SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

This delightful statement:

"I don't kiss her! She kisses me!"

Impressive how they all pretty much say the same thing, albeit with a twist here and there.

The twist I got was- home was too stressful- Um yeah....he let his out of work alcoholic sister move in who was a mean drunk.

Also, we worked opposite shifts and he was bored when he got out of work.

He finally started getting somewhere, when he told me he was a selfish, self centered prick who felt he deserved the escape from the crappy ass life that he had built and that he was always disappointing me—because of his crappy ass choices.

I was “too hard driving”, “too black and white “ and he “thought our marriage was over”

The AP was under the impression that WH and I were getting a divorce, weren’t having sex, and that I was a hypochondriac.

Kinda buzzkill to let her know WH and I were fucking regularly, I wasn’t a hypochondriac, and we weren’t divorcing. WH filled her head with some real winners

It isn't like I loved them.

Oh damn, you should have told me that we could just fuck anyone we wanted while married as long as we didn't LOVE them. I had no idea. All this time I was not sleeping with other people. My bad.

Do a little research on the Internet and I'm sure you'll find lots of advice on how to cheat and get away with it.

There's a particular "adultery" sub-forum on a popular Internet site that specifically caters to cheaters sharing best practices with each other. If you're still emotionally invested in the outrageousness of this whole situation, I wouldn't recommend seeking it out.

Really amazing - all so similar. My WW's twist is that she will say "don't get worked up about the A and the sex. That's only a symptom. The marriage had been dead for four years because I never felt validated by you." Now, she would never use a word like "validated" normally - either the phrases are burnt into their firmware EEPROM or they grab any psychobabble phrase they may have picked up.

One day when it won't trigger me I want to go back the last 11 months of text and make a list of grievances against me, there's some good ones! What I find interesting is she started saying things to me that were a reflection of herself and what she thought of herself but towards me. Like how I am self absorbed, selfish, no integrity, care more about my ego, that I never loved her but just loved the idea of having a family(cake is good), self righteousness, thiks I'm better then everyone, crazy and delusional, a narcissist, don't care about the kids etc. All those things are totally her. It's funny looking back now that I have clarity and how her mind works how she tells me things about me that is a way of her expressing who she is. But she doesn't even know it.

There's a particular "adultery" sub-forum on a popular Internet site that specifically caters to cheaters sharing best practices with each other. If you're still emotionally invested in the outrageousness of this whole situation, I wouldn't recommend seeking it out.

There are 100's of them, including the ones that I used to visit for picking up married women (no, that's not why I was visiting, I wanted to pick up women, but there are subforums there teaching "married game" and, let me tell you, if you want the "cheaters handbook" there's no better place than that to look). It's so scripted it would almost be laughable if it didn't cause so much pain. Here are the 10 things that married women are looking for and often not getting out of their marriage and here's the way to hit those buttons. My W's AP certainly either read or inferred this stuff (or writes it, who knows) because he followed the script to a T. And my W reacted just how the script predicted.

It makes me very sad to see things like that, how predictable people are and how easy it is to use emotions to get the actions that you want. The 180 is another example of this, why do we recommend it? Because it works. And why does it work? Because it emotionally impacts the WS in the most significant way possible, causing the reaction that we desire as BS's.

I hate that psychological tricks work, but they do, incredibly well, at least on a lot of people.

Asked why not concerned about getting medical tests done, he said that he didn't have sex. Clarifying, he didn't view oral sex as having sex. Wow...but there is always more.

"She is just a coworker." "Just a friend."

Yes we kissed, but only on the cheek." (Meaning 18 months of fucking).

"I honestly didn't think you would care."

"I thought our marriage was dead."

"You are gaslighting me." (Texted to me while he was still lying after Dday, denying anything more than cheek kissing).

"Trust me, nothing will happen." (Narrators voice: they fucked. Again).

Not sure if this can be considered the cheater's handbook, as it is so outrageous. Other than just adhering to their mantra which is "When you are caught, lie. The more unbelievable the lie is, the better. Give as many extraneous details as possible to make it more believable. No matter how ridiculous the lie is, just do it. It's better than admitting the truth."

Caught them at the beach together:

"She's my potential daughter, coming back to try to see if I'm her Dad. We will get a blood test to determine paternity over thanksgiving break, she's just so busy with school right now. I think she might be mine though, she has my ears (his ears??? wtf??) But her hair is really dark, so maybe she is JJ's (another friend who had apparently also fucked this ONS 18 years ago??)

2 weeks later, caught them in our bed together:

*He is standing holding a blanket covering only his penis, she is still naked and refuses to get out of our bed*

Me: Your long, lost daughter, huh? Let's add incest to the long list of your sexual perversions, shall we?

Him: You're full of s*%!, I never said that. I've been telling you for 6 months that I don't want to be with you. I don't understand why you don't understand. I'm really starting to worry about you, I think you might be crazy because you're clearly not getting it." Also "you'd better leave, or I'm calling the police." WTF??????

mine said your grandma wouldn't let me in the house to talk to you.

The marriage was doomed anyway... that's why she begged my best friend not to out her, promising she would go to IC and do whatever it took. LMFAO.

“I fell in love because you made my life hell for the past 2.5 years”. This is during our supposed “reconciliation” 😂. And OW is the wife of his BFF 🤮

By hell he probably meant that I had been questioning him again and again for 4ish months if there was anything going on between him and OW (while the A was underway) and he kept denying 🤮

[This message edited by Noname2016 at 8:29 AM, April 22nd (Monday)]

"I don't kiss her! She kisses me!"

I hate it when women do this.