously on the phone all those years ago is probably as bold as he will ever get. If you ever get the chance to speak to Donna again ( in public, in her yard, etc.) I'd check in with her.

Again, Job well done.

FWW and I just drove into town...returning from a 10 day cruise....Donna's house has a 'FOR SALE' sign in the yard...her white SUV in the driveway...but no sign of POS's Jeep...

Thanks for the update.

Chuckles on POS. Sad for Donna's disappointment but hoping she gets through it well.

After reading your first post in this thread, I immediately agreed with your intent to notify the 6th wife. If it were me, I WOULD want to know. I then read all remaining posts, positive and negative, and understand both sides (but so happy you went through with the delivery).

One member's response in particular made reference to puzzles which caught my eye. In a short period of time, you had gathered updated documents and information which allowed the remaining puzzle pieces to fall into place. Many people perform best when analyzing and connecting the dots, then closing the loop before moving on to the next project.

It seems this puzzle has now been completed, the for sale sign has been placed. I'm curious, what do you plan for your next project?

[This message edited by OnceWasEnough at 1:11 AM, July 19th (Thursday)]

nlwsrw

I have just one suggestion - please do seek psychiatric counseling. This obsession with a 24 year old event is unhealthy by any yardstick.

Do you have a fulfilling career? Close friends and family? Hobbies and interests, something relaxing like yoga, fly-fishing, golf, etc. Practice mindfulness to live in the present. Don't let the past ruin your present and future.

Your posts are very painful to read, my friend. Wish you a speedy recovery.